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Old 01-28-2019, 01:13 PM
 
Location: Reno, NV
1,518 posts, read 704,421 times
Reputation: 1953

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Quote:
Originally Posted by TANaples View Post
I have travelled from the east coast to the west coast, and around Europe. I spent my summers as a child in the midwest. I lived in Florida for a short time as a young adult, although not because I particularly wanted to move there.

When you are born and raised in NYC and/or live very near it, why move anywhere else? Besides, what are vacations for?
IIRC, people from large cities are statistically more likely to move, not less.

I don't know that the average person from a big city would "need" to live somewhere else, but when you're exposed to different immigrant groups, more people from elsewhere, and a greater variety of architecture and population densities, that can make you more curious about living other places - and people in big cities are more likely to be educated and taking the kinds of jobs that require relocation.

Edit: Okay, I looked it up, and it looks like there's no correlation between population density of a state and the percentage of people born there who stay there. But at least there doesn't appear to be anything major keeping big-city natives tethered there.

https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/...were-born.html

Last edited by TheTimidBlueBars; 01-28-2019 at 02:08 PM..
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Old 01-29-2019, 11:08 AM
 
Location: Cleveland, OH
1,234 posts, read 636,323 times
Reputation: 740
Quote:
Originally Posted by bjimmy24 View Post
There is absolutely nothing wrong with living somewhere because your family and friends live there. I don't understand the glorification of being a transient atomized individual trotting around the country every few years to form superficial friendships of convenience. It's all very boring and vapid.
It's funny that this is coming from a transient lol. IMO, it's people glorify being transients because they're insecure with their own lives or an ego thing. Plus, some people blame their respective cities for why they're not where they want to be in life instead of looking at themselves and trying to rectify the situation. Also, some people feel if you like living in your hometown (especially if it's not one of the "cool" places) then you haven't travel that much or haven't had much exposure outside of their hometown. Another question for you: why do you some people tie their self-worth into cities?

Last edited by QCongress83216; 01-29-2019 at 12:37 PM..
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Old 01-29-2019, 12:07 PM
 
485 posts, read 659,472 times
Reputation: 662
Quote:
Originally Posted by ducksburg View Post
maybe they just don't want to leave since the city is good enough
I was born in Houston and lived here my whole life!

I've never had any desire to leave... I even "went away" to college, in Houston.
In fact, I watch a 1,000,000 new people relocate here every decade. And they come from all over the world and bring their culture with them and together we add it to our local culture and continue to create this unique "Houston Cultural Family". We have pro sports teams, world class museums, resident performing arts, a great food scene, year round outdoor activities....

I'm in the 'city building' industry and every day here is more exciting than the last so this is definitely a great place for me. It's not that I don't venture out or see the rest of the world...I travel, I studied abroad..there is just no reason for me to relocate. I'm actually grateful I was born here and have a chance to contribute to its growth.

Why pay 3 times as much to live in a cracker box in NYC or SF...they are both only a few hours away by plane. I can visit whenever I want.
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Old 01-30-2019, 11:50 AM
 
9,519 posts, read 13,439,344 times
Reputation: 5692
Quote:
Originally Posted by dreamofmonterey View Post
I was going to use a specific area, but then figured everyone would have pros or cons. Why (or why not) did you stay in the same city, what was it and where?
Outside NYC on LI. Besides a few stints elsewhere for school, I've lived here all my life. I love it and I stay b/c of my family and the job opportunities, mostly but I really do love it. Huge variety of everything I love and amazing people, food, within the shadow of NYC it's awesome here.


Anywhere I wanna visit, I visit. I don't feel the need to live anywhere else.
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Old 01-30-2019, 12:18 PM
 
Location: Mars City
5,091 posts, read 2,139,636 times
Reputation: 7505
The myth that staying put is bad is = the myth that one must move to be happy/fulfilled.
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Old 01-30-2019, 12:28 PM
 
Location: The middle of nowhere
8,961 posts, read 4,103,404 times
Reputation: 7645
Quote:
Originally Posted by QCongress83216 View Post
It's funny that this is coming from a transient lol. IMO, it's people glorify being transients because they're insecure with their own lives or an ego thing. Plus, some people blame their respective cities for why they're not where they want to be in life instead of looking at themselves and trying to rectify the situation. Also, some people feel if you like living in your hometown (especially if it's not one of the "cool" places) then you haven't travel that much or haven't had much exposure outside of their hometown. Another question for you: why do you some people tie their self-worth into cities?
I'm currently stuck living in my hometown and I really despise it. It's too small, conservative, cookie cutter, boring, ugly, three hours from a "real" city, etc, etc, etc. I also fight feeling like a failure because I still live here. I did get to spend three wonderful years in a mid-sized city on the east coast after college though and am very thankful for those years but moving back to my hometown was one of the worst things I ever did. Now I'm pretty much stuck because after you are established, it's extremely difficult to move unless you do something drastic. I wonder if people who tie their self-worth into cities grew up in places that are perceived as being backwaters?
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Old 01-30-2019, 01:06 PM
 
