U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > General U.S.
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 06-18-2015, 04:00 PM
 
Location: Charlottesville, VA
9 posts, read 14,917 times
Reputation: 15

Advertisements

I’m a liberal well-educated single black woman in my early 40s who has never been married, has no children, and does not want any. I work in the tech industry and have lived all over the country:
Williamstown/Boston/Milton, MA; NYC (which was way too big for me); Stamford/New Haven/Westport/New Canaan, CT; Los Angeles/San Francisco, CA

Currently, I’m in Charlottesville, VA which I have outgrown after 10 years: there is no dating scene for my age bracket (everyone is already paired up and busy with kids). I’m tired of living on a farm (l literally live on one with donkeys, cows, and the occasional horse) and want less isolation, more people, more diversity, and more cultural stimulation such as the ability to go to the ballet. **As well as more racial acceptance and harmony.** (The upswing of current news regarding militarized police violence, racial attacks, etc. really gets me down.)

My job has kindly given me the option of working remotely from anywhere in the US so I’m now sizing up locations without too much worry about employment as a factor in final location.

I’ve reviewed the Priceonomics blog and their ratings of the least segregated cities in America and the most integrated neighborhoods and also taken those ”Find your Spot” tests. The tests indicated the West for me such as California, Washington, or Oregon. I’ve done a cross country move twice now and don’t think I have it in me to do again.

I love the outdoors and greenery. I’ve already considered Richmond, VA and ruled it out. I’ve visited Seattle where it rained the whole time and didn’t like that. (Yet, I still went camping: setting up a tent in the rain is miserable!) I’ve also visited Albuquerque, NM and Denver, Boulder, Estes Park, and Aspen, CO and learned that the high elevations wreak havoc on my sinuses and I have an especially hard time acclimatizing. I currently have Raleigh, NC on my list as a place to visit to see if I like it.

*My ideal place would be: mid-size, liberal, diverse, have great racial harmony and acceptance, have interracial dating, have a dating scene for my 40+ age bracket, and have lots of greenery.

**Any suggestions for places?

I really appreciate the usefulness of the forums and all you kind people! (And the fact that you’ve read this far — I wanted to be thorough so as to solicit the wisest opinions!)

Thank you.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 06-18-2015, 06:05 PM
 
10,058 posts, read 4,657,640 times
Reputation: 15291
interracial dating as in someone asking you out on a date that is a minority or you asking a minority out?

I like KC, small city (to me) but liberal enough that it isn't conservative but not liberal enough to be crazy. Doesn't seem to have a problem with difference races dating here, but there aren't that many "races" here either... mostly white/yellow/black/brown, you'll have a hard time finding purple/green races... but we see red once in a while, maybe blue

not sure about dating scene for 40+....
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-18-2015, 06:32 PM
 
Location: Charlottesville, VA
9 posts, read 14,917 times
Reputation: 15
I'm a minority so it would be interracial dating as in me dating a majority race (i.e., white). I've been to Kansas City, MO for a week and it was too homogenous for my taste. But thanks for you input!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-18-2015, 08:20 PM
 
Location: SoCal
559 posts, read 1,123,081 times
Reputation: 612
Quote:
Originally Posted by telecommutermover View Post

<snip>

I work in the tech industry and have lived all over the country:
Williamstown/Boston/Milton, MA; NYC (which was way too big for me); Stamford/New Haven/Westport/New Canaan, CT; Los Angeles/San Francisco, CA

<snip>

want less isolation, more people, more diversity, and more cultural stimulation such as the ability to go to the ballet. **As well as more racial acceptance and harmony.** (The upswing of current news regarding militarized police violence, racial attacks, etc. really gets me down.)

<snip>

I’ve done a cross country move twice now and don’t think I have it in me to do again.

I love the outdoors and greenery.

<snip>

*My ideal place would be: mid-size, liberal, diverse, have great racial harmony and acceptance, have interracial dating, have a dating scene for my 40+ age bracket, and have lots of greenery.

**Any suggestions for places?
What is the reason for limiting your choices to mid-size cities?

I'm not sure if you are excluding the west coast? When is the last time you were in the Bay Area & LA and what parts did you live in?

