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Old 11-15-2009, 11:16 AM
 
Location: Albuquerque, NM - Summerlin, NV
3,436 posts, read 5,995,780 times
Reputation: 682

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Quote:
Originally Posted by 18Montclair View Post
I am gay and I've never been assaulted anywhere.

Of course I don't walk around wearing a thong, feather boa and heels.

Not that doing that merits abuse in any form, but its not like my sexuality is obvious.
Exactly. Same here.
And not all gay guys are going to do that. I never have, and never will.
And most of the people I tell would have never known.


Quote:
Originally Posted by PITTSTON2SARASOTA View Post
Let me add that I have had verbal assaults in every city I lived in. Also threatened in every city; but I have luckily avoided violence except that one time mentioned earlier. That situation left me no choice and I had to get violent to defend myself or get rapped. PS...I don't "bottom"(winks).
Don't bottom huh? ever question your sexuality by the way... serious.
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Old 11-15-2009, 06:17 PM
 
Location: where my heart is
5,642 posts, read 7,992,859 times
Reputation: 1661
Default Or leave the house

Quote:
Originally Posted by DeaconJ View Post
Did you remind her that the Bible also says that women shouldn't speak in public?
when "unclean"? Going to need a whole lot of sick days from work with that one.
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Old 11-15-2009, 07:11 PM
 
Location: The Queen City
444 posts, read 1,030,468 times
Reputation: 173
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chicago60614 View Post
Well gay people and religion have nothing to do with one another. That's like saying speaking a certain language or being left handed are tied to religion. I'm an extremely easy going guy about almost anything and everything - but one thing that always makes me roll my eyes is the whole religion and gay thing. I was born, I grew up, and I'm gay. That's about as interesting as the story gets. Someone walking up to be and telling me I'm damned to hell because I'm gay is like saying that everyone who was born in the month of September is going to hell because it's an evil month.

Really? I didn't choose this, I've never done anything to hurt another person. I have friends, a decent job, a loving family and carry on my life just like everyone else. I'm honestly going to hell and am some sort of abomination because if you line up 100 people I for whatever reason in my human traits and am attracted to people that is different from most?

Wayyyyyyy more important things to worry about.
Just a few questions I mean no harm to you.
Ok: I think you are right, that you didnt have this choice. Are you happy with who you are?
Do you think/ or know that the American culture has an effect on what you are? (example: fashion vs. "macho man")
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Old 11-15-2009, 08:00 PM
 
Location: right under the ceiling fan ;)
597 posts, read 1,129,575 times
Reputation: 561
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thomas R. View Post
I remember getting in a conversation once where one of my sisters said "The Bible does say they are to be stoned." I don't think she was really advocated stoning them, but I think it was a way to say "it's way way worse than anything." I told her the part of Leviticus that says one should stone homosexuals also says we should stone adulterers and she at first didn't believe it.

I wasn't really surprised, but it's interesting how many Christians don't just see "homosexuality as a sin like adultery" but as something way way worse than that. (Interestingly I saw a man online once who seemed to indicate homosexuality was a sin but that same-sex marriage should be allowed because we allow adulterers to leave their spouse and marry their mistress or fling.) Another thing though is that with men it doesn't even always seem to be a religious thing. I've seen men who don't seem at all religious, but who have a problem with gays.
Hi Thomas,
I am a Christian but I can NOT imagine Jesus stoning (or hurting) a gay person, I just can not. I remember the story about how people were going to stone Mary M and how Jesus stepped in and stopped them. I truly beleive that he would do the same if ANYONE tried to hurt a homosexual for their sexual orientation. Jesus is love! That is what I would have said to your sister.
There is absolutly NO excuse in hurting anyone, PERIOD!!!!!
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Old 11-15-2009, 11:30 PM
 
Location: 30-40N 90-100W
13,856 posts, read 23,018,394 times
Reputation: 6692
Oh me neither. In fairness to my older sister I think it's highly unlikely she was advocating stoning anyone. She has actually gotten along with gays okay, more or less, but I think to her it is more offensive than most things that deviate from the Bible. She's more "Bible oriented" than most Catholics I know, but I doubt she's even the type to start say wearing a shawl because Paul advises it.

