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Old 08-16-2016, 07:08 AM
 
Location: San Antonio
5,286 posts, read 4,160,241 times
Reputation: 4349

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Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post
Right on. I raised my four biracial kids as a single mom right smack dab in the middle of East Texas, in a midsize town, in the 90s and early 2000s without any significant issues. When they got older, they dated who they wanted to - and so did I. I eventually remarried with no problem - a white guy from a small East Texas town, who loves and accepts my kids and their multicolored kids and spouses like they are his own "blood." My kids are all grown now and all but one is married - and their spouses are all over the DNA map! And no one gives a rat's arse around here.

I did have a problem with my future father in law when my husband and I got engaged, who was very old and very old school. He told me we would have "problems" and that folks around here didn't put up with that sort of thing. I said that was odd since I'd been living here for fifteen years and no one seemed to have a problem with it except him - and I was simply going to ignore that. I also told him that he was going to love me to pieces one day. And he did. But his initial reaction was that old school prejudice that can happen anywhere. It didn't slow my stride one bit.

And nothing "happened." Never has and I doubt it ever will.

I had one issue when I was registering my youngest in school and the school receptionist tried to make me check ONLY one box for his race. Good luck with that. I refused to check just one box, and left the section blank. She called me back up to the desk in front of about ten people and said loudly, "You have to pick one race." I just said, "No I don't," and didn't do it. What was she going to do - hate me? Burn a cross in my front yard? I don't think so.

It was years later when my son told me what a huge impression that made on him. He was very proud of me then.


One time when my oldest daughter was in junior high, a guy in her class liked her and his mommy told him he couldn't date her because she was brown and he wasn't. LOL, I had news for him - he couldn't date her anyway, because she was 14! My daughter was pretty put out with him but considering she had guys lined up wanting to be her boyfriend, it didn't bother her for long.

Oh, and one time when I FIRST moved here and we were living in a sort of crappy neighborhood because it was the first home I bought and it was all I could afford, I had some white trash neighbor get mad at me because HER son hit my son (accidentally) in the forehead with a baseball bat and my son needed stitches and I asked if she would pay 1/2 the ER deductible. She didn't want to do that and told me to keep my _____ kid out of her yard. So I took her to small claims court where she had to admit that she said that and that her son did cause the injury, and she had to pay me. It didn't go well with her in front of a jury when she admitted that she called my little six year old boy that name. I could see the looks of disgust on every face - of every color. They were literally out of the room for about ten minutes max!

So I guess in twenty five years I've had four negative experiences regarding race. Two were totally insignificant, one was interesting because it involved my future father in law (he and I were very close within just a couple of years by the way) and one was significant and "right" won via a jury of my peers, most of whom were as white as the driven snow.

It just hasn't been a big enough issue to even think about except in passing about once every ten years or so. I built a successful professional career here and have always had a wide circle of friends and good neighbors. My kids and I were happy living here together. Now they're grown and are none the worse for growing up in east Texas.
Lol. So Obama's "not" black either, right?
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Old 08-16-2016, 07:14 AM
 
1,462 posts, read 937,398 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gaylord_Focker View Post
I think black/white dating is accepted and common in the south. Begrudging or not.
I agree but I also now see a lot Hispanic and white.Mainly Mexican in cities like Dalton.
Ive been there alot since the 90's with college friends and I always found it interestiong because the black friends of mine who oinvited me up there always had several cousins,aunts etc that were white and had interracial children.
It just was not unusual at all.One of their Uncles married and a Vietnamese woman.Did not last because she later tried to kill him for cheating n her .lol
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Old 08-16-2016, 07:40 AM
 
1,462 posts, read 937,398 times
Reputation: 608
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gaylord_Focker View Post
I was pretty much the only Chinese guy in my grade through most of my school years. Grew up in south texas, which is actually fitting. would there be issues of Mexican/white dating? No. Atlanta has a lot of blacks, so of course it is super common. It isn't because whites in Atlanta are more tolerant to blacks, the acceptance is two pronged: 1. numbers. There are a ton of black people there. Why pick a fight with a near majority group. There aren't a lot of other races in Atlanta, like you stated. 2. history. Whites and blacks have a very long (yes at some point rough) history. They're at a state of acceptance.

