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Old 07-30-2009, 10:38 PM
 
10,167 posts, read 17,119,597 times
Reputation: 5742

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Quote:
Originally Posted by TANaples View Post
Ok, now on to southern men. I am NOT your sugar, sweeheart, honey, or young lady (at 60).
I guess we Southern men are now being lectured...by a person who disdains the South, but moved to, and lives in it. I swear to gawd...I will never understand it. It has to be a yankee thing, because there is no other way to explain it....

Ok, the "endearments" like honey, and darlin' and sugar? It simply reflects the easy and friendly and bonding way we Southerners get along with each other. Male and female. Its use is affectionate. Or just easily friendly. Not sexist. It so very much expresses in everyday exchanges, our natural attachement to one another. Like family, in so many ways.

But ok, maybe it IS only something another Southerner can understand. I forgive you for that part of it, as you are not one of us. And have made that clear and make a point to keep doing so.

In fact, I even feel sorry for you. I really do. That is, in the sense, that you can feel nothing, feel no part at all, of a region, which welcomes you, but all you can do is find fault with.

*AHEM* But back to the honey, darling, etc, etc, thing?

I doubt any would use that those terms if they knew you and how you feel about the South. No biggie, really. It doesn't matter in the whole scheme of things.

At the same time, I will continue to use the those endearments -- and I emphasize ENDEARMENTS -- all the time in the casual encounters -- with the most wonderful women and best mannered ladies in the world. That is to say, Southern.

So if we should encounter in a social situation? I let "hon" slip out? I hope you will forgive me as just a trying to be polite Southern male who didn't know your yankee hang-ups and underlying disdain for the South.

At the same time? I will use all those words with Southern ladies. Especially in those good-smelling cafes, which stretch all the way from Texas to Virginia...and those waitresses who say something like:

"You want some more tea, darlin?

And we say:

Sure do, thanks, hon...

THAT is Southern. And I am so sorry you will never be a part of it....cos of your own choices...
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Old 07-30-2009, 11:54 PM
 
Location: OKIE-Ville
5,412 posts, read 7,711,457 times
Reputation: 3054
Quote:
Originally Posted by TexasReb View Post
I guess we Southern men are now being lectured...by a person who disdains the South, but moved to, and lives in it. I swear to gawd...I will never understand it. It has to be a yankee thing, because there is no other way to explain it....

Ok, the "endearments" like honey, and darlin' and sugar? It simply reflects the easy and friendly and bonding way we Southerners get along with each other. Male and female. Its use is affectionate. Or just easily friendly. Not sexist. It so very much expresses in everyday exchanges, our natural attachement to one another. Like family, in so many ways.

But ok, maybe it IS only something another Southerner can understand. I forgive you for that part of it, as you are not one of us. And have made that clear and make a point to keep doing so.

In fact, I even feel sorry for you. I really do. That is, in the sense, that you can feel nothing, feel no part at all, of a region, which welcomes you, but all you can do is find fault with.

*AHEM* But back to the honey, darling, etc, etc, thing?

I doubt any would use that those terms if they knew you and how you feel about the South. No biggie, really. It doesn't matter in the whole scheme of things.

At the same time, I will continue to use the those endearments -- and I emphasize ENDEARMENTS -- all the time in the casual encounters -- with the most wonderful women and best mannered ladies in the world. That is to say, Southern.

So if we should encounter in a social situation? I let "hon" slip out? I hope you will forgive me as just a trying to be polite Southern male who didn't know your yankee hang-ups and underlying disdain for the South.

At the same time? I will use all those words with Southern ladies. Especially in those good-smelling cafes, which stretch all the way from Texas to Virginia...and those waitresses who say something like:

"You want some more tea, darlin?

And we say:

Sure do, thanks, hon...

THAT is Southern. And I am so sorry you will never be a part of it....cos of your own choices...
I'm with ya here on this one, Friend.

I don't know why that is so odd for some women to hear something nice and pleasant from someone else....I call my wife's friends "Sweetie" without even thinking about it. Lordy, I know with all the junk our ladies hear/deal with throughout the day, they think it's nice to hear something gentle and encouraging. It's just part of the culture here in these parts (OK/TX/AR) and a very tender/honoring way to relate to the opposite sex if you ask me.

It's a mystery to me why some Northern/Western/Eastern/ Midwestern women would struggle with this? Any Northern/Western/Eastern/Midwestern women that can shed some light on this for us? Do ya'll view this as portraying females as weak/frail or something?

I'm sad to say that with each passing year it seems more and more acceptable to disrespect women in our country (especially in the North, West, East, and Midwest) and hence, they get hardened to men that want to nurture them.

