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Old 04-16-2018, 05:42 PM
 
6 posts, read 4,412 times
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I am from NJ/NYC area and I am just so tired of apartment living. I am tired of paying $1500 a month for a one bedroom apartment. I am tired of the snow. I am tired of the crowd. Right now I work from home and have no reason to stay in this area at all. Really wanted to hear opinions on where I should go. Somewhere out west with google fiber? Could I rent a home? Should I buy a home? (not sure if I'm all that ready do to that). The idea of moving towards the mojave desert and never seeing a snowflake again sounds amazing.

What do I do? Who wants to be my life coach?
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Old 04-16-2018, 07:20 PM
 
Location: Kansas City, MISSOURI
9,013 posts, read 2,730,310 times
Reputation: 6945
I think I found the place for you

Cheap, and no snow.
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Old 04-16-2018, 08:54 PM
 
5,323 posts, read 1,995,384 times
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How old are you?
What gender are you and is dating important?
What is an acceptable rent range for you?
What is your income range?
What is your comfortable level of isolation, NYC being 0 and the middle of the Mojave being 10?
What are your general politics?

Be forewarned that rents across the US have been skyrocketing.

Without knowing any of this, my first impulse is to recommend Phoenix / Mesa / Scottsdale AZ as a comfortable transition away from NJ.

It has the weather that you want, though for a large portion of the year it will be too hot to be outside. You can likely have a sense of low density while not being isolated.

For year round perfect weather you would need to be in California. There, I would search small towns between LA and Carmel by the Sea until you found affordable rent. Though, you may not find it. You can also check Northern coastal CA (well North of the Bay Area), as well as Sacramento and Folsom.

Other suggestions, with varying degrees of success at meeting your requirements:

Tucson, AZ
Santa Fe, MN
Los Alamos, NM
Laredo, TX
Amarillo, TX
Austin, TX
Reno, NV
Mobile, AL
Asheville, NC
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Old 04-16-2018, 09:09 PM
 
45 posts, read 21,882 times
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How about Tyler, Texas? Rent first, to make sure you like it and so that you can make some friends. I found an apartment there for you:

https://www.apartments.com/quail-cre...er-tx/r27l850/

If you really insist on a house right away, I found this one for you:

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/2...70996541_zpid/

Texans are friendly and there is no state income tax. Tyler is a neat city.

Or, pack your grip and hop on Amtrak. Get off when you find a place you like.

https://www.amtrak.com/train-routes

Last edited by Katyroadpink; 04-16-2018 at 09:18 PM..
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Old 04-17-2018, 08:19 AM
 
6 posts, read 4,412 times
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by golgi1 View Post
How old are you?
What gender are you and is dating important?
What is an acceptable rent range for you?
What is your income range?
What is your comfortable level of isolation, NYC being 0 and the middle of the Mojave being 10?
What are your general politics?
I am 30 years old

I am male, dating is not important right now

I wouldn't want to pay more than what I am paying right now, which is $1500 a month. I'd really like more space such that I could keep a home office.

I have a six-figure salary

I live an isolated life already, so 10 honestly... I'd love the idea of living 2-3 hours away from LA as there are things/events there I care about but not frequent enough to live close.

No opinion towards politics

The only real stipulation I have is that I work 100% from home, so having space for a home office and solid internet service is required. The faster the better. I currently have gigabit connectivity.

actually really appreciate the suggestions, thanks

Last edited by Icanhaz; 04-17-2018 at 09:19 AM..
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Old 04-17-2018, 09:18 AM
 
5,323 posts, read 1,995,384 times
Reputation: 2987
Quote:
Originally Posted by Icanhaz View Post
I am 30 years old

I am male, dating is not important right now

I wouldn't want to pay more than what I am paying right now, which is $1500 a month. I'd really like more space such that I could keep a home office.

I have a six-figure salary

I live an isolated life already, so 10

No opinion towards politics

actually really appreciate the suggestions, thanks
Sure thing. Within those parameters, the US is your oyster.