How about Oakland and Berkeley in the Bay Area?

LA proper probably has many neighborhoods that you'd fit in. Nearby cities such as Pasadena and Long Beach have pretty nicely balanced racial diversity. Ditto Culver City. SoCal won't have the lushness that you want although cities such as Pasadena have lots of trees and you are only about 5 miles from the San Gabriel Mountains. LA will offer more cultural events than you can take in. Outdoor opportunities are close, diverse and plentiful.

I'm sure the Bay Area is the same but I don't live there.

I've read self-described black posters on the LA forum write that LA was a hostile environment to them, that brown vs black tension was high, while others have said that they've been able to go all over the metro with no worries and none of the type of racism seen in the South (e.g. Confederate flags).

Cities tend to have more professionals who marry later so there will be more chance to meet people similar to you. Although non-Hispanic whites are a minority in LA, given the huge population, that still means a big pool of people.

The LA forum has had several threads complaining about the difficulties of making friends and dating (often citing traffic, big distances and flakiness). These threads inevitably elicit posts that counter the difficulty argument so YMMV.

LA, especially the area around Playa Vista, Venice and the city of Santa Monica is a fast expanding tech center. The tech sector extends along the coast of Orange County all the way into San Diego. The Bay Area is synonymous with tech.

You might also check out cities in Ventura, San Diego and Santa Barbara Counties. Maybe also the California Central Coast.

What about Texas cities such as Austin, Houston, Dallas/Fort Worth?

Good luck.

Last edited by drunk on kool aid; 06-18-2015 at 08:28 PM.. Reason: added tech paragraph
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-18-2015, 11:26 PM
 
1,530 posts, read 1,495,197 times
Reputation: 1509
1)Alexandria, VA
2)Mercer Island, WA
3)Ann Arbor, MI
4)College Park, MD
5)Berkeley, CA
6)Madison, WI
7)Minneapolis, MN
8)Boulder, CO
9)Sommerville, MA perhaps
10)Hoboken, NJ
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-19-2015, 06:20 AM
 
Location: Richmond, VA, from Boston
1,424 posts, read 2,095,363 times
Reputation: 661
Why not Richmond? It seems to suit your list pretty well
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-20-2015, 12:10 AM
 
Location: Nashville, TN
5,063 posts, read 4,094,273 times
Reputation: 3674
Nashville, Louisville, Sacramento, Austin, and Denver may be too big, but I think you should consider it for sure.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-20-2015, 06:40 AM
 
6,559 posts, read 13,752,481 times
Reputation: 3030
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shakeesha View Post
Nashville, Louisville, Sacramento, Austin, and Denver may be too big, but I think you should consider it for sure.
This....great list. I would make Nashville, Louisville, and Austin my top 3 for sure.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-28-2015, 12:10 AM
 
Location: Los Angeles
4,786 posts, read 2,192,317 times
Reputation: 7161
OP have you considered Portland, OR? It scores high on walkability, outdoorsy activities and greenery, is definitely liberal. They get less rainfall than Seattle. I'd think interracial dating prospects would be better there than Nashville or Louisville. Austin is another great choice, but beware they have a short, mild spring, then it's 95 degree days May through September (I lived there for 3 1/2 years). Another drawback is no mountains. Raleigh has huge numbers of professional, unmarried people, but I found the people very socially conservative. Most people I knew were either living together or engaged by age 27 or 28, with interracial dating being a rarity. While there's lots of nice green spaces, I think there's less passion for outdoorsy activities there than the Pacific NW.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 06-28-2015, 02:24 AM
 
Location: Cleveland
3,179 posts, read 3,846,878 times
Reputation: 2473
Cleveland is pretty racially harmonious, compared to many other cities in this country. This is evidenced by the fact that despite several high profile incidents here involving black people and police, people protested peacefully and didn't devolve into rioting. We have a long history of racial tolerance here -- including the first black mayor of a major US city, Louis Stokes elected in 1967. While it's not perfect, I feel that Black people are not treated as second class, or out of place in Cleveland, and are accepted in pretty much all parts of town. Interracial relationships wouldn't be looked down on here.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > General U.S.
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top