U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > General U.S.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Old 03-20-2012, 08:02 PM
Location: Minneapolis / St Paul
323 posts, read 421,710 times
Reputation: 144


For anyone who's lived in both, did you find the size of the city (population, not square miles) seemed to correlate with the openness, or friendliness of the people living there?

I've lived most of my adult life in a large city in the Midwest, and I haven't found the people to be particularly open to friendship, beyond being rather shallow acquaintances. Maybe my style just isn't a fit for the dominant culture; I am a bit of an outlier in certain aspects... But how to know if somewhere else would be a better fit?

How much does the area of the country influence the Friendliness Factor? Or is the part of the country more important than the size of the city? Or do you have an entirely different theory?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

Old 03-20-2012, 09:43 PM
Location: New York NY
4,269 posts, read 6,351,433 times
Reputation: 9061
Size of the city makes no difference because you don't live in a city, you live in a neighborhood in a city. And each neighborhood will feel different; friendly, snobbish,hostile, down to earth or whatever. Even in small towns there can be big differences in how one part or another feels to you. So don't worry about the size of the city. Worry about the fit of the neighborhood
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 03-21-2012, 11:28 AM
Location: Viña del Mar, Chile
16,411 posts, read 26,242,811 times
Reputation: 16496
Plus it depends how you treat people, I've lived in "rude cities" only to find people are actually very friendly as long as you are too
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 03-21-2012, 09:54 PM
Location: Victoria TX
42,663 posts, read 74,281,369 times
Reputation: 36087
The characteristics of your own life have a lot more to do with it. If you live in the suburbs of a big city, you could very well go several years without knowing a single neighbor by name. But if you live in the inner city, and walk to all your shopping and entertainment and your neighbors do too, you are living in a "small town", whether or not your neighborhood is surrounded by suburbs or cow pastures.

The key is having opportunities for personal exposure to the people nearby with whom you can nurture a friendliness.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 03-21-2012, 10:31 PM
Location: Guangzhou, China
9,779 posts, read 13,361,441 times
Reputation: 11309

I've lived in small towns, big towns, small cities, big cities, and it really depends on tons and tons of factors.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 03-21-2012, 10:45 PM
3,644 posts, read 9,005,408 times
Reputation: 1798
Most people tell me that people in Chicago are friendly. This is coming from Southerners that I know..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 03-22-2012, 07:44 AM
606 posts, read 824,819 times
Reputation: 571
I'd say it's mixed and about even.
If you're a stranger in a small town obviously that's different than growing up there where everyone knows you. Good and bad. Also, people, in my experience, seem to be more 'open' downtown in an urban area where everyone is constantly in contact with people. Even strangers. Whether or not that's in a 'friendly' manner I don't know. Again, I don't think there's that big of a difference.

People, in general, just don't seem that friendly to me.
I dunno. Maybe it's just me & my face or something. lol.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 03-22-2012, 07:55 AM
Location: Raleigh, NC
1,446 posts, read 2,290,234 times
Reputation: 1361
Obviously there are a ton of factors that go into "friendliness", but to very broadly generalize, I would say that people in small towns tend to be friendlier than people in big cities as long as you fit into their picture of "normal."

A white protestant southerner will generally find white protestant southerners in a small town to be very friendly. Strangers are more likely to say hello, nod, etc. People are more likely to strike up a random conversation. Unfortunately, someone outside of the "norm" might find things a little less friendly in a small town (I'm not saying people will be rude, mean, etc, just that folks of differing nationalities, ethnicities, lifestyles, etc may not find people to be as active in approaching them).

On the other hand, people in big cities tend to keep to themselves a little more, but they also can be more open minded of different lifestyles, ethnicities, etc.

Walking down the street in Opelika, Alabama people will probably say hi to me. Walking down the street in New York City, not so much. Partly this may be just b/c in a big city there are too many people to interact with them all. At least this has been my general experience...again, there are tons of exceptions, factors, etc.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 03-22-2012, 01:53 PM
Location: Springfield, Ohio
12,201 posts, read 10,422,845 times
Reputation: 11215
jtur pretty much nailed it. It depends on your personal network...a bartender will meet more people than a computer programmer, a student living on-campus vs one who commutes from home, etc. You have to create your own opportunities, no matter where you live.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 03-26-2012, 07:01 AM
Location: Minneapolis / St Paul
323 posts, read 421,710 times
Reputation: 144
And I also think that people living in larger cities, with all the entertainments and distractions they offer, can be somewhat less receptive to including new people into their already over-scheduled lives.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.

Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > General U.S.
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top