Location: Cleveland, OH
1,234 posts, read 636,323 times
Reputation: 740
Quote:
Originally Posted by bawac34618 View Post
I'm currently stuck living in my hometown and I really despise it. It's too small, conservative, cookie cutter, boring, ugly, three hours from a "real" city, etc, etc, etc. I also fight feeling like a failure because I still live here. I did get to spend three wonderful years in a mid-sized city on the east coast after college though and am very thankful for those years but moving back to my hometown was one of the worst things I ever did. Now I'm pretty much stuck because after you are established, it's extremely difficult to move unless you do something drastic. I wonder if people who tie their self-worth into cities grew up in places that are perceived as being backwaters?
IMO, you're going off what people or the media say about smaller cities. I battled with that for a long time with my feelings of living in Cleveland. I had to learn to balance out the pros and cons; you'll have to do the same thing whether you stay in your current city or move somewhere else. But, you're not a failure because you're still living in your hometown. You're only a failure if you let other define you instead of you defining you. Happiness and success is based on the person not in the city you live in. Just because you live in a "cool city" doesn't make you cool, and just because you live in an "uncool city" doesn't make you uncool. There are some people in "cool city" that want to move because of cost of living is getting too expensive. If you move to a different city, do it because it's the best decision for you, not because you feel like you'll be in with the cool crowd.

Last edited by QCongress83216; 01-30-2019 at 01:34 PM..
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Old 01-30-2019, 01:19 PM
 
4,480 posts, read 2,663,831 times
Reputation: 4085
There's nothing wrong with staying put.

The idea that you have to move to succeed does have some basis though, depending on how you define success and where you come from. You can do great things in a small town, but you can't realistically rise to the top of most fields in most towns.
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Old 01-30-2019, 01:29 PM
 
9,519 posts, read 13,439,344 times
Reputation: 5692
Quote:
Originally Posted by QCongress83216 View Post
IMO, you're going off what people or the media say about smaller cities. I battled with that for a long time with my feelings of living in Cleveland. I had to learn to balance the pros and cons; you'll have to do the same thing whether you stay in your current city or move somewhere else. But, you're not a failure because you're still living in your hometown. You're only a failure if you let other define you instead of you defining you. Happiness and success is based on the person not in the city you live in. If you move to a different city, do it because it's the best decision for you, not because you feel like you'll be in with the cool crowd. Just because you live in a "cool city" doesn't make you cool, and just because you live in an "uncool city" doesn't make you uncool. There are some people in "cool city" that want to move because of cost of living is getting too expensive.
The opposite is true where I live.


The people who stay put are actually the successful ones. The ones who can't afford it are the ones who leave. If they are 'failing' to make ends meet here, they leave. The ones killing life are the ones who pay the exorbitant prices and still stay. That's making it. That is success here.


People here are not impressed with people who leave this area for a cheaper life. Anyone can do that. What is impressive is people staying put and hauling tush in an area that is among the most expensive in the country.
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Old 01-30-2019, 03:24 PM
 
Location: The Heart of Dixie
7,816 posts, read 12,321,925 times
Reputation: 4767
1. Some people may not have a need to move. They grow up surrounded by friends and family and are able to get a job close to home that they're satisfied with. Helps if your local area happens to have a healthy economy. Here in Baton Rouge, LA we have a diverse economy with well paying jobs for people of all educational backgrounds ranging from white collar work associated with LSU and related fields to the oil/gas industry.

2. Some places are more pleasant to live in than others. I grew up in South Louisiana and most people here are quite content (with the possible exception of Lake Charles) and don't really feel a desire to move. In fact many are extremely proud to be from here and say there's no place else they'd rather live. A lot of West Virginia people are like this too. People may look down on WV and urban people may say there's "nothing to do" there but if you the outdoors, rural life, small town living it really is "almost heaven". Many people who DO leave WV for work try to go back as soon as they can. While I personally don't want to live in California, and while there's an exodus from that state, there are also many California natives who swear California is the best place on Earth and they would never move. Particularly people from San Diego and Orange County.

When I lived in Baltimore, everyone around me was constantly talking about how Baltimore and Maryland sucked and how they all wanted to leave.

3. Many people WOULD NOT be comfortable moving someplace where they don't already know someone. I personally am like this. I did move back to Louisiana for more work opportunities but it was also only because I already have a wide network of friends here, though to be honest I've made some great new friends since coming back too.

4. Certain areas are very close knit. For example in WV its quite common for someone's entire family and extended family to live in the same town or at least within 2 or 3 hours. Many people there value things like this over careers and money and there's nothing wrong with that.

5. Some cities are so unique that natives find it hard to fit in anywhere else. New Orleans and NYC immediately come to mind. Many people from the heart of Appalachian WV and Kentucky and from deep in Louisiana Cajun Country are this way as well. I know Mexicans from Laredo, Texas who will never leave South Texas because they're used to living in a Hispanic area and would not be comfortable someplace too "gringo" in their own words. I personally also have to live in an area where Southern and/or regular American culture predominates.

I would say that West Virginia and Louisiana are among the most "deeply rooted" states where people stay for family and cultural reasons. California, Texas and Florida have a lot of people who are satisfied with what they consider the good life. Maryland, Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and Ohio seem to have a lot of people who want to leave.
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