Of course, I'm guessing years of recent conflict with the middle east haven't helped. It's just the way it is.
Its true everywhere you have a significant mnority population that you will have large numbers of inter marriage.
Out West ,Asian and whites are popular mix but not Blacks and Asians but no attention gets put on California for being racist like The South.

Dalton ,GA as I mentioned earlier is 65%white , 7%blackand 48%Hispanic.
Just be in that town 10 minutes and you will see white and black and rarely Hispapnic and black.Although white and Hispanic is common also.
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Old 08-16-2016, 08:01 AM
 
Location: San Antonio
5,286 posts, read 4,160,241 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Othello Is Here View Post
Its true everywhere you have a significant mnority population that you will have large numbers of inter marriage.
Out West ,Asian and whites are popular mix but not Blacks and Asians but no attention gets put on California for being racist like The South.

Dalton ,GA as I mentioned earlier is 65%white , 7%blackand 48%Hispanic.
Just be in that town 10 minutes and you will see white and black and rarely Hispapnic and black.Although white and Hispanic is common also.
Most of those Hispanics are immigrants. They don't usually marry out.
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Old 08-16-2016, 10:37 AM
Status: "could've~would've~should've used 'have', not 'of'" (set 20 days ago)
 
Location: A Yankee in northeast TN
10,485 posts, read 14,320,905 times
Reputation: 23286
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gaylord_Focker View Post
Reading those two threads and this one. All three are humble brags "I'm a good looking Indian" dating a "good looking blond haired, blue eyed white woman." Maybe these are fake?
For good measure you can usually find a reference to GA, and a reference to socialite, country club, or some other term used to imply elitism.
Some dude has been posting this nonsense for years and years. I don't know if it's just an obsession or if he gets bored and decides it's time to pot stir again. I find it 'interesting' that there is usually a brand new poster or two who apparently join just to back up the opinions expressed in the opening post, lol.
It certainly brings out all the old tired stereotypes about 'the racist south', maybe that's the point.
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Old 08-16-2016, 01:19 PM
 
1,462 posts, read 937,398 times
Reputation: 608
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gunion Powder View Post
Most of those Hispanics are immigrants. They don't usually marry out.
Not any.more. There is a significant amount of Hispanics that have been born or raised there since the textile industry has relied heavily on them.for years.
Many are assimilated.
I went up there a year ago to help a friend by a used pickup truck and our sales guy had the most Southern accent but was so obviously Mexican.
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Old 08-17-2016, 10:39 AM
 
Location: In the hot spot!
3,399 posts, read 4,803,577 times
Reputation: 3201
If it hasn't been suggested look at Phoenix. I think it's the interracial capital!
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Old 08-17-2016, 05:35 PM
 
3,597 posts, read 1,529,535 times
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Sorry about your experience, but I honestly don't think it's the norm, especially in most any major metro area. You have racists in the PNW, CA, everywhere. You will find them in all colors and nationalities. My son dated a bi-racial girl (but looked middle eastern), my bro-in-law is married to a black girl and has a bi-racial son, bro in-law is married to a Filipino girl w/ bi-racial daughter, I have a niece who's married to an Asia guy; all in the Charlotte area or Greensboro/Winston Salem area. No issues ever. They've said so. My wife and I go to a very large interracial church (approx. 60/30 racial make-up) in Greenville, SC with MANY interracial couples/families. Everyone gets along wonderfully. Not saying these things don't happen, but at no greater rate than most any other major metro. And I don't think it's a "church" or "South" thing either. It's an idiot thing and can, and is, found anywhere. No matter where you end up, hope you find the place that's right for you guys!
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Old 11-06-2016, 03:35 PM
 
1,220 posts, read 592,794 times
Reputation: 966
Quote:
Originally Posted by Metaphysique View Post
OP, I'm so sorry for the way you and your fiancee are being treated. There are a lot of racist and bigoted asshats out there. I get the appeal of LCOL, but the reality is, the most culturally and ethnically diverse areas with fewer issues of overt racism will be in the PNW, metro cities in California, and progressive areas in the Northeast. And Denver. There are other areas, pockets, but it's still iffy. You're chancing a lot if you don't know the racial climate of the area, and that's not something you want to consider lightly.

