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Old 02-13-2017, 07:39 AM
 
Location: Center City
7,528 posts, read 10,250,389 times
Reputation: 11023

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Quote:
Originally Posted by nep321 View Post
So I guess the moral of the story, based on the responses in this thread are something like this: If you're partnered and living in a small city, life is good. But if you're single and living in a small city, good luck honey.
No. The moral of the story is that if you're happy with yourself, you'll be happy anywhere. And vice versa.
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Old 02-13-2017, 07:46 AM
 
Location: Florida
11,669 posts, read 17,937,475 times
Reputation: 8239
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pine to Vine View Post
No. The moral of the story is that if you're happy with yourself, you'll be happy anywhere. And vice versa.
But that's just an old adage that's BS.

The reality is, that most gay men are unhappy living in small places. Heck, right now I live in a metro of 1.2 million and think it's too small. Even Columbus, OH was a bit too small IMO. I think in order for a gay guy to be fulfilled and happy, he must live in a metro of at least 2 million, bare minimum.
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Old 02-13-2017, 08:00 AM
 
Location: TN/NC
35,057 posts, read 31,258,424 times
Reputation: 47513
Quote:
Originally Posted by nep321 View Post
But that's just an old adage that's BS.

The reality is, that most gay men are unhappy living in small places. Heck, right now I live in a metro of 1.2 million and think it's too small. Even Columbus, OH was a bit too small IMO. I think in order for a gay guy to be fulfilled and happy, he must live in a metro of at least 2 million, bare minimum.
That's going to depend on the individual in question.

Gay men are not a monolithic block like many people expect. Yes, in rural areas and small towns, dating choices are going to be less in major metros, but other aspects of the rural/small town life may outweigh the small dating pool.

I know several gay men here, some partnered, some not, who do not want to move to a major metro area, for any number of reasons.
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Old 02-13-2017, 09:23 AM
 
Location: Florida
11,669 posts, read 17,937,475 times
Reputation: 8239
Quote:
Originally Posted by Serious Conversation View Post
That's going to depend on the individual in question.

Gay men are not a monolithic block like many people expect. Yes, in rural areas and small towns, dating choices are going to be less in major metros, but other aspects of the rural/small town life may outweigh the small dating pool.

I know several gay men here, some partnered, some not, who do not want to move to a major metro area, for any number of reasons.
True. It's a pros and cons thing. In general, I prefer small town living, but hate that there's very few other gays. And I'm not so crazy about big city living, but it's nice to have more gay options. So in other words, I guess it doesn't matter.
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Old 02-13-2017, 04:45 PM
 
Location: Cbus
1,719 posts, read 2,098,877 times
Reputation: 2148
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pine to Vine View Post
No. The moral of the story is that if you're happy with yourself, you'll be happy anywhere. And vice versa.
Are you gay?

I am perfectly happy living in a mid-sized metro where I interact with other gay people daily, have a large dating pool, and multiple gay venues. No those aren't the only factors that contribute to why I like the city I do but I know I would hate living in a city with a very limited dating pool/gay scene.
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Old 02-13-2017, 04:47 PM
 
Location: Cbus
1,719 posts, read 2,098,877 times
Reputation: 2148
Quote:
Originally Posted by nep321 View Post
But that's just an old adage that's BS.

The reality is, that most gay men are unhappy living in small places. Heck, right now I live in a metro of 1.2 million and think it's too small. Even Columbus, OH was a bit too small IMO. I think in order for a gay guy to be fulfilled and happy, he must live in a metro of at least 2 million, bare minimum.
Fyi Columbus does have 2 million people. We've discussed this before so I won't try to convince you that it's a good city to be gay in. But outside of Chicago and Minneapolis it is by far one of the best cities to be gay in the Midwest.
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Old 02-13-2017, 05:09 PM
 
Location: Center City
7,528 posts, read 10,250,389 times
Reputation: 11023
Quote:
Originally Posted by Buckeye614 View Post
Are you gay?

I am perfectly happy living in a mid-sized metro where I interact with other gay people daily, have a large dating pool, and multiple gay venues. No those aren't the only factors that contribute to why I like the city I do but I know I would hate living in a city with a very limited dating pool/gay scene.
Yes I'm gay. I'm married, older and moved to Philly. Not because of the gay scene, but because it offers the urban amenities we prefer.

There are posters in this thread who have indicated they are happy in municipalities of all sizes. The op seems to have launched this thread to validate his preconceived beliefs about this matter, and is unable to accept data that contradicts them.
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Old 02-13-2017, 05:16 PM
 
Location: Florida
11,669 posts, read 17,937,475 times
Reputation: 8239
Quote:
Originally Posted by Buckeye614 View Post
Fyi Columbus does have 2 million people. We've discussed this before so I won't try to convince you that it's a good city to be gay in. But outside of Chicago and Minneapolis it is by far one of the best cities to be gay in the Midwest.
I lived in Cbus and thought that the gay population really wasn't that large at all, despite being 2 million people. Within months, I knew just about everyone and things got stale fast.
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Old 02-13-2017, 05:19 PM
 
Location: Florida
11,669 posts, read 17,937,475 times
Reputation: 8239
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pine to Vine View Post
Yes I'm gay. I'm married, older and moved to Philly. Not because of the gay scene, but because it offers the urban amenities we prefer.

There are posters in this thread who have indicated they are happy in municipalities of all sizes. The op seems to have launched this thread to validate his preconceived beliefs about this matter, and is unable to accept data that contradicts them.
What is the data that contradicts my preconceived beliefs?
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Old 02-13-2017, 05:56 PM
 
Location: St. Louis
2,693 posts, read 3,186,336 times
Reputation: 2758
Quote:
Originally Posted by nep321 View Post
But that's just an old adage that's BS.

The reality is, that most gay men are unhappy living in small places. Heck, right now I live in a metro of 1.2 million and think it's too small. Even Columbus, OH was a bit too small IMO. I think in order for a gay guy to be fulfilled and happy, he must live in a metro of at least 2 million, bare minimum.
The dynamic of a metro area would be a lot more important than an arbitrary cut off number. Additionally knowing how cliquey the gay community in a city is also helps.

For example, I know quite a few people my age (mid-20s) who rarely go to bars that aren't in Boystown. It's kinda sad, really. To them the better part of the city isn't on their radar, let alone anywhere in the suburbs. Although I will say the suburbs aren't on my radar either. I go to Evanston occasionally, but that's about it.

Anyway, being in a bigger city is nice. Chicago has two gayborhoods and gay bars spread throughout various other neighborhoods, but smaller cities can be fine depending on certain criteria.
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