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Old 07-27-2013, 08:37 PM
 
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My Grandson 17 was at the house the other day and out of the blue he says,"Grandpa you are really ugly and when you was younger you was too with your Buck Teeth".His Uncle and Dad both looked at him and at the same time and said,"You have a lot of room to talk".

Touched a nerve can't see how any kid much less a Grandchild could show so little respect.I didn't say anything should I of?

Oh I don't have the looks I felt I use to have and was always confident in myself to pick up any woman I wanted.My wife said I was still Good Looking Man to her.

brushrunner
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Old 07-27-2013, 08:52 PM
 
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Since his father and uncle corrected him, I don't know as it would have done any good to do the same. It just seems odd for a 17 yr old to suddenly say that, usually much younger kids may say something uncalled for but as they age, they should realize ppl have feelings and there's certain things you just don't say, esp. not to a loved one. Sounds like he's extremely thoughtless and prob. self-centered. NOt sure if it would do any good but maybe another time when it's just the 2 of you, you might casually bring it up and let him know how hurtful it was (what the heck good would a comment like that do - ?). In the meantime, I'd try to forget it but I think eventually bringing it up, when it's just the 2 of you, might not be a bad idea, wouldnt dwell on it but he's certainly old enough to know better and that ppl have feelings etc.

When our kids were young (am talking 5, 6, 7 yr old age bracket), if they said something embarrassing, we'd take them aside and let them know that it's not their place to tell anyone (or even mention) that someone has a big nose, is overweight etc, it's just not necessary, wouldn't overemphasize it but it's something they just don't do (later they can discuss it w/ the parent etc, that's fine, but not in front of others (say, in a dr's waiting room etc)).
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Old 07-27-2013, 09:06 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Honeycrisp View Post
Since his father and uncle corrected him, I don't know as it would have done any good to do the same. It just seems odd for a 17 yr old to suddenly say that, usually much younger kids may say something uncalled for but as they age, they should realize ppl have feelings and there's certain things you just don't say, esp. not to a loved one. Sounds like he's extremely thoughtless and prob. self-centered. NOt sure if it would do any good but maybe another time when it's just the 2 of you, you might casually bring it up and let him know how hurtful it was (what the heck good would a comment like that do - ?). In the meantime, I'd try to forget it but I think eventually bringing it up, when it's just the 2 of you, might not be a bad idea, wouldnt dwell on it but he's certainly old enough to know better and that ppl have feelings etc.

When our kids were young (am talking 5, 6, 7 yr old age bracket), if they said something embarrassing, we'd take them aside and let them know that it's not their place to tell anyone (or even mention) that someone has a big nose, is overweight etc, it's just not necessary, wouldn't overemphasize it but it's something they just don't do (later they can discuss it w/ the parent etc, that's fine, but not in front of others (say, in a dr's waiting room etc)).
He keeps bringing up a Girl at our Church he met while visiting one time,they went out a couple times and she broke off.He was saying things to her on Facebook that was very,very wrong.He keeps trying to tell me I shouldn't have anything to do with her.Well she has had problems but she is still my friend.And I really need to let him know how I feel.

brushrunner
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Old 07-27-2013, 09:46 PM
 
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Maybe that's why he said what he did, he's a bit jealous of your & her FB friendship and is reading too much into it. Am not an expert on FB by any means but there's probably a way so her name doesnt show on your official Friend list, so he can't see her. He probably knows how you feel but I would not mention her any more and if he does, would just change the subject ('Nice day, huh?!'), lol, that may have been the cause his nastiness (not that it's justified at all) - just tell him (in a nice but firm way) that you like her and his badmouthing her puts you in an awkward position so prob. best not to talk about it any more, unfort. though you don't mean to, you're getting put in the middle of it.

Hopefully she blocked him on FB, he sounds like he is unreasonable and has issues and she didn't want to waste any more time dealing w/ him, who can blame her.

Does he have a part-time job, is he keeping busy this summer - if not, there's time to get one (seeing as Aug. might be long month), it might do him some good and keep his mind off things.
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Old 07-27-2013, 10:03 PM
 
1,472 posts, read 1,987,579 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Honeycrisp View Post
Maybe that's why he said what he did, he's a bit jealous of your & her FB friendship and is reading too much into it. Am not an expert on FB by any means but there's probably a way so her name doesnt show on your official Friend list, so he can't see her. He probably knows how you feel but I would not mention her any more and if he does, would just change the subject ('Nice day, huh?!'), lol, that may have been the cause his nastiness (not that it's justified at all) - just tell him (in a nice but firm way) that you like her and his badmouthing her puts you in an awkward position so prob. best not to talk about it any more, unfort. though you don't mean to, you're getting put in the middle of it.

Hopefully she blocked him on FB, he sounds like he is unreasonable and has issues and she didn't want to waste any more time dealing w/ him, who can blame her.

Does he have a part-time job, is he keeping busy this summer - if not, there's time to get one (seeing as Aug. might be long month), it might do him some good and keep his mind off things.
Me and her are just friends at Church,never talk to her on Facebook but I am friends with him on Facebook,this is how I knew what he said.

brushrunner
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Old 07-27-2013, 10:04 PM
 
Location: southern california
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i have nephews like that. i dearly love them but they have not learned yet that a will can be changed and i will!!
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Old 07-27-2013, 10:08 PM
 
4,128 posts, read 13,271,725 times
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Originally Posted by brushrunner View Post
Me and her are just friends at Church,never talk to her on Facebook but I am friends with him on Facebook,this is how I knew what he said.

brushrunner
Ok, I get it now, no his badmouthing her isn't right but other than giving him your opinion (in a nice way), there's probably not much you can do, his acting the way he does kind of shows his true character
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Old 08-17-2013, 02:09 PM
 
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brushrunner...don't set too much store on what your grandson says...he's obviously still very naive , and has a lot to learn...it's not so much disrespect as it is ignorance...he'll figure that out when he's a little older.
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Old 10-24-2013, 08:49 PM
 
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If he thinks he can say anything to you all of a sudden that didn't start over night. At 17 you should have checked him out of the door until he learns some respect.
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Old 10-27-2013, 05:11 PM
 
47,576 posts, read 60,502,968 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by brushrunner View Post
My Grandson 17 was at the house the other day and out of the blue he says,"Grandpa you are really ugly and when you was younger you was too with your Buck Teeth".His Uncle and Dad both looked at him and at the same time and said,"You have a lot of room to talk".

Touched a nerve can't see how any kid much less a Grandchild could show so little respect.I didn't say anything should I of?

Oh I don't have the looks I felt I use to have and was always confident in myself to pick up any woman I wanted.My wife said I was still Good Looking Man to her.

brushrunner
I think if a kid says something like that, it had better be all in fun. Otherwise he was being a jerk and should have been clobbered (not-literally but verbally) for it. Since he got dumped by that girl, you had the perfect comeback -- "if you're so great looking, whatever happened to so-and-so?" I think if someone intentionally says something hurtful, they need to expect the same -- and learn if they can't take it, they shouldn't dish it out.

Otherwise if it was just that thing lots of guys do "you're so ugly, when you were born, the doctor slapped your mother", or "you're so ugly, you don't need a Halloween mask". Maybe he and his friends do that kind of thing among one another and he doesn't know the limits.
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