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Old 09-24-2008, 07:33 PM
Location: Central Fl
2,903 posts, read 10,906,677 times
Reputation: 2858



Have you tried the San Diego forum?

Perhaps go to tennis shops asking about younger leagues?

Give it time....decide what you like to do, and get involved in those other things. Volunteer. Helping others helps get your focus off you. Check out library clubs, YWCA's, church groups, etc......good luck!

Frank D.
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Old 09-24-2008, 09:53 PM
Location: West Coast
64 posts, read 288,174 times
Reputation: 48
Default Give it time

Moving 3,000 miles away from home would be difficult for many,
even if that place is beautiful San Diego. I would recommend
going to a local athletic club, or University to inquire about
Tennis clubs in the area. Sometimes word of mouth can be
more effective than random searches online. Continue
talking to your family back home. Maybe they could visit.
That eases homesickness somewhat.
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Old 09-25-2008, 10:31 PM
Location: Austin, Texas
538 posts, read 1,655,859 times
Reputation: 354
I feel for you as I think it is much harder moving when it is not totally by choice. San Diego has a lot to offer and I am sure if you go on the OC board you will find plenty of info on where to find tennis clubs.
Have you thought about getting involved in a church or volunteering to meet others?
I find it hard to believe that as a sales person you cannot find a job. I know the economy is rough right now but the job market should be better in SD than where you were. You haven't really given yourself much of a chance. One month is nothing. You need to look at this as an adventure. Don't worry about it being forever because you never know what tomorrow brings. Just think someday you will be able to say, "I lived in California for awhile." I am sure if you are still that unhappy in a few years your hubby will be happy to move, but you need to give it a chance. Your feelings of being homesick are completely normal. Even when a move is by choice and planned many still get homesick. Once places become more familiar, and you start to meet others, you will feel much better. Stop beating yourself up for normal feelings and look forward to each day as a chance to explore a new area and get to know another part of the country. Good luck !
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Old 09-25-2008, 10:41 PM
Location: San Diego
34,887 posts, read 31,933,422 times
Reputation: 19359
Everyone has a hard time moving. It takes about a year to deal with it, I've done it too. There are lot's of Marketing positions if you just know where to look. I can point you to some good businesses if you would like.

We need more tax PAYERS here not welfare and WIC recipients. I'd be glad to help.
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Old 10-08-2008, 10:02 PM
13 posts, read 26,212 times
Reputation: 21
I am in the exact opposite position. I moved from SD to Atl last year. I hate it here! The weather sucks, its HOT its cold, it rains, it hails, thunder & lightening or draught conditions. HOME INVASION robberies are rampant. I miss San Diego. I miss sitting at the ocean, staring out at the beauty of the sun setting into the fog bank, the night and morning clouds, the cool ocean breeze every evening, the sunrise coming over the mountains anouncing another beautiful day in paradise. Rubios Fish Tacos and In-n-Out Burgers! The Over The Line competitions on Fiesta Island, saying goodbye to the Zonies each Labor Day weekend. Yes, it cost alot to live in PARADISE but when you live in Atlanta its 'just another day' in Hell! No one in SD plays tennis, take up jogging!
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Old 10-09-2008, 12:36 PM
4,009 posts, read 7,649,889 times
Reputation: 3505
Try to tough it out. Eventually, you hopefully will snap out of it. Don't do what I did. It's doubtful in your situation since you are married and are more tied in. Im my case I started to get homesick and second guessed myself. I bought a plane ticket home, gave my friend some money to hold him over, and split. It was the dumbest thing I have ever done and it haunts me daily. Now, Im not as well off as I was. I had a damn mini-stroke tia which has set me back tremendously. Financially Im improving but now is not the time. In 09 after doing research on keeping insurance or getting some kind of temporary insurance to hold me over until Im settled I hope to leave again. And, I know now not to flake out. I will make it. And, I will never have a tia stroke again as I have become very rigorous with health. I wll get off this toprol XL and I will leave for good!
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Old 10-11-2008, 11:30 AM
Location: Crossville TN
179 posts, read 508,258 times
Reputation: 50
Honey, I felt the sameee way when we first got to Europe. Give yourself time to get used to your new surroundings! Don't except that like a magic trick your old life will be back, but in a new spot. Just give it a little time & patience and BE OPEN. Don't stress yourself "hunting" for stuff, but just be open minded to new people, new things to do etc. and don't dig yourself into your house.
Trust me, once you'll either have your free time filled out (with Tennis or anything) or once you have a job, once you have some type routine established again in your new life you'll start feeling better!
Just go out & about & explore your new surroundings.
I know its hard and it'll take time, but God knows if I survived being Overseas- You'll be doin just fine too
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Old 10-12-2008, 12:29 PM
Location: northeast headed southwest
531 posts, read 821,962 times
Reputation: 246
I've moved away from all my friends multiple times. I think a good rule is to suspend judgment for at least 1 year. You will always hate the new place at first. You will always miss your friends at first. Then you will make new friends and find new places to go. Be patient, 1 month is not enough time to get to know a new place
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Old 10-13-2008, 03:22 AM
2,015 posts, read 4,651,641 times
Reputation: 1863
Originally Posted by mb06 View Post
I just moved for my husband's Job from Atlanta, GA to San Diego. I had a really good job there. I am having trouble finding one here as the Job Market here is awful. We really don't want to go back there because of family there. But we had so many friends there and a life.

He likes it here. I wonder am I crazy it is so beautiful here and the weather is really perfect. What the heck is wrong with me!!!

I used to play tennis in like 4 leagues there. I can't seem to find a club here that have people my age. I really just miss it. I cry everyday. My husband doesn't know what to do anymore. I'm trying to convince him to move to Dallas. Where there are more jobs and tennis clubs. I just worry that he will not be happy there and blame me.

Any advice is appreciated.
Well, the first thing that comes to mind is that moving when you really don't want to move has got to suck on some level. Making such a huge change in your life by moving across the country and having to start anew making friends, getting a job, etc. is going to take some time and it's a major opportunity for growth for you. I don't know how Dallas would help because even if there are country clubs and jobs, you'll still be in the same boat. I don't think moving to Dallas right after you've already moved to San Diego is going to be the solution, especially since your husband is liking San Diego. I'm not trying to make light or make less of your homesickness; I realize that you're trying to move out of the pain you're in and thinking that moving somewhere else would be better. Again, give it some time and in the meantime get yourself out there meeting people, or just joining things that you enjoy. You are going to meet other like-minded people. You're going to eventually get a job. Don't give up so soon. It will all work out.

P.S. - I would LOVE to move to San Diego, and in fact, this is one of my goals. I feel "good" about it because this is what I want and have wanted for a long time. Many of my friends and business associates live there so I would have a network of people I know already. However, it I would move to another part of the country where I know no one and had to start all over again, I would feel like you, would feel lost, would cry, etc. I think this is normal. Just give yourself some time and take the good advice that you've received this far from other posters. Wishing you the best!
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Old 10-17-2008, 12:20 AM
2,478 posts, read 4,848,832 times
Reputation: 4483
Moving to another city is definitely not the answer. I'm currently struggling with my new home in Montana, but I know that running to another city is not the answer...how do I know? Because thats how I ended up in Montana. I moved to Chicago from Dallas and then left Chicago after only 4 weeks because I missed friends and was torn up over my dad dying. I figured the best place was my best friends home in Montana. I figured it was a good compromise as opposed to going back to Dallas. I got here and nothing has changed. I still miss my group of friends in Dallas.
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