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Old 04-20-2007, 04:56 PM
8,317 posts, read 25,840,928 times
Reputation: 9133


I am going to comment as a divorced middle-aged guy who can feel your frustration with the "dating" scene. I would agree with some other posts that the Rocky Mountain/Intermountain states might be a good place for you to look. First, there are more men than women in the Rocky Mountain/Intermountain region, so that's in your favor. Second, contrary to popular belief, the region is not just populated with gun-toting rednecks, though there are some very nice people in that group. There are lots of nice folks out here. I admit--I'm a Western native and I'm somewhat partial.

I read your "expectations" and let me comment on those from the "male" point of view. Chances are, most middle-aged guys you will meet anywhere are probably going to be divorced or widowed. You comment about your mate being able to support "your kids." You say you don't have any, so the inference is that you would like to have or adopt children. That's a turn-off for a lot of middle-age single guys. They either have already done the child-rearing thing, or they had no desire to do it to begin with. Some of them (rightfully so) are still paying support for their children from an earlier marriage. Most middle-aged guys are also into trying to get structured financially for retirement. So, marrying a woman who they perceive to be "high-maintenance" (I don't think you fall into this group, from what you said in your post) can also be a turn-off. I've seen a lot of middle-age guys who go out and marry their "trophy" wife--it seems many of them wind up divorced (surprise?) and broke to boot. No thanks.

I think that middle-aged men who truly want to find a new mate (hopefully for life) do tend to get pretty picky. They've seen the gold-diggers and the rejects from umpteen failed relationships ("Why has she been married five times?"). Then there's that old societal stigma, "Well, if she never was married and has no children, there must be something wrong with her." I don't usually buy that one, but I have seen a few women who would cause me to ask myself that question.

As to the "liberal" thing, I wouldn't worry too much about that. I happen to be a moderate conservative who has always lived in some very conservative areas. Some of my best friends are arch-conservative and some are very liberal. In my life, I haved dated both, and quite a few in between. What I dislike is hedonism and phoniness, and--unfortunately--there is plenty of that on all sides of the political spectrum these days.

If you are as you say you are in your post, I wouldn't think that you would have much problem finding a guy to settle down with wherever you might relocate. For an awful lot of guys, you would be considered a breath of fresh air. Good luck!
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Old 04-20-2007, 06:26 PM
Location: Mayberry
32,058 posts, read 13,085,230 times
Reputation: 68568
I live in Mt. Airy, NC for God's sake. I had one date last year that left a 1.00 tip on a 24.00 ticket. I was so embarrassed, I went back and gave the waitress a 5. It's pitiful here!! I mean really, tobacco chewin', no teeth, etc, etc. OK, no exaggeration, but maybe too general, I don't want to offend any of the good ol' boys. There are plenty of wonderful people here. There are great cities here for a single person, like Charlotte or Lake Norman!!
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Old 04-20-2007, 08:18 PM
1,025 posts, read 3,764,788 times
Reputation: 634
Another thread was born from this one (didn't want to lose that entertaining side conversation, so those posts have their own thread now found here)!

Remember that the topic of this thread is: "Best cities for women to find a mate & get married"!
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Old 04-24-2007, 12:09 PM
Location: Charlotte, NC
9 posts, read 30,518 times
Reputation: 13
Next time you are in Charlotte..............

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Old 04-24-2007, 04:03 PM
Location: Jersey City
6,488 posts, read 16,148,250 times
Reputation: 5632
I don't know how East Coast cities are "horrible for women." If you're career-oriented I think you can become a very powerful woman in the major cities. But, getting married and having children is usually not the #1 priority among many EC women. If you go to a more old-fashioned place I think it would be much easier. Case in point, one of my friends (very career-driven, independent woman) decided she was sick of NJ and wanted to go back to her hometown in Wisconsin. She moved and within five months she was engaged and pregnant!

I think it's probably easier to get married and have kids if you are in an environment where women are expected to get married and have kids.
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Old 04-27-2007, 07:45 PM
1,025 posts, read 3,764,788 times
Reputation: 634
Here is the answer!

According to a recent Men’s Health magazine article, here are
the Top Five Cities where women age 35+ can find the most
eligible bachelors:

1. San Jose, California

2. Salt Lake City, Utah

3. Arlington, Texas

4. Raleigh, North Carolina

5. San Francisco, California

Here's the rest of the top 25:

6. Fremont, CA
7. Austin, TX
8. Minneapolis, MN
9. Washington, DC
10. San Diego, CA
11. Charlotte, NC
12. Dallas, TX
13. Denver, CO
14. St. Paul, MN
15. Seattle, WA
16. Houston, TX
17. New York, NY
18. Madison, WI
19. Fort Worth, TX
20. Durham, NC
21. Anchorage, AK
22. Oakland, CA
23. Honolulu, HI
24. Columbia, SC
25. Los Angeles, CA

...and an interactive map: HERE
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Old 05-06-2007, 07:59 PM
Location: Venice, FL
19 posts, read 52,528 times
Reputation: 11
Talking Packed and ready!


I am so serious!! I am 32, single and ready to move!! Where are the men? I want to go East and to water. If you girls need a roomie or a friend in a new city, get ahold of me.... let's go!!!
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Old 05-07-2007, 12:24 AM
Location: Renton, WA
579 posts, read 1,146,667 times
Reputation: 473
Originally Posted by LivingSingle123 View Post
I'd like to live someplace fairly liberal, affordable and friendly. Additionally the four seasons don't bother me too, too much. I've been looking at moving to the Chicago area, so I'd appreciate any feedback on that area that you may have.
The Phoenix area may be a good choice. It is affordable with a strong economy and relatively liberal (the governor of AZ is a liberal, Democratic single woman in her late 40's, and all of my local legislators and my U.S. Congressman are Democrats). If you consider how people vote with their feet, then the Phoenix appears to be a better area than Chicago because more people move from the Chicago area to the Phoenix area than vice versa.

Moderator cut: manual signatures not permitted
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Old 05-14-2007, 10:03 PM
1,267 posts, read 3,036,258 times
Reputation: 191
It's no secret that CO has AK in it's sights when it comes to male to female ratios. Even Denver has one of the more favorable ratios for women looking to meet men. It would be interesting to see what the breakdown is by age group and orientation. Either way, Denver has more than enough men for every woman (and probably plenty of level headed/sane professional men with the health to climb a mountain at that), and Boulder has even more (one of the most male heavy cities in the country). Some places have good odds with odd goods, though I suspect that's not the case with things here in Denver/Boulder. To be honest, I'm not exactly sure why it's so male heavy around here in a such a large population, other than the possibility that it attracts a lot of people that are willing to leave friends and family behind for lifestyle, and maybe more men are willing to do that than women?
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Old 05-14-2007, 10:26 PM
Location: Southern California
3,455 posts, read 7,298,090 times
Reputation: 1410
hmmm....and I was leaning toward making a move to colorado!!! good to know!

personally, I think men are just attracted to the outdoors. could it be that simple?

luckily, I am too
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