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Old 03-09-2010, 12:30 AM
 
Location: Chicago, Illinois
3,047 posts, read 8,141,279 times
Reputation: 1373

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jluke65780 View Post
As a dark-skinned brother; I have to disagree. Seriously, put up Beyonce against any dark-skinned woman in Hollywood and watch her be the most favored. I'd also like the add that if Beyonce was dark-skinned; I honestly don't believe she'd have as much fame as she has now. Hell I even think the same thing with Obama; just picture if he was Wesley Snipe color ().
Well, that's because Obama is white. Obama wouldn't have sniffed President hood if he wasn't white. He has George W. Bush's blood in him:

http://www.nypost.com/p/news/regiona...qBgHPdXXdGWnEP

Quote:
Originally Posted by LZKay1 View Post
Most people don't find black women attractive. I'm not trying to insult you, obviously it isn't your fault, but that's reality. It usually goes in the order of White, Hispanic or Asian, then Black women for who is most attractive, in many people's eyes.

Considering this reality, if you find a man who wants to date you, you should hold onto him tight, because there's no telling when you'd find another.

I'm sorry it has to be this way. Just realize it doesn't have any bearing on your personality or soul and is soley human nature.
Asian women are really flying up the charts. They just aren't as fat as the others.

Quote:
Originally Posted by shiver View Post
I think that NYC, Miami, LA and Atlanta are your best bets. I'd stick to large cities.

If you like Latin men, I highly recommend Miami. Lots of Latin guys there and generally speaking, they're more aggressive and more fliratious in approaching women.
This is because Latin men come from societies and cultures where being #1 is accepted. Here in America, women try to be equal and this BS when in reality they really want an aggressive man at heart. Why do you think this thread exists? American men would be more aggressive and flirtatious too if they didn't have to deal with all the ugly, old, feminist women who are bitter talking smack all the time about American men.

bottom line is if you come from a culture (like latin men do) where women are controlled by men, the men will be more aggressive. It's like this in Africa too. It's just that in the day and age of liberated women, women think and say they want one thing when in reality they crave an aggressive man. It's basic instinct.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bone Saw View Post
I haven't read all the posts so this may have already been said. One of the many possible reasons you're not being approached by black males is that they (black males) are tired of "frightening" people. It seems more often than not, no one wants to make eye-to-eye contact with black males, let alone engage in a conversations with ones they don't already know. People of all races would rather pretend the Black male isn't there, so perhaps the men are just playing that same game now.
I don't know wtf you are talking about. However, walk the streets of Chicago. 99 out of 100 people who harass you for money or get in your face and violate your personal space are black males. Strange, huh? It's just the way it is. You make eye contact with a black man looking for money in Chicago and he's gonna harass you for money, food, anything for half a block. You live and you learn. Sure white people ask for money too but they don't get all in your face, get loud, or violate your personal space like the black ones do. You shouldn't be mad at other people for holding grudges against black males. You should be mad at black males who F it up for people like you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Peacelilies View Post
This is not a joke, I am serious about this question. I have lived in both Maryland (college) and the Midwest (job) and found that in those areas, men of all races do not actively pursue black women.

I don't know whether it is cultural, fear of sexual harassment accusations or just plain zero attraction to black women but in those places I got (and still get) no play.

A little about me, I grew up in Ghana, a country where men actively pursue women. They make catcalls, walk up to you and boldly ask you out for a date.

Since I moved to the U.S., I have not had that experience. I know I am not ugly but for the life of me, cannot explain why I never get asked out. I asked a caucasian colleague of mine and she said that American men are just shy and that they don't chase women the way I was used to in Ghana. She advised me to make eye contact with men I like and to smile encouragingly.

I tried that but failed woefully. I am just not used to making the first moves with a man also, the men I liked were not attracted to me.

I decided to stop but now want to move to an area where men are bolder. Does such a place exist in the U.S.?

I am professional, 26 with a grad degree
It's just the way it is. African American women are the lowest on the totem pole in American society. Ask yourself, why is that?

It is something I find puzzling and often ponder about.

I have many theories but just don't know which ones are the major reasons for it. African American women just don't get treated like the other women do. Maybe that's because of how the African American men treat them in comparison of how latino men treat latina women or white men treat white women, etc.

Last edited by At1WithNature; 03-09-2010 at 01:28 AM..
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Old 03-09-2010, 10:16 AM
 
Location: Washington D.C. By way of Texas
18,638 posts, read 27,073,493 times
Reputation: 9580
Quote:
Originally Posted by At1WithNature View Post
Well, that's because Obama is white. Obama wouldn't have sniffed President hood if he wasn't white. He has George W. Bush's blood in him:
If you want to get technical then, almost every black person has white blood in them. Hardly any born Black American is 100% of anything.
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Old 03-09-2010, 10:48 AM
 
484 posts, read 1,082,233 times
Reputation: 439
Quote:
Originally Posted by UTHORNS96 View Post
I don't think the original question was how black men felt about black women, but how men of all races as a whole do.

While I certainly can not stand those who blame every problem they're having on the fact that they're black, I think you are really downplaying the issue here.

There are a ton of black girls on my campus who a attractive, nice, and intelligent yet a lot of them are single. On the other hand even the most unpleasant behaving, trashiest looking women of other races all seem to have a boyfriend no matter what. Houston...we have a problem here.
As to the OP, I think some of her experience stems not so much from being black but from being foreign (Ghana). A lot of people of all races in the US just aren't into foreign people (people actually born and/or raised in a foreign country). Like others told her, she may have better luck in a city with more foreign-born people.

