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How do you figure? The brain is a part of the body like any other organ or limb.
My point is that a 12 year old girl who is more physically developed than her peers is not more advanced mentally than her peers. If that were the case all the boys and girls who had went through puberty the fastest would be filling the advanced track classes in junior high....that isn't the case.
It is obvious that whoever wrote this post is either:
a) someone who has had sex with a minor and is trying to justify it or shift blame to ease his concience
b) someone who has a fetish for teen girls he would like to act on and is trying to look for enough reasons why it is 'ok' before he gives himself permission to.
If you have been involved in this sort of thing, learn from it and dont do it again. Then you can forgive yourself and move on.
You are old enough to know better. If a minor is acting sexually aggressive and putting herself out there in that way, you can bet there is an underlying problem. You would be better off encouraging her to get counselling than taking advantage of her being so vulnerable.
Minors make advances or attempt to pursue older men for several reasons including attemts to recieve attention and approval from an older father type figure if there is no father around, and also teens who have been abused can engage in deliberately high risk sexualised behaviours as a way of reliving the trauma- a kind of self abuse and destructive cycle. I know this too well.
In my case I was 14 when I hit on, and subsequently had a one night stand with a 31 year old man (which turned into a long term relationship). I tried to impress him by doing everything I thought he wanted as I was afraid of being alone again. I had been abandoned by my parents. I thought he was my rock. I very much loved and idolised him.
I know for a fact that I would never have hit on him and offered him sex had I not been a past victim of sexual abuse. I was very sexually destructive. This probably came accross to him as my being extremely into sex, as I would fake orgasms etc like any other woman, however I really didnt enjoy it.
The first thing I did when I met him was offer him oral sex. I know that is tempting for any man, however he had the option of saying no. You dont say yes if you are married, you dont say yes if it is a small child, you dont say yes it if is your best freinds wife. There are ethical boundaries you dont cross. I forgive him for our first sexual encounter but I dont forgive him for having time to think, and choosing to continue seeing me.
My childhood sexual abuse was linked to the statutory rape as I would never have dreamed of acting so provocatively had I not been groomed to do so from a very young age.
I became pregnant within months of meeting him.
The insult is that I lost my childhood due to being sexually abused- and then I went on to lose my adoloecence and youth to statutory rape. I didnt get to do the normal things teens could do.
One of the most damaging things about statutory rape is the power imbalances.
There is clear power imbalances between minors and adults.
He had a lot of control over me. He held my physical emotional and social wellbeing in his hand. I was not allowed to see friends, I was not allowed to look after my own finances, he turned me against my family. On the other hand he also loved me, I believe that despite what others say. Thats why I stayed for so long.
He would tell me that bills cost more than they did and I didnt know. I had nothing and he spent my money on himself. Pot, expensive coffee whatever else. There were times where we had no power and I believed, due to my young age, that it was just because we were poor.
He could tell me anything and I believed it.
I also had to lie. I had to lie to everyone at time, my family and friends about seeing him at first, and then about his age, and they to centrelink as he said he would be arrested if I told them I knew who the father was, then to the 'couple friends' we made to say I was older or else people would be creeped out. Living a lie, and having to cover for someone is traumatic in itself. It was so difficult that I would have panic attacks and still do to this day.
I was too young, and not equipped for somebody who was so much older than me that they could manipulate me in any way they wanted. I look back and am so angry that I did not know then what I know now. I was too young to protect myself, to stand up for myself. I was too young to tell a man that I would not stand to be treated that way. I was too young to even know that many of the things that happened were not ok.
There came a time when I left because the control was so great. It was only then that I was able to finally get an education as he was too jelouse to 'let me' do what I wanted when we were together and I was too young to see that was wrong- he took advantage of that.
Its very hard to get an education, and to work with a young child as a single mother. Now I earn a living, however only enough to raise a teenager. It doesnt go on hair, nails and cocktails like most women in thier twenties. I have never had anything for me. I was thrust into an adult world too young and was always behind the eight ball. I never had a fun and exciting life. I had a struggle.
I am 29, with a 14 year old child, and a lot of emotional baggage.
I believed it was consential until I grew up.
I would have told you until I was blue in the face that it was real love, that we were meant to be, that he saved me from my deamons. Now I see that if somebody had of gotten me help for my sexualised behaviurs when I was a teen I could have dealt with my childhood abuse. I could have had a youth. I might have something for me- some money, some time, something for all they work I put in just to survive.