Your options are likely to be MCOL or HCOL. I love Nor Cal, and there are areas that are more affordable than others. I grew up in So Cal, but it can be pretty expensive. (also lived just outside of Seattle)



If Atlanta was a crapshoot why would Houston be any different? I would choose Atlanta over Houston any day. And "interracial" relationships may be common in metro cities, but certain interracial relationships are better received than others. Black + white? Pretty common these days, but still a big no-no in many areas. Just because people aren't calling out names to these couples doesn't mean the racism doesn't exist. White + Hispanic can be pretty similar. My former SIL's family gave her **** for dating a Puerto Rican and Italian man instead of a "local boy" (white country man), and the same for her first husband, who is Filipino. They live in SWVA.

But I was okay because my father's white and I can pass for "mostly white."

A white woman with a ME man in Texas? I bet they'd get just as much **** in Texas, even metro cities, as Atlanta.


OBVIOUSLY, you have no clue about Houston vs. Atlanta. I've lived in BOTH Cities and metro Houston is BY FAR more welcoming. First, its obvious when you visit, right off you see more diversity. Second, the metro areas politics are just more accepting. Hell, the mayor prior to the 2016 election was a Lesbian for TWO terms. Houston has a lot larger Asian/Indian population. Metro ATL is noticeably more segregated. Minorities are mainly eastside and southside, regardless of income status. Houston, I knew minorities who lives EVERYWHERE. An the cost of living in Houston is affordable as that in Atlanta.
It is just a more accepting place PERIOD.
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Old 11-06-2016, 03:41 PM
 
13,579 posts, read 22,033,104 times
Reputation: 4611
Quote:
Originally Posted by melissasloves View Post
We are both originally from the Pacific Northwest, Washington state to be exact, and we recently had to move down to Georgia (Atlanta to be exact) due to my job and because it is a lot more affordable than Washington. I am a Punjabi guy but completely westernized and my fiance's background is Danish. I have the black hair, brown eyes, and light brown skin while she has the blonde hair, blue eyes, and pale skin. We are both in our late 20s but we often got told that we look "younger". Both of us met back in college, hooked up, and it became serious for us after that.

Back in Washington, no one really cared, it was somewhat common to see Indian and Asian guys dating white girls. Definitely not the case in Atlanta, as we learned the hard way.

Well, Georgia has been a lot more affordable but a bit different for us. We have gone to stores and out to eat to where people practically stare at us, some of the stares are definitely met with anger. At times when we go to eat out together, I look around and there are tables just staring at us, it is that blank stare of disapproval. Some of the people have made comments like "brown boy with blonde woman, don't see that too often" and laughed afterwards.

I remember one time when we were eating, this guy (looked to be in his 20s and white) came over and stood next to my fiance, kept on hitting on her like I was not there. We ignored him but then he commented saying "guess some women do hate the American flag, hope that Muslim is worth it *****". We just stared and reacted in shock but then what came next shocked us even more, some guy clapped and gave him a thumbs up and said "Make America Great Again!". We ignored them and ate our meal but that meal was ruined due to what we went through.

At first we didn't want to admit it but then it became more and more obvious. I was talking to my fiance a week or so ago and some of the things she has told me about what other people have said about me behind my back have been, well, not too welcoming.

My fiance tells me about how some of the "southern" girls she became friends with through church who later became aware of me have pushed her into going for a "southern gentleman" who she would look good next to. She tells me about how she constantly gets grilled about dating a "Muslim" (I am not a Muslim btw) and whether she is aware of how they treat women, some of these girls are in their 20s btw. A lot of jokes about how she gets to have "711 for free" and she has told me how some of the people she has met, younger ones surprisingly, have made a lot of off hand racist comments to her about going with me.

She stopped hanging out with them and going to church but her cellphone did keep getting hit hard with texts, she blocked the #s.

I get it too, just a lot of questions and other things from guys who are our neighbors talking about "what I like about white girls so much" and "what's wrong with Indian girls?".

Being from Washington, I was not used to this sort of stuff but after being in Georgia for a little over a year, it has been eye opening.

People don't make too big of a deal out of white guys here dating interracial or black guys dating white girls but Indian guy with a blonde is definitely not okay by Atlanta standards from what I observe.

The one thing to love about the state is that unlike Washington, it is very affordable here.

Are there any other affordable areas of the USA where things are a lot less hostile? We both live in an apartment so we can definitely afford to move.

Atlanta.
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