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Basically, where does the connected sprawl/development/suburbia begin for your city? I think for Seattle it begins in Everett to the north, Tacoma/Lakewood to the south, Issaquah to the east, and obviously Seattle is bordered by the Puget Sound to the west. Some may say it begins in the Marysville/Arlington area to the north, but farmland/marsh separate Marysville from Everett.
Not asking what it is, I'm asking where it begins-example, where does the Los Angeles urban area begin?
The Census Bureau defines what are called "urbanized areas", designed to be more precise than metropolitan areas, which are based on county borders. There are very specific rules about what's supposed to be included--they're designed to include developed areas, but exclude undeveloped ones. The Seattle UZA goes up as far as Everett, but doesn't include Marysville, probably because of the undeveloped areas between them that you mentioned.
Greater Seattle stretches from Tumwater to Arlington. The only gaps are areas that can't be developed: Fort Lewis/McChord AFB, Nisqually NWR, and the mouth/floodplain of the Snohomish River. Going north, take SR 9 rather than I-5 to see constant development.
The San Francisco/San Jose metro area starts in Windsor on the north, Vacaville on the northeast, Brentwood on the east, the Altamont Pass on the southeast (sorry, Tracy people -- you aren't and never were in "the Bay Area"), Gilroy on the south. Of course there are lots of gaps -- like most of the San Mateo and Marin coastlines), but in general those places are where you suddenly hit Bay Area traffic and sprawl on the freeway.
Portland Metro starts out in Clark County, Washington on the northern edge of Vancouver, WA for the northern border. The western border is out on the edge of Hillsboro and to the east is the foothills of the Cascades and Columbia Gorge on the edge of Gresham. To the south the last city that feels like part of the metro is Wilsonville, though because of the urban growth boundary there's undeveloped land up on the edge of West Linn, Tualatin, and Oregon City in between there and Wilsonville--though on I-5 there's a sliver of development connecting the two.
The "Front Range Urban Corridor" (Denver) runs from Cheyenne, WY on the north to Pueblo, CO on the south. 2 states, 18 counties, 4.4 million residents.
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