Interestingly she's also intensely into family loyalty. Despite her personal disapproval I think if someone attacked a gay relative of hers she'd defend him or her to the hilt. At times this is admirable and at other times I think she goes overboard so starts defending loved ones more vociferously than they actually want. (As in say a loved one gets beat up she'll want to start tearing people apart even if the victim may want a calmer response)
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Old 11-17-2009, 05:54 PM
 
Location: Albuquerque, NM - Summerlin, NV
3,436 posts, read 5,995,780 times
Reputation: 682
Quote:
Originally Posted by PITTSTON2SARASOTA View Post
NO....Different strokes and different pokes....for different folks....NEVER generalize a group of people. Nor should YOU ever ASSume what people do in the "sack"!! . PS...I watch, understand and like football...shocking isn't it!
Assume that people could be confused? Maybe...?
So what makes the relationship? that would suck.. maybe it would get boring.

And football huh? so what are you trying to point out? Who doesnt in America.
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Old 11-17-2009, 10:05 PM
 
Location: Sarasota, Florida
15,400 posts, read 19,609,905 times
Reputation: 11067
Quote:
Originally Posted by bradly View Post
Assume that people could be confused? Maybe...?
So what makes the relationship? that would suck.. maybe it would get boring.

And football huh? so what are you trying to point out? Who doesnt in America.
Suck is an operative word I knew I was gay @ age 6 so; I was having sex probably before you were born. I just don't understand what you mean.

At first I thought you were straight; that's why I made the football comment. Now I assume you're gay too....we are all different, even gays. I just do not like "catching"..doesn't mean I don't pitch, or do other things. BTW..I have had the same dude for almost 27 years...must be doing something right Though I get frisky/curious, but the one time I tried...well just not for me. seriously!
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Old 11-18-2009, 07:59 AM
 
Location: Albuquerque, NM - Summerlin, NV
3,436 posts, read 5,995,780 times
Reputation: 682
Quote:
Originally Posted by PITTSTON2SARASOTA View Post
Suck is an operative word I knew I was gay @ age 6 so; I was having sex probably before you were born. I just don't understand what you mean.

At first I thought you were straight; that's why I made the football comment. Now I assume you're gay too....we are all different, even gays. I just do not like "catching"..doesn't mean I don't pitch, or do other things. BTW..I have had the same dude for almost 27 years...must be doing something right Though I get frisky/curious, but the one time I tried...well just not for me. seriously!

Well you probably have considering i'm in my late twenties.
And yes i'am... No one can ever tell, but as for me I probably could not go that long with the same-sex, it just sorta would feel awkward I guess.
But yea, I got what you ment. And yes, all gays are different thats forsure.
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Old 11-18-2009, 11:25 AM
 
11,194 posts, read 22,429,656 times
Reputation: 10947
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raivere View Post
Just a few questions I mean no harm to you.
Ok: I think you are right, that you didnt have this choice. Are you happy with who you are?
Do you think/ or know that the American culture has an effect on what you are? (example: fashion vs. "macho man")
For a few years it really made me mad. I mean here I am, grew up in a really awesome household with parents that everyone loved, I'm good looking (not trying to sound vain), kept in shape, good friends, straight A's in school, liked sports, got my Masters, never been in trouble. For all purposes my life was perfect - except for that one glaring thing that I had no control over and as I grew older was eating itself more and more into who I am as a person. I tried to just ignore it. For awhile I was just going to marry a woman, admit "defeat" and just make her happy and make everyone happy and try to be happy.

Well I didn't make it past 21 years old before I realized that I have ONE life on this earth - and why should I go live it just trying to do what I thought would make everyone happy? I said screw it, came out, relaxed a TON, and started living my life without the constant "how should I be acting in this situation?". No one cared I was gay, most were upset I took so long to tell them. None of them had a clue though. I just turned 30 though, and after years and years of wishing I was straight, the past 5-6 years or so I've realized that I'm actually really happy with who I am. I love my life, my friends and my family. For what hand life dealt me, I really wouldn't change a thing.


As far as the second question - I think it was more me trying to do what I thought society wanted. I was about 5 times more concerned with how I thought I should be acting than anyone actually cared how I was acting. I came out to my coworkers who had developed into some of my best friends after 5 years on the job. I finally broke down and told them and every single one of them, male and female, was upset that I hadn't told them earlier. None of them had any issues about it, and after the hour of shock and talking, life went back to normal.

I mean I'm a football and baseball fanatic. I love hockey, I just tore my entire dryer apart last night to fix a squeak problem (need to replace the rear drum rollers). I got bored last week and rewired my kitchen. I love beer. I'm fully capable of fixing appliances and construction with a manual. I love camping and getting diry. I also like Project Runway, Real Housewifes of Atlanta, and I like a good martini.

