Best places for gays to live? (transplants, high crime, chapel)

[GreenGuyJ]

I just bought a house in Allentown, so I hope it's reasonably open minded since I'll be living there with my partner!

[aquaecny]

Ithaca NY has also become very gay friendly. It is small, but very diverse! Cornell and Ithaca College are there, too.

[Karen Sweazea]

Gulfport Florida is a great place for gays to live. I have lived there for three years and have met lots of happy couples and single folks too.

[mhogan10010]

Don't forget Asheville NC
The little San Fransisco of the East.

[MoMark]

Originally Posted by Still Havent Founf

what are the best cities for gays to live?

I lived in San Francisco for nine years, was extremely naive when I moved there to go to school. Of course I knew it had a high gay population, but I didn't for instance recognize Rainbow Flags as being a gay banner. I remember seeing them along Market Street and in people's windows, fluttering from private flagpoles everywhere, and I honestly thought..I wonder what African country that is?? I finally asked someone about the pretty flags and got clued in. I like gay people and I have no inhibitions about it. I find gay men generally far easier to interact and socialize with than l e s b i a n s (the word is censored here) who seem to stick to themselves and come across rather standoffish whereas gay men mingle. However, I didn't like how militant many of San Francisco's gay men are who are activist, so in-your-face and eager to test your reactions and flaunt their sexual freedom. I understood it though, most come from very conservative areas or backgrounds and have always felt so oppressed that when they find absolute freedom and acceptance, they revel in that giddy sense of freedom that comes from lifting their guards. I understand that, though I think the America of today is far less oppressive to gays than the America of 1970 or 1980 even. I am absolutely for everyone being who he or she is, and clearly San Francisco and other big cities offer freedom through anonymity and large populations of like-minded people. But I prefer people who keep their sexuality in the bedroom, both straight and gay. I don't need to see it. A man and woman swapping tonsils in public bothers me too. I think it's crass and poor manners. I think gay people who simply go about their lives living no differently than anyone else will find most parts of America absolutely fine to live in.

[chaz longue]

Originally Posted by VT Hokie 2007

Although I don't condone homosexuality, I will reiterate what someone else suggested: Dupont Circle in Washington, D.C. is like the gay Mecca of the eastern seaboard. It's a nice area, too.

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[Dragondog]

The cities of New York, L.A San Fran, Chicago, Wash D.C, Boston and other large metro areas etc will have the 'largest' gay communities. The states with the best laws for gay rights are; Vermont, DC, Connecticut, New Jersey, Rhode Island, New Hampshire, Massachusetts (in that order)

The worse states:

North Carolina -
Idaho -
Kansas
Alabama
Virginia
Mississippi
Oklahoma -

[dullnboring]

The usual staples of gay tolerance are urban cosmopolitan areas and college towns. I don't think there's any real surprises. The usual suspects of New York, San Francisco, Miami, Seattle, Los Angeles, Chicago, DC, Boston, Philadelphia, Portland, San Diego, etc. still apply and generally even more conservative cities tend to have an artsy bohemian district where there's a higher-than-average gay population. In terms of general acceptance, while not necessarily a guarantee, generally the "bluer" the state, the more accepted gays are. I think a lot of it depends on the definition of "tolerance". If you're just looking for tolerance in it's most basic forms (i.e. there being gay bars, not having your tires slashed or beaten up because you're gay) or whether or not you're in a situation where you're looking for what states/cities offer the most legal protection. As Dragondog stated, those in the Northeast are the most gay-friendly in that respect.

[pixieshmoo]

What I would like to know is why so many people in this particular forum have started off saying something like "even though I'm not gay..." or "I, myself am heterosexual, however I know that Cali. is a good place..." Who cares if you're gay or not?! The person who originally posted this thread wasn't asking if any of us were gay, he (or she, I'm sorry I don't know if the person was a male or female) was simply asking for advice on good locations for a person to live!!! Why does everyone feel they need to clarify their sexual orientation, as if we're all going to look at each other differently (this is a written forum, not a web cam, we can't see each other to judge and again, even if we could, who cares?). Whether someone AGREES with homosexuality or not, or IS gay or not, shouldn't be an issue because the question was WHERE to live.

Anyway, off the top of my head, I would also think larger cities such as NYC and SanFran. Any other places around Metropolitan areas should also be "open-minded" as well.

[chiroptera]

Originally Posted by pixieshmoo

Anyway, off the top of my head, I would also think larger cities such as NYC and SanFran. Any other places around Metropolitan areas should also be "open-minded" as well.

Actually, even cities like Flint MI are - from what I know - fine. A friend of mine has a business partner who is gay. He and his (non-business) partner own a popular downtown restaurant - a family-style place. Probably most people don't even know it's owned by a gay couple, and frankly I don't think most of the patrons would care; the place has been around for years. Another guy who owns a successful coffee shop/art gallery is a local city pillar-of-business guy; I periodically see him quoted in the paper for one thing or another as he's active in the downtown business association. He is rather "flamboyant" so it's no secret. I can think of a few other openly gay folks I know, through my business or whatever, who just go about their lives and appear successful; well employed, homeowners, and all that.
My point is, in most cities I imagine people can carve out quite nice lives for themselves without it being a big deal. There's going to be a measure of prejudice everywhere, no matter whether someone is gay, a different race than the norm, disfigured, whatever.
As to your other comment - people who are uncomfortable with something are going to make sure they're not identified as such. Come to think about it, in the thread about people in the US being overweight, I made a point about saying I'm not overweight, probably the same mechanism! My bad.
Mods, if that went astray, please feel free to edit it out.