My suggestions more or less will stay the same. Be sure to give each a hard look, as I made them somewhat carefully. Reno being the one caveat. I actually know little about it, but made it on the basis of its general location and its proximity to Tahoe. I can't necessarily say anything positive about it for lack of knowledge.

If I may, the only further suggestion that I would make is to watch the (true) isolation. You may think that you are now, and it may be okay, but if you have people around you who you speak English to on occasion then it could be worse and a bigger difference than you may think.

You can maintain a sense of space while still maintaining access to people in all of the places mentioned, and that would be my overall urgency for you. True isolation can not only be psychologically dangerous misery (I've experienced it on a couple of occasions), but its unnecessary as it is easy to gain a sense of space while not totally stranding yourself. The best type of towns to be close to are those with a walkable main street area, as those will allow for easy socializing if and when you wish to. Simply live in the suburbs of those towns, and go as far as it takes until you are comfortable.

Mountainous areas of coastal california (Northwest LA, the Southwest BAY, etc) might also offer a very nice option. Though perhaps, still too crowded for you in terms of the general area. You would only need to check rents and be wary of the forest fire danger.
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Old 04-17-2018, 10:08 AM
 
6 posts, read 4,412 times
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by golgi1 View Post
Sure thing. Within those parameters, the US is your oyster.

My suggestions more or less will stay the same. Be sure to give each a hard look, as I made them somewhat carefully. Reno being the one caveat. I actually know little about it, but made it on the basis of its general location and its proximity to Tahoe. I can't necessarily say anything positive about it for lack of knowledge.

If I may, the only further suggestion that I would make is to watch the (true) isolation. You may think that you are now, and it may be okay, but if you have people around you who you speak English to on occasion then it could be worse and a bigger difference than you may think.

You can maintain a sense of space while still maintaining access to people in all of the places mentioned, and that would be my overall urgency for you. True isolation can not only be psychologically dangerous misery (I've experienced it on a couple of occasions), but its unnecessary as it is easy to gain a sense of space while not totally stranding yourself. The best type of towns to be close to are those with a walkable main street area, as those will allow for easy socializing if and when you wish to. Simply live in the suburbs of those towns, and go as far as it takes until you are comfortable.

Mountainous areas of coastal california (Northwest LA, the Southwest BAY, etc) might also offer a very nice option. Though perhaps, still too crowded for you in terms of the general area. You would only need to check rents and be wary of the forest fire danger.
I appreciate the input, I'll do research on the locations you listed. As for isolation, yeah, you are right. 100% true isolation would drive anyone crazy- it's not something I am actively seeking. It's just that, for example, I am only two train stops away from NYC but I have no reason or desire to go into the city and have not for over a year. So why am I paying so much rent to be so close to a major city I don't commute to or do anything in? On top of that I am a bit stressed from apartment living. I would really like the space to be able to not have to be considerate to my neighbors- why I wonder if renting a house is right for me. That made me think- there are places in this country where the houses aren't five feet away from each other- why am I settling for this? Of course that makes me think if I should be buying a home instead of constantly renting, but I am not sure I am ready for the level of commitment required with being a home owner.

The more I looked around NJ/NYC itself the more I realized my options for the above criteria were lacking. I started looking at PA... Then I thought, well, why not further? Why not anywhere in the country? Now is the perfect time given my employment that I could make such a move. I am really only starting this journey of discovery and I am doing my best to learn everything I can to have a broader scope of my options.

Thanks again for the help.
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Old 04-17-2018, 10:15 AM
 
5,323 posts, read 1,995,384 times
Reputation: 2987
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katyroadpink View Post
How about Tyler, Texas? Rent first, to make sure you like it and so that you can make some friends.
Also quite a good suggestion.

The only caveat being that Texas is among the hottest, flattest states. So, if year round good weather or outdoor recreation is terribly important, consider that when looking at Texas. But Texas generally gets an A for people, taxes, and cost of living.

