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Go out and have fun. I think you will have a harder time leaving him than anything else. It is hard being separated for the first time. Just remember that you are leaving him in good hands so that you can have some much needed down time.
ETA: I think that taking care of yourself and your marriage is a very important part of being a good parent. You are usually a much better parent if you get some time to yourself.
I think you're lucky to have willing, capable family close by. Your mom is lucky to have the chance to get to bond with her grandchild, and you baby is lucky to have the chance to get to know his grandma. Sounds like a win-win situation.
Good for you! I think it's great that you have family who are willing and able to watch your little one overnight. There are days where I think I would willing give a limb to have the same resource!
Try not to mind the parents who judge - if it's not judging leaving little one over night, it'll be not feeding homemade food, or using the "wrong" kind of diapers or discipline (aka, if someone's going to judge, they're going to judge over something, and it's their problem not yours). Everyone seems to have an opinion on parenting, but as the parent of your child, your opinion is the one that counts.
Holy crap you guys, you must have some messed up families if you can't leave your kids with your own parents, especially if they WANT to do it! A few hours, a day, a week, a month, FOR FRACKING EVER...grandparents have been doing this longer than you! I fail to see a controversy except in the minds of some strange individuals!
For both of my kids, the first time I was apart from them for any length of time was when they were 5-6 weeks old and I left them for about 2 hours to go to the dentist. The first time I was away from my oldest overnight was when she was almost 3 years old, because I was in the hospital giving birth to her sister. When she was about 3.5 years old, we started letting her spend the night with the grandparents since they were begging and we felt she was ready. We stipulated that if they want her to sleep over, they would have to let her sleep in bed with them (she was used to co-sleeping at home), and they agreed. We let her go one night per month, alternating months at each grandparent's home. They were into it for about 6 months and then I guess they lost interest and stopped scheduling overnights. I have still not been away from my 2 year old overnight. I am away from them all day when I'm at work, and that is enough away time for me. I don't have a desire for more time away from the kids. When we go out, we take the kids. When we go on vacation, we take the kids too. When they have stayed over with grandparents, it was at grandparents' request, not ours. I expect I will let my younger go overnight when she is 3 as well.
When they are very little, part of the reason I don't want to leave them is that I'm breastfeeding. It's a hassle to pump, and my kids nurse on-demand when I'm there. I have to be gone for work during the day, so I am already pumping then, and I have no desire to pump more than I have to. I'd prefer to just be with my kids and nurse. I co-sleep and nurse overnight, and I have no idea how my kids would do for a night without me when they are used to that. So I don't do it. I won't leave them at night until they are night-weaned at the minimum, and I don't night-wean my kids until they are at least 2 years old.
My SIL is a totally different story. She was leaving her baby overnight with grandma regularly since 10 days old. I admit I was surprised to hear that, and probably have judged her for that too. Also, she was not breastfeeding, which makes it a very different situation I think. She doesn't need to worry about pumping or feeling engorged or having enough milk pumped in advance for grandma to feed the baby or whether baby will take a bottle while she's gone or any of that. She just drops her off with a can of formula and leaves and doesn't have to think about baby milk again until she is back.
For both of my kids, the first time I was apart from them for any length of time was when they were 5-6 weeks old and I left them for about 2 hours to go to the dentist. The first time I was away from my oldest overnight was when she was almost 3 years old, because I was in the hospital giving birth to her sister. When she was about 3.5 years old, we started letting her spend the night with the grandparents since they were begging and we felt she was ready. We stipulated that if they want her to sleep over, they would have to let her sleep in bed with them (she was used to co-sleeping at home), and they agreed. We let her go one night per month, alternating months at each grandparent's home. They were into it for about 6 months and then I guess they lost interest and stopped scheduling overnights. I have still not been away from my 2 year old overnight. I am away from them all day when I'm at work, and that is enough away time for me. I don't have a desire for more time away from the kids. When we go out, we take the kids. When we go on vacation, we take the kids too. When they have stayed over with grandparents, it was at grandparents' request, not ours. I expect I will let my younger go overnight when she is 3 as well.
When they are very little, part of the reason I don't want to leave them is that I'm breastfeeding. It's a hassle to pump, and my kids nurse on-demand when I'm there. I have to be gone for work during the day, so I am already pumping then, and I have no desire to pump more than I have to. I'd prefer to just be with my kids and nurse. I co-sleep and nurse overnight, and I have no idea how my kids would do for a night without me when they are used to that. So I don't do it. I won't leave them at night until they are night-weaned at the minimum, and I don't night-wean my kids until they are at least 2 years old.
My SIL is a totally different story. She was leaving her baby overnight with grandma regularly since 10 days old. I admit I was surprised to hear that, and probably have judged her for that too. Also, she was not breastfeeding, which makes it a very different situation I think. She doesn't need to worry about pumping or feeling engorged or having enough milk pumped in advance for grandma to feed the baby or whether baby will take a bottle while she's gone or any of that. She just drops her off with a can of formula and leaves and doesn't have to think about baby milk again until she is back.
I am probably overstepping my boundaries and you are of course free to tell me to zip it, but I have to ask. When do you ever just spend time with your husband, just the two of you to enjoy each other? No dates or anything? You don't even sleep together without a child (at least one) with you? Every marriage needs time to be adults.
When she was about 3.5 years old, we started letting her spend the night with the grandparents since they were begging and we felt she was ready. We stipulated that if they want her to sleep over, they would have to let her sleep in bed with them (she was used to co-sleeping at home), and they agreed.
I assume the cosleeping has stopped now? That alone would prevent most rational people from wanting her to visit them overnight.
My SIL is a totally different story. She was leaving her baby overnight with grandma regularly since 10 days old. I admit I was surprised to hear that, and probably have judged her for that too.
I don't think leaving your newborn overnight to go take a trip is ever a great idea. I can understand that you may want to get out of the house with your husband occasionally but does it really have to be an overnight thing?
Welcome to parenting. It's not all about you anymore.
I don't think leaving your newborn overnight to go take a trip is ever a great idea. I can understand that you may want to get out of the house with your husband occasionally but does it really have to be an overnight thing?
Welcome to parenting. It's not all about you anymore.
How is leaving a newborn with grandparents who presumably have successfully raised children a bad thing? What harm would you expect to result?
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