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Old 09-02-2011, 02:05 AM
 
591 posts, read 743,413 times
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From the standpoint of grandma having to buy stuff, it's not just.

Bur from the standpoint that grandma will likely kick their ass if they do wrong, it is totally just.
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Old 09-02-2011, 03:08 AM
 
7,496 posts, read 9,690,022 times
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Interesting article, and probably true. It probably is a mixture of economic (lack of good jobs), social (as a commenter admitted, safety nets) and personal (people taking advantage of all of this and either assuming others will always be there to take care of their needs and/or simply living the way they otherwise would without regard to the fact that logically, they shouldn't be because of economic limitations (having more kids than one can afford).

Although I have to say a comment at the end of the article fried me. It said "How did the Caylee living with her grandmother-thing work out?" The poor little girl is dead for crying out loud! Have some effing respect! Let her and her name rest in peace already! Sorry, just had to vent about that.

Last edited by Osito; 09-02-2011 at 03:11 AM.. Reason: had one more thing to add
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Old 10-03-2011, 07:08 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
1,820 posts, read 3,985,214 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by girlenigma View Post
I don't think I could ever just dump my kid on my mom and I don't think the economy has anything to do with this "trend". If I was economically in trouble bad enough then we would maybe move in with my mom together to get on our feet but I would still be the one raising and taking care of my child. My mom already raised her kids now she will jsut get to enjoy being grandma (once the baby shows up any day now).
I completely agree! It is just ridiculous. I have never lived close ro my family since becoming a mom, so I am use to doing all on my own ( with my husband)' but I just would not expect my parents to be our daycare providers or just dump my kids off every time we needed a "break" or wanted to go out.
I see it ALL of the time though. I am amazed at the fact that people just seem to expect their parents to be there for their every need ...
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Old 10-03-2011, 07:45 AM
 
5,748 posts, read 10,728,731 times
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Intergenerational families can arise for a variety of reasons, and it is unfortunate that this article gives the impression that grandma only becomes involved because of parental failures. But this economy has been rough on all generations. When a grandmother faces financial difficulties, a very common solution is for her better-off child(ren) to "hire" her to provide childcare. I know lots of families who do this. It's a way to keep Grandma afloat when Social Security runs short. And if things are really bad, Grandma moves into the spare room and provides an hour or two of after-school supervision. It's a win-win situation for all involved.
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Old 10-03-2011, 08:02 AM
 
4,248 posts, read 8,101,190 times
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I expected the traditional 60-80ish grandma in the article, and there is a 48 year old woman! She could be a mother to all these kids, with women nowadays delaying birth into their late 30s-40s. She is adoption the oldest one, 12 year old. How old are her own children, then, - still in the troughs of figuring out life? The article almost doesn't make a point with me about the intended topic of "kids being raised by grandmothers", but more like "the vagarities of babies having babies."
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Old 10-03-2011, 08:38 AM
 
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I had similar thoughts, Nuala. We all reap what we sow, and I don't recall any mention of a Grandpa in the article.

One set of my kids' grandparents are in their mid '70s. Altough they do not live near us, my husband and I have talked at length about how we will handle my mother's needs when my father dies. (He has been very ill.) I do not know if she will be able to remain in their home. Our current house is not large enough to accomodate her, but we have considered buying a larger home and living together.

We would hardly be the only ones. It's not at all uncommon in this neighborhood to see multi-generational households, and it's definitely not because we are taking advantage of our parent's generosity. It's a cooperative venture born of our love for and obligation to one another, rather than an example of intergenerational strife as it's portrayed in the CNN article.
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Old 10-03-2011, 08:58 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
1,820 posts, read 3,985,214 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by formercalifornian View Post
I had similar thoughts, Nuala. We all reap what we sow, and I don't recall any mention of a Grandpa in the article.

One set of my kids' grandparents are in their mid '70s. Altough they do not live near us, my husband and I have talked at length about how we will handle my mother's needs when my father dies. (He has been very ill.) I do not know if she will be able to remain in their home. Our current house is not large enough to accomodate her, but we have considered buying a larger home and living together.

We would hardly be the only ones. It's not at all uncommon in this neighborhood to see multi-generational households, and it's definitely not because we are taking advantage of our parent's generosity. It's a cooperative venture born of our love for and obligation to one another, rather than an example of intergenerational strife as it's portrayed in the CNN article.
I think that of course, there are these situations and I too, would consider having one of my ( or both) of my parents live with us if there was the need.
When I posted that I find it ridiculous, I was referring to the article and to my observations.
I have 2 very close feiends' who now have inlays living with them due to the fact that they require care and it was easier for them to have them move in and less expensive than many of the assisted living facilities.
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