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Old 04-18-2007, 09:37 AM
 
3,042 posts, read 8,088,354 times
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the midwest and the South east are great. Atlanta, Charlotte, Charleston, Nashville, Virginia beach, Ohio, Minnesota, Missouri, Kansas,
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Old 04-18-2007, 05:55 PM
 
Location: Southern California
3,455 posts, read 7,298,838 times
Reputation: 1410
I always thought the Alaska thing was just a stereotype! Like the show men in trees!?!?

I dont know....but its worth a thought! Sounds like an adventure!
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Old 04-18-2007, 06:10 PM
 
Location: NE Florida
9,362 posts, read 22,798,111 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rgb123 View Post
I always thought the Alaska thing was just a stereotype! Like the show men in trees!?!?

I dont know....but its worth a thought! Sounds like an adventure!
I just tried to check match.com for Alaska, but there were too many hoops to go through to just look. Yes, a site visit may be in order...
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Old 04-18-2007, 11:04 PM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
15,595 posts, read 35,275,513 times
Reputation: 14699
Forget men in trees! We get alot of folks (ladies) in the Alaska Forum...ranting and raving about "men in tree's". Actually I've never seen the show...but the few Alaska ladies in the forum swear it is nothing like real Alaska. They highly recommend not comparing that show with Alaska life.
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Old 04-19-2007, 12:31 AM
 
60 posts, read 47,113 times
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Thanks to all for the feedback on this topic, especially you, rgb123. I was surprised to see your 'thumbs-down' assessment of dating in Chicago.

I visited the Windy City a few months ago and was pleasantly surprised at how friendly everyone was -- especially as my visit took place on a week when the temperatures were below zero. In fact, I came away from my visit thinking that the motto for Chicago could be: "New York City Without The Attitude'.

TwinkleToes, you said, "You can find a mate anywhere. It all depends on what you are open to and how you present yourself to other people. Have you checked out any online dating sites? If not, you should try that and be very specific and picky about what you are looking for. When you least expect it and in a place you don't think you're going to find anyone, you just might meet Mr. Right!"

Unfortunately, I have to disagree with you. I lived for six months in a large English-speaking city in Asia a few years ago and it quickly became apparent that my dating opportunities there would be nil. It was amusing to see how few Western women (women from the U.S., the U.K., Australia, Western Europe) lived in this city, because their dating lives just ground to a halt there. Asian men were too shy/introverted (?) to date Western women, but Asian women practically lined up to date the Western guys there.

Even in the U.S., there are places where dating is more difficult than just presenting oneself well and hoping for the best. 15 years ago, I moved from the St. Louis area to Washington, D.C. for a job. I went from a fairly normal dating scene in St. Louis to a wretched one in D.C. The motto that 'if a guy is over 30 and not married in D.C.' is very true. And 15 years later, a lot of guys are more overt about just looking for 'Friends With Benefits' and one-night stands. Ick.

And yes, I've tried online dating sites -- and for some people they've been very beneficial. Sadly, when I have posted a profile on dating sites, I've had to state in my profile that "If you're married, engaged or in a committed relationship, please do not contact me." And the number of respondents to my ad just plummets. Isn't that sad?

And to AussieMale, let me share with you the characteristics of my last date, whom I met at a singles dance: He's 53, divorced, living in his parents' basement, college-degreed but working as a maintenance man at a motel, angry at the world and constantly ranting about his ex-wife (my heart goes out to this poor woman for marrying him in the first place).

Even though I suggested he get help for his 'issues' and told him I don't want to see him, he still calls my house several times a day and hangs up when I don't answer. (I've taken to screening his calls via my answering machine.) If that makes me picky, then I will happily be picky and alone the rest of my life rather than put up with a nutjob like him.

Anyway, this is not a poor-me rant, nor is it a reason for people to stay in a marriage or relationship because they're afraid of 'what's out there'. A very good female friend of mine met a nice guy here in my hometown when she was 59 and he was 75, and they've been happily married for five years and dated five years before they married.

I'm just looking to put the odds in my favor regarding getting married. I've visited a couple sites like Moderator cut: linking to competitors sites is not allowed which has information on single men vs. single women in each county in the continental U.S.

I've also googled phrases like 'San Francisco dating blog' and 'Chicago dating blog' to see if anyone has blogged on this particular subject, and can offer insights on what makes their city great or awful for dating.

Articles like 'Best cities for Singles' are just too ambiguous. For example, the best cities for single women aren't necessarily the best cities for gay single men.