I don't agree that it's a problem that men of other races don't find black women attractive. You're attracted to what you are attracted to and it's natural to find beauty in the same race.
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Old 03-09-2010, 10:53 AM
 
Location: Underneath the Pecan Tree
15,989 posts, read 30,691,036 times
Reputation: 7281
Quote:
Originally Posted by enigmaingr View Post
As to the OP, I think some of her experience stems not so much from being black but from being foreign (Ghana). A lot of people of all races in the US just aren't into foreign people (people actually born and/or raised in a foreign country). Like others told her, she may have better luck in a city with more foreign-born people.

I don't agree that it's a problem that men of other races don't find black women attractive. You're attracted to what you are attracted to and it's natural to find beauty in the same race.
the DMV area has LOTS of foreign-born people. DC area has like one of the largest Ghanaian populations in the country.
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Old 03-09-2010, 11:31 AM
 
56,660 posts, read 80,973,859 times
Reputation: 12521
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spade View Post
If you want to get technical then, almost every black person has white blood in them. Hardly any born Black American is 100% of anything.
Vice versa if go by the origins of man in an archeological context and the same can be said about many whites as well in terms of background.
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Old 03-09-2010, 12:11 PM
 
Location: Chicago metro
3,509 posts, read 7,318,708 times
Reputation: 2023
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spade View Post
If you want to get technical then, almost every black person has white blood in them. Hardly any born Black American is 100% of anything.

And hardly any White American is 100% of anything.
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Old 03-09-2010, 01:13 PM
 
Location: Prescott Valley, Az (unfortunately still here)
2,550 posts, read 3,970,297 times
Reputation: 1521
Quote:
Originally Posted by Peacelilies View Post
This is not a joke, I am serious about this question. I have lived in both Maryland (college) and the Midwest (job) and found that in those areas, men of all races do not actively pursue black women.

I don't know whether it is cultural, fear of sexual harassment accusations or just plain zero attraction to black women but in those places I got (and still get) no play.

A little about me, I grew up in Ghana, a country where men actively pursue women. They make catcalls, walk up to you and boldly ask you out for a date.

Since I moved to the U.S., I have not had that experience. I know I am not ugly but for the life of me, cannot explain why I never get asked out. I asked a caucasian colleague of mine and she said that American men are just shy and that they don't chase women the way I was used to in Ghana. She advised me to make eye contact with men I like and to smile encouragingly.

I tried that but failed woefully. I am just not used to making the first moves with a man also, the men I liked were not attracted to me.

I decided to stop but now want to move to an area where men are bolder. Does such a place exist in the U.S.?

I am professional, 26 with a grad degree
Some parts of Florida the men pursue women

Houston, Texas and Dallas, Texas too. And possibly around the New Orleans area.
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Old 03-09-2010, 05:04 PM
 
Location: Austin, Texas
3,093 posts, read 4,137,446 times
Reputation: 3117
Quote:
Originally Posted by enigmaingr View Post
As to the OP, I think some of her experience stems not so much from being black but from being foreign (Ghana). A lot of people of all races in the US just aren't into foreign people (people actually born and/or raised in a foreign country). Like others told her, she may have better luck in a city with more foreign-born people.

I don't agree that it's a problem that men of other races don't find black women attractive. You're attracted to what you are attracted to and it's natural to find beauty in the same race.
Yes, people are attracted to their same race. However, other races have no problems showing their attraction to every other race of women except black women.

And to reply to kdogg, it isn't as big an exageration as you might think. Why just the other night I was driving home from 6th street with a couple of my friends (who are both tar black mind you). One of them was basically complaining about about how uppity women on 6th street are (each got repeatedly rejected which I admit I found kind of comical...but I digress). Then he said something to the effect of "Those girls act like they're the best thing ever. When really the only thing most of them have going for them is they're not that dark". That raises a pretty big alarm. So this type of thinking still exists believe or not...sadly.

BTW, as far as Beyonce goes I do believe her light skin allows her to enjoy the mainstream success she does today. If she was 4 or 5 shades darker I don't believe she would be nearly as popular. That's just my opinion though.
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Old 03-09-2010, 05:10 PM
 
Location: Toronto
1,655 posts, read 5,222,203 times
Reputation: 817
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chicagoland60426 View Post
And hardly any White American is 100% of anything.
No one on earth is 100% of anything..
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Old 03-10-2010, 11:19 AM
 
484 posts, read 1,082,233 times
Reputation: 439
Quote:
Originally Posted by UTHORNS96 View Post
Yes, people are attracted to their same race. However, other races have no problems showing their attraction to every other race of women except black women.

And to reply to kdogg, it isn't as big an exageration as you might think. Why just the other night I was driving home from 6th street with a couple of my friends (who are both tar black mind you). One of them was basically complaining about about how uppity women on 6th street are (each got repeatedly rejected which I admit I found kind of comical...but I digress). Then he said something to the effect of "Those girls act like they're the best thing ever. When really the only thing most of them have going for them is they're not that dark". That raises a pretty big alarm. So this type of thinking still exists believe or not...sadly.

BTW, as far as Beyonce goes I do believe her light skin allows her to enjoy the mainstream success she does today. If she was 4 or 5 shades darker I don't believe she would be nearly as popular. That's just my opinion though.
I agree that colorism still exists among the black community, which I find odd in light of what it historically meant to be light skinned. Lighter skin was most often associated with european features (smaller noses, "good hair", ect.). Nowadays, after several generations of race mixing, you can have dark skin with those features.

In my opinion, Beyonce isn't light enough for her complexion to fully explain her success. She is an example, though, of someone with more widely accepted physical features.

To me, skin color is just one part of the equation. A lot depends on how you carry yourself, how you dress, where you hang out, and how you talk. I've seen a lot of dark skinned black women who "act white" get play from all types of men; likewise, Eve back in the day probably wasn't considered attractive to other types of men even though she's light skinned.
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