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Old 09-04-2013, 08:11 PM
 
1,472 posts, read 1,995,633 times
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Ok our Granddaughter 4 is Bad about taking food and throwing it away. Today my wife had a slice of Cheese she was saving for a Grilled Cheese Sandwich.

Granddaughter got the Cheese begged her Grandma for it, finally Grandma agreed. Granddaughter didn't even take a bite, started breaking it up and throwing it on the ground. My wife got on to her about it, Granddaughters Mom gets Mad and leaves with Granddaughter.

And yes my wife really wanted the sandwich

Any ideas how to deal with both Granddaughter and her Mom?

brushrunner
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Old 09-04-2013, 08:35 PM
 
4,133 posts, read 13,319,871 times
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If I had a slice of cheese earmarked for a grilled cheese sand. and my granddaughter wanted it, I'd prob. give in but I wouldnt be happy at her playing w/ it etc - it's too bad - I wouldnt have made a big deal about it (not saying that's what happened), it's only cheese but I w/h explained to the granddaughter that I really wanted it bc I was hungry and what she did wasnt nice, end of story. As for your daughter (DIL?), she prob. overreacted and took it personally which is too bad but no doubt it'll blow over but next time your granddaughter wants cheese, would talk her into a cracker or something like that, at 4 she may be ok w/ negotiating and she's not too young to have certain things explained (and to understand that No means No, in a nice way).
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Old 09-05-2013, 10:15 PM
 
1,961 posts, read 3,762,280 times
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1) Not a big deal.
2) I would probably leave with my kids too, if my mom started to throw a fit about a ruined piece of cheese.

Seriously. Its a piece of cheese. Your wife can go to the store and buy some more and then make her grilled cheese. Your granddaughter is 4. 4 year olds sometimes just play with their food.

Moderator Cut. You and your wife need to stop being so riled up over things that are just not a big deal.

Last edited by Jaded; 09-07-2013 at 02:39 AM.. Reason: Inappropriate comment
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Old 09-05-2013, 10:20 PM
 
Location: NC
502 posts, read 698,006 times
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If this is a habit of the child's, consider only giving her small bites of food to see she is really hungry. For instance, she could have broken off a small piece of cheese. If granddaughter doesn't eat it, then don't give her any more.
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Old 09-06-2013, 08:51 AM
 
501 posts, read 708,552 times
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I would not make a big deal of things that don't involve damage to house, injury to people or animals, or theft of possessions.

If the kid is unruly, you can stop inviting them over.

If they don't come often, you can put up with poor behavior in order to enjoy them. They probably enjoy them to.

If they come over often, and are unruly, then you can expect to put down some rules. But, recognize that parents may not come over again.
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Old 09-06-2013, 05:22 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
17,063 posts, read 17,382,869 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jojow View Post
If this is a habit of the child's, consider only giving her small bites of food to see she is really hungry. For instance, she could have broken off a small piece of cheese. If granddaughter doesn't eat it, then don't give her any more.
Good point. Also the girl is four years old. Very few normal, well behaved four year olds tear up food and throw it on the ground. Toddlers may play with food and throw it but not four year olds. After my kids were 18 months, or maybe 2 years, I don't recall them ever just throwing food on the floor. Even if it was something on their plate that they tried and didn't like they just didn't throw it.



I looked at this situation not like food being wasted but as a child being defiant to an adult. Grandma said "That is my cheese that I am going to eat later." Child whines and whines until she gets it and then deliberately tears it apart and throws it on the ground. How is that different than if Grandma had a letter or a photograph and the grandchild just tore it apart and threw the pieces on the ground? Or if Grandma was drinking a glass of milk and the child demands it or grabs it away from Grandma and dumps it on the floor so that no one can have it.

The OP didn't say that the child took a bite and didn't like it, after she received the cheese she immediately tore it apart and threw it on the ground without even tasting the cheese. That sounds more like defiance than an "eating problem".

Saying "Ignore it, a slice of cheese doesn't cost very much" or "Just buy more cheese" won't help a defiance problem.

Last edited by germaine2626; 09-06-2013 at 05:36 PM..
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Old 09-06-2013, 10:56 PM
 
1,472 posts, read 1,995,633 times
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Well Sons Girlfriend has a Job, has to quit because in interferes with her swimming.

Granddaughter is in Preschool she don't like it because it interferes with her swimming wonder where she gets this from.

My wife fixed Granddaughters plate the other day, gave her a couple bites of all, she could have more if she wanted. Her Mom got mad started throwing dirty dishes on Granddaughters plate

brushrunner
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Old 09-07-2013, 04:48 AM
 
Location: Bloomington IN
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I don't think this post is about a piece of cheese and a 4 year old. I think it's about the immature mother of a grandchild.
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:34 AM
 
Location: Location: Location
6,353 posts, read 7,834,865 times
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This is the result of "giving in" to children and grandchildren. Grandma could easily have said, "No, dear, this is my lunch. I have some cereal/crackers/etc. that you may have instead."

I remember being at a banquet for Cub Scouts and the first course was fruit cocktail. Each dish had a cherry on top. Every kid at the table wanted Mom (or Dad) to give the kid the cherry from their dish. And they all did. Except me. In the first place, I wanted it. In the second place, my kid didn't even like the cherries and was only asking because all the others were asking.

If my child needed a kidney, I'd give it up. If that cherry was the only thing preventing starvation, the kid could have it. But until, and unless, we begin to teach our children that sometimes you don't get what you want just because you want it, there will be incidents of cheese-throwing.
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Old 09-07-2013, 08:35 PM
 
1,472 posts, read 1,995,633 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rrah View Post
I don't think this post is about a piece of cheese and a 4 year old. I think it's about the immature mother of a grandchild.
Probably right.

brushrunner
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