Anyway, many thanks to all who have or would like to weigh in on this subject and have some insight to share. With the astoundingly high number of singles in this nation, I'm sure someone has some info that will benefit all of us singles looking to 'get attached'.

Last edited by Yac; 01-08-2008 at 04:03 AM..
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Old 04-19-2007, 04:01 AM
 
Location: Hell
606 posts, read 533,705 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LivingSingle123 View Post
Thanks to all for the feedback on this topic, especially you, rgb123. I was surprised to see your 'thumbs-down' assessment of dating in Chicago.

Unfortunately, I have to disagree with you. I lived for six months in a large English-speaking city in Asia a few years ago and it quickly became apparent that my dating opportunities there would be nil. It was amusing to see how few Western women (women from the U.S., the U.K., Australia, Western Europe) lived in this city, because their dating lives just ground to a halt there. Asian men were too shy/introverted (?) to date Western women, but Asian women practically lined up to date the Western guys there.
Asian males generally hold the point of view that white females don't want asian males.
by the way,there are a lot of western women living in asian cities like Hongkong or something.
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Old 04-19-2007, 08:34 AM
 
Location: Southern California
3,455 posts, read 7,298,838 times
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Hi Living Single!

Well, I would bet that Chicago is better than NYC or DC so you probably did notice an improvement. I think if you come here, keep your eyes open for a younger guy and what is wrong with that? My experience is that older men are less okay with independent women and more okay with lying and cheating, also more likey to be married or not quite yet divorced. (that is very sad about what happened with your online profile....have you tried eharmony? Ive still had to weed through some schmoes but its much better than the guys who are attracted to sites where they can just browse it like a catalog looking for their favorite pictures)

Here, in chicago the stats are in the guys favor and my experience has been that consciously or not, the guys take advantage of it -- cosmo (not my trusted source for information, but still I had to agree or at least wonder if its not better somewhere else) did an issue with the worst places for dating....Chicago was at the top and it said that this is the capital for the kinds of guys that break up with you by never calling you again...I posted that on the chicago board and a guy actually wrote "yeah I am one of those guys, its cause I dont want to hurt anyones feelings" wow....I could not even respond.

I lived in minnesota for awhile, and everyone over 25 was married. I think there is some of that in Chicago...at least most people are married by 30. Definitley not everyone but it seems hard to find a nice guy who is not married that is also not somone that has taken advantage of the anonymity of the big city to both meet and break up with a lot of women....never developing real relationships or relationship skills.

I met one group of guys in chicago that told me they were having a divorce party. later they said, oh its not really a divorce party we just said that so you would talk to us. I was like huh? so...you think having a divorce party is sexy? does that mean your still married or that your single then? what?

I was very confused, and actually that was probably the last time I went out in the city!

It seems like the nicest people I meet in Chicago are actually from somewhere else. I spend more time in the suburbs, where there are a lot of nice people....but not a lot of single ones.

Anyway, I think you could have better luck here than me, I just thought I should offer my experience! I do think it would be better than the east coast, though I would bet people get married here just a bit younger too....
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Old 04-19-2007, 02:53 PM
 
1,025 posts, read 3,764,938 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LivingSingle123 View Post
I'm a 40-year-old, never married woman with no children who is planning to relocate for economic reasons (I need a better job). I'd also like to move somewhere where my chances of getting married are above average.

While the general consensus is that the East Coast cities, like New York and Washington D.C., are awful for women and the West Coast cities are great, I've been told that West Coast cities like LA and San Francisco are nightmares when it comes to finding a sane, levelheaded guy.
LivingSingle, you might want to consider Charlotte, NC (as someone has mentioned already).

Here's why (an over-40 single female shortage there?) : Female friends in Charlotte?



"Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match..."
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Old 04-19-2007, 03:02 PM
 
Location: Louisiana
45 posts, read 206,598 times
Reputation: 32
Someone said Texas, that's funny. I think prettier people are down south. I myself live in the south, LA actually. I would go to any major city. Finding a job would be easier fo royu and pay is probaly better in the bigger cities. Also ding ding ding more people! I dunno about those websites...Depends what kind of person you are I guess. Some people like that kind of thing. I just would have a hard time trusting people I don't now or have seen for a relationship. Don't sell yourself short and put your career first!
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Old 04-19-2007, 03:03 PM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
15,595 posts, read 35,275,513 times
Reputation: 14699
I wonder if they will create a singles forum within C-D someday. Hmmmm...
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