I thought of something else. Maps are a good starting point for planning a move, to include mental health and happiness maps. The latter qualification can be somewhat nebulous, but regardless I'll post those that I generally look at below:

http://www.city-data.com/blog/wp-con...06/figure2.png

https://www.vox.com/2014/7/24/593156...ces-in-america

radicalcartography

The above map I consider to be a basic reflection of a combination of poverty and isolation.
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Old 04-17-2018, 10:29 AM
 
Location: New Mexico
6,558 posts, read 3,656,219 times
Reputation: 12325
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katyroadpink View Post

Or, pack your grip and hop on Amtrak. Get off when you find a place you like.

https://www.amtrak.com/train-routes
Get off the train at Albuquerque and drive a few miles to the northwest to Rio Rancho, sometimes jokingly called Little New York. It's the 3rd largest city in a state (a state with only 2 million people). Santa Fe is an hour north by commuter train or interstate. Albuquerque is across the river. Six figures will give you the pick of most houses or apartments. You can buy a nice house with a little acreage for well under $300k. Climate is perfect. This is the high desert...humidity was 5% yesterday. Four seasons but with almost no snow except on the mountains. At this elevation (5500') summers are mild with hottest temps in June and rarely over 100. Lots to do outdoors but bring your sunscreen.
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Old 04-17-2018, 10:45 AM
 
5,323 posts, read 1,995,384 times
Reputation: 2987
Quote:
Originally Posted by Icanhaz View Post
I appreciate the input, I'll do research on the locations you listed. As for isolation, yeah, you are right. 100% true isolation would drive anyone crazy- it's not something I am actively seeking. It's just that, for example, I am only two train stops away from NYC but I have no reason or desire to go into the city and have not for over a year. So why am I paying so much rent to be so close to a major city I don't commute to or do anything in? On top of that I am a bit stressed from apartment living..
Gotcha, and that makes total sense. I have similar views, and frankly didn't commute into Manhattan when I lived in Brooklyn last year. I am now in Philadelphia and about to move to central PA for the exact same reasons that you are looking to move, though I am looking for more socialization as a result rather than less.

High population areas have a strange reverse social effect where people keep to themselves more. In addition, most townships are planned for cars instead of walking. We are meant to drive to the stores and restaurants, and then drive home. Its incredibly inhuman and isolating. I'm a large proponent of bringing back Main Street. which can mostly be found only in older towns as legacy planning.

I'm going to go ahead and assume that you really don't want isolation, and that more of a social life would improve your quality of life like it would most. You are merely resigned to it. If I may, I think that you should take that into account when looking. I'm not talking about North Jersey or NYC style social life, but a normal circle of friends and options for dating. Friends for seeing summer concerts in the park and other activities. That sort of thing. You can still have it. Look to live in town for your first year to make those connections.

The only issue with home renting is filling them with furniture. Try AirBnB for a long term furnished home rental to try it out before you rent a house that you have to furnish. It'll also allow you to move with less commitment and expense in terms of furniture.

Personally, I found that we spread out and fill the space allotted to us, and so more square footage isn't always great for a single person. Though, finding a smaller home to rent is possible in some areas and I do like having personal outdoor space.

Keep in mind the the population drops severely as soon as the moisture line stops in the mid-West, roughly halfway through Kansas and Nebraska. After that point, the only significant rural population will be around towns and cities. Whereas East of that line there are people generally everywhere.

So, in conclusion, I think that you simply need to get away from and destress from North Jersey. I've been in the same boat. You can go far, but the West is definitely a double edged sword in terms of both population and dryness/heat and sometimes elevation. I did have a friend move to Phoenix and not come back. Certain people love it out there for the friendliness, nature access in some places, weather and cost of living in some places. Certain people hate it for the conservative nature, heat, relative lack of culture, etc. Repeat in varying degrees for every town out there.

You can go far, but I would also offer that close may also offer something. For instance, Northwest NJ is very rural and does not suffer from poverty. Central PA can offer that small town feel in some places and a cheap cost of living. Northwest VA probably has one of the highest quality of life ratios in the country, as does Charlotesville. Southern Alabama is relaxed, warm, friendly, and cheap. Ohio people are so down to earth that I've known several people to choose it over anywhere else. Etc. And there are innumerable small towns that would give you your space in all.

Good luck!
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