As for me, I'll take after my elderly Daddy who still stands in honor of my mom when she enters the room. That's the kinda chivalry that still exists in the South. I don't know if it's anywhere else.
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Old 07-31-2009, 12:23 AM
 
Location: Germantown, MD
1,359 posts, read 3,277,783 times
Reputation: 569
Quote:
Originally Posted by KeyserSoze View Post
I question your intelligence and your taste in comedy if you believe stereotypes at all, especially in media which purposely promotes them for "entertainment" value.
There is no person on the face of the earth that does not believe in some stereotype to a degree. Both films exploited people (not just Southerners, although they were the focus for half of both films), but they were set up to show their "true colors."
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Old 07-31-2009, 05:50 AM
 
Location: Kentucky
6,749 posts, read 19,955,891 times
Reputation: 2129
I was just called "sweetheart" by a man from Los Angeles yesterday so it isn't just a Southern thing, just much MORE Southern I call people honey, sweetie and other people's kids baby all the time and have yet to make someone mad about it.
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Old 07-31-2009, 07:16 AM
 
259 posts, read 324,144 times
Reputation: 75
Quote:
Originally Posted by missymomof3 View Post
I was just called "sweetheart" by a man from Los Angeles yesterday so it isn't just a Southern thing, just much MORE Southern I call people honey, sweetie and other people's kids baby all the time and have yet to make someone mad about it.

It certainly isnt southern, I hear all kinds of northerners calling people hun, sweety etc.
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Old 07-31-2009, 08:38 AM
 
Location: Atlanta
7,732 posts, read 12,155,742 times
Reputation: 2774
Quote:
Originally Posted by TexasReb View Post
I guess we Southern men are now being lectured...by a person who disdains the South, but moved to, and lives in it. I swear to gawd...I will never understand it. It has to be a yankee thing, because there is no other way to explain it....

Ok, the "endearments" like honey, and darlin' and sugar? It simply reflects the easy and friendly and bonding way we Southerners get along with each other. Male and female. Its use is affectionate. Or just easily friendly. Not sexist. It so very much expresses in everyday exchanges, our natural attachement to one another. Like family, in so many ways.

But ok, maybe it IS only something another Southerner can understand. I forgive you for that part of it, as you are not one of us. And have made that clear and make a point to keep doing so.

In fact, I even feel sorry for you. I really do. That is, in the sense, that you can feel nothing, feel no part at all, of a region, which welcomes you, but all you can do is find fault with.

*AHEM* But back to the honey, darling, etc, etc, thing?

I doubt any would use that those terms if they knew you and how you feel about the South. No biggie, really. It doesn't matter in the whole scheme of things.

At the same time, I will continue to use the those endearments -- and I emphasize ENDEARMENTS -- all the time in the casual encounters -- with the most wonderful women and best mannered ladies in the world. That is to say, Southern.

So if we should encounter in a social situation? I let "hon" slip out? I hope you will forgive me as just a trying to be polite Southern male who didn't know your yankee hang-ups and underlying disdain for the South.

At the same time? I will use all those words with Southern ladies. Especially in those good-smelling cafes, which stretch all the way from Texas to Virginia...and those waitresses who say something like:

"You want some more tea, darlin?

And we say:

Sure do, thanks, hon...

THAT is Southern. And I am so sorry you will never be a part of it....cos of your own choices...
ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL post, Randy!

Yes, I too will continue to do this on a daily basis as I interact with the wonderful Southern ladies I encounter.

I can tell it makes her day when I refer to my 73 years young next door neighbor as sweetie. Her eyes actually sparkle.

Some people simply don't get it, and sadly - probably never will.
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Old 07-31-2009, 08:41 AM
 
Location: Atlanta
7,732 posts, read 12,155,742 times
Reputation: 2774
Quote:
Originally Posted by missymomof3 View Post
I was just called "sweetheart" by a man from Los Angeles yesterday so it isn't just a Southern thing, just much MORE Southern I call people honey, sweetie and other people's kids baby all the time and have yet to make someone mad about it.
To turn this around Missy, I was in L.A. over Memorial Day and tried this on a couple of the locals out there.

They may have been faking it (don't think so), but the only reaction I received was nothing but delight (and giggles from one Asian girl at a gas station in Santa Monica!)
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Old 07-31-2009, 01:08 PM
 
542 posts, read 1,288,936 times
Reputation: 349
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpterp View Post
There is no person on the face of the earth that does not believe in some stereotype to a degree. Both films exploited people (not just Southerners, although they were the focus for half of both films), but they were set up to show their "true colors."
I don't believe in any stereotypes. But I guess when it exploits Southerners, it's somewhat okay.
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Old 07-31-2009, 01:47 PM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC
3,562 posts, read 4,962,474 times
Reputation: 1491
Quote:
Originally Posted by zonababe View Post
Baby beauty pageants are pretty popular is the South. Big hair on little baby girls is just sick and wrong!

And the most popular beauty pageant kid was from Colorado.
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Old 07-31-2009, 01:49 PM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC
3,562 posts, read 4,962,474 times
Reputation: 1491
Quote:
Originally Posted by Visvaldis View Post
In the city I live, Major League Baseball rates 3rd page in the sports section. By surprise the recent perfect game by a White Sox pitcher was remarkable enough for a front page story. The first two pages are dedicated to football and basketball (usually college), even though neither is in season at this time.

Could it be that I done made those mistakes intentionally?

What city? That is probably the reason why.
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