Fashion wise - I just dress how I dress. My gay friends always make fun of me because I literally buy everything I wear at Old Navy. I just like the cheap stuff, and it feels comfortable on me. Like hell I'm going to go blow $120 on a pair of designer jeans or a $80 shirt. That's just not who I am.

As far as "macho" - I use to try and do things that were seen as more macho, but now I just do what I feel like doing. I watch Football because I want to, not because it's macho. I also eat salads for lunch. I just think they taste good, and I could stand to watch my weight a little bit. Guys at work will laugh at me for eating a salad, say stupid things - but who cares? It's food. Same with shows like Real Housewives and Project Runway. They're "gay" shows, but seriously, I watch them because I find them entertaining/interesting, or just funny as sh*t. Try and tell me there aren't straight guys out there watching this crap and then not telling anyone because it's "gay". Same with me ordering vodka and diet coke. Guys will look like "seriously dude?". Yeah, seriously. I don't feel like drinking a gallon of beer, I actually prefer diet because the sugar gets to be too much, I want to get totally drunk because it's been a long long week, and I've gained 10 pounds the past 3 months and probably don't need to be wolfing down a 2 liter of coke as an after thought to my desired vodka. Sue me.

Last edited by Chicago60614; 11-18-2009 at 11:37 AM..
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Old 11-18-2009, 05:37 PM
 
Location: The Queen City
444 posts, read 1,030,468 times
Reputation: 173
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chicago60614 View Post
For a few years it really made me mad. I mean here I am, grew up in a really awesome household with parents that everyone loved, I'm good looking (not trying to sound vain), kept in shape, good friends, straight A's in school, liked sports, got my Masters, never been in trouble. For all purposes my life was perfect - except for that one glaring thing that I had no control over and as I grew older was eating itself more and more into who I am as a person. I tried to just ignore it. For awhile I was just going to marry a woman, admit "defeat" and just make her happy and make everyone happy and try to be happy.

Well I didn't make it past 21 years old before I realized that I have ONE life on this earth - and why should I go live it just trying to do what I thought would make everyone happy? I said screw it, came out, relaxed a TON, and started living my life without the constant "how should I be acting in this situation?". No one cared I was gay, most were upset I took so long to tell them. None of them had a clue though. I just turned 30 though, and after years and years of wishing I was straight, the past 5-6 years or so I've realized that I'm actually really happy with who I am. I love my life, my friends and my family. For what hand life dealt me, I really wouldn't change a thing.


As far as the second question - I think it was more me trying to do what I thought society wanted. I was about 5 times more concerned with how I thought I should be acting than anyone actually cared how I was acting. I came out to my coworkers who had developed into some of my best friends after 5 years on the job. I finally broke down and told them and every single one of them, male and female, was upset that I hadn't told them earlier. None of them had any issues about it, and after the hour of shock and talking, life went back to normal.

I mean I'm a football and baseball fanatic. I love hockey, I just tore my entire dryer apart last night to fix a squeak problem (need to replace the rear drum rollers). I got bored last week and rewired my kitchen. I love beer. I'm fully capable of fixing appliances and construction with a manual. I love camping and getting diry. I also like Project Runway, Real Housewifes of Atlanta, and I like a good martini.

Fashion wise - I just dress how I dress. My gay friends always make fun of me because I literally buy everything I wear at Old Navy. I just like the cheap stuff, and it feels comfortable on me. Like hell I'm going to go blow $120 on a pair of designer jeans or a $80 shirt. That's just not who I am.

As far as "macho" - I use to try and do things that were seen as more macho, but now I just do what I feel like doing. I watch Football because I want to, not because it's macho. I also eat salads for lunch. I just think they taste good, and I could stand to watch my weight a little bit. Guys at work will laugh at me for eating a salad, say stupid things - but who cares? It's food. Same with shows like Real Housewives and Project Runway. They're "gay" shows, but seriously, I watch them because I find them entertaining/interesting, or just funny as sh*t. Try and tell me there aren't straight guys out there watching this crap and then not telling anyone because it's "gay". Same with me ordering vodka and diet coke. Guys will look like "seriously dude?". Yeah, seriously. I don't feel like drinking a gallon of beer, I actually prefer diet because the sugar gets to be too much, I want to get totally drunk because it's been a long long week, and I've gained 10 pounds the past 3 months and probably don't need to be wolfing down a 2 liter of coke as an after thought to my desired vodka. Sue me.
Well I meant like with the whole "American macho man" that has developed in the U.S. (you know, all males have to be strong and manly) but you made your point clear and I like your answer. Thank you for helping me understand.
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