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The reason you moved was you weren't happy where you lived. Why go back to that? Make new friends and visit your family on holidays and your vacation. OR how about you help pay for them to come see you?
I do miss being near the ocean and family in California. We like the pace of life here in Ga and the fall colors have blown me away. I think we are going to like having "seasons" but...at the end of the day we miss our family and their help and involvement with our children and it would be nice to go down to the beach.
We can buy a gorgeous home here and not be so stressed out about money. It is nice being a stay at home mom.
I feel sad and guilty for trading "family" for this "lifestyle" that I want.
??????
If you and your family are all happy try not to feel guilty. It sounds like you aren't, and I understand that. I left home 10 years ago too. I have a nice house, but it really can't compare to being around my family. I wouldn't trade the experince though since it has helped clarify what is more important to me. Some people (my husband is one of them) could care less if they live around family. I'm not one of them. My sisters are my best friends, and I miss them very much. A house is just a house, but family is precious. That said, try to find something positive about your situation so you are not miserable.
If the choice is between living beyond your means in Cal. or living within your means in Ga., I'd try to make it work in Ga a bit more. Being a stay at home Mom can have wonderful benefits to your children. Also, the lack of stress that money issues bring can also do wonders for family, marriage, etc. These outweigh being closer to beach and extended family any day.
It's such a awesome feeling to have the bills paid, and see your savings grow without the stress of wondering how the bills will get paid.
Suggestions for the family.......buy yourselves and the inlaws webcams so you can see each other via the web on regular "dates". You have e-mail and cheap, (free) long distance phone calls. There is a real good feeling when people actually write letters on paper and mail them. Save up the money you are saving and do a once a year trip.
The original poster has not posted in months, so my guess is she will not be seeing these posts....I wish her the best.
Thank you Faithful Frank. Still on the fence and waiting to see what home prices do.....maybe we can eventually go back to CA. Air travel is getting very expensive and in the end it may make more sense to go back home to Ca if we can afford a home there with the falling economy, luckily my husbands job is very secure.
Dear OC,
welcome back! I wish you the best in whatever you decide, and hope that if it is to stay awhile longer, perhaps some of the suggestions will make it easier for you.
My husband and I did the same thing 15 years ago when we left SoCal for Idaho. The first year we moved we visited twice. We we sooo homesick. We some family up here because they promised a job for us which worked out initially then turned out to be a big mistake and we aren't even close to them anymore. We were able to afford a home and yes, our monthly mortgage was the same as rent for our apartment. I was able to stay home and raise our kids and he didn't have to work two jobs. So there is always the good and the bad. You just have to decide what your priorities are.
It's been 15 years and I still miss the ocean and I don't like the winter.
Our children weren't raised around family but they saw them at least once a year. Telephone and emailing helped to keep them close.
I'm fortunate to have been able to move to where I always wanted to move to, and still only be 80 miles from family, so weekend visits are frequent, us going home and them coming here. We originally said we only wanted to be gone for a couple of years, but unless southern Illinois gets an influx of jobs (which I don't see happening), I don't see how we could go back. I work in technology, and there just aren't many IT jobs there. Plus I'm 23 and make a very good salary for my age. 6 months after I moved from so. Ill I was making $15k more (salary per year).
Well we all make mistakes. Many people move to areas they find they dislike. If being close to family she loves......and if being in an area she has felt comfortable with means " full happiness" for her.....
Then giving up the bigger house, the bigger paychecks, could be worth the move back.
We should all try to live in a heartwarming place. Dump the lofty ideas of grandeur.
Find peace in a simpler life, around those we love the most..........life is surely short.
Best of luck to her.......
Her husband is her family now, and he's apparently providing a pretty good life for her. This is blunt, but you should wean yourself from mommy and daddy before you decide to take on married life.
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