NOTE:
Teens who engage in sexualised behaviours in this post have been incorrectly reffered to as women.
They are not women.
Teens are not women! They are children- brain scans of teens confirm that their brains are not fully- or even nearly completely developed.
Elizabeth234, your story is tragic. I am so sorry.
The notion that 18 year old males with 16 year old girlfriends are even remotely close to your situation is insane.
I would be a lot happier if all states had Romeo and Juliet laws - say a 3 year age difference. Then absolutely idiotic scenarios like prosecuting a 19 year old for dating a 17 year old high school would not happen.
I also believe the age of consent should be 16. I do not believe that imparting self worth and sexual boundaries to our kids is the business of state government; at the same time, there are true predators out there, and someone under 16 is still riding their bike because they can't drive, still in the throes of puberty, etc.
We should consider that marriage and childbearing has happened as early as 13 or 14 throughout history. Now, I'm thankful that we've moved beyond that! But the simple act of sexual intercourse is not magically damaging simply because someone has not yet moved beyond the imaginary line in the sand that we all pretend is crossed at age 18. It really is all about the individual circumstances, and whether the young person in question is respected and valued.
Finally, I would love to see a provision for records to be expunged or sealed under certain circumstances. A certain length of supervised time passing without any offenses; a post-pubescent "victim"; some evidence that the act was consenting, etc.
How often do these scenarios happen, I wonder? The outrage that I feel for a young man whose life is ruined because some girl had a fake ID is real, but are we talking about some tiny percentage of statutory rape charges? Does anyone know?
Rapists and pedophiles are.sex offenders and deserve both the punishment they receive as well as the stigma of the label. Statutory rape is simply not the same. The recidivism rate for those convicted of statutory rape is smaller than any other crime, 3% or less. Time to make a distinction. We forget that despite the age issue the "victim" is consenting and often the.instigator.
Recently came across this study which may answer the OP's question.
Quote:
Two studies have investigated the association between age difference and aspects of females' sexual debut. Abma and colleagues used 1995 NSFG data to examine partner age difference in the context of measuring "wantedness" of first intercourse. Their findings suggested that wantedness is inversely related to the age difference between a young woman and her partner, and that it may be related to her limited control over the situation.6 Furthermore, Leitenberg and Saltzman found that among females who had had first sexual intercourse at ages 11-12, those who had a partner five or more years their senior had an elevated risk of attempted suicide, substance abuse and pregnancy. Among females who had had first intercourse between the ages of 13 and 15, having older partners was associated only with truancy. In contrast, among females whose age at first intercourse was 16-18, having older partners was not linked to these negative outcomes. Thus, adverse effects of partner age difference may lessen as females mature.7
There was a thread here a few days ago where the topic of statutory rape came up. Some posters thought that statutory rape is a serious crime that has far reaching implications for the victim. This seems to be a belief that a lot of people hold - that the young person is damaged for life from their experience. I really wonder if that is generally the case though or if statutory rape laws really have more to do with society's view on sex than the implications for the "victim". Is a 14-15-year old girl really harmed by having a sexual relationship with an 18-19-year old boy or even an older man? Why would it be more damaging for a 15-year old to have sex with a 20-year old than another 15-year old?
Also, if statutory rape is damaging to the younger person is it different for boys and girls? There has been a lot of talk about the female teachers who have had sex with male students and some seem to be of the opinion that the boys are harmed by the experience while others argue that they are just living every teenage boy's dream to have sex with the teacher. You never hear that argument when it comes to girls though. They are always victims and considered to have been taken advantage of. Couldn't some of the girls be living their dream to have sex with an older, sexy guy?
What do you think? Are the teenagers damaged victims or willing participants who are just fine with it?
( last sentence )...........NO..........................YES
How do adolescent males view their sexual relationships with adult females? Some studies show that if the relationship was not forced and the female adult was not a relative, a majority of males viewed these relationships as positive (Condy et al., 1987; Okami, 1991), about a third viewed them as neutral (Fromuth & Burkhart, 1987; Okami, 1991), and a minority (b5%) viewed them as negative (Fromuth & Burkhart, 1987). Nonetheless, they had slightly elevated levels of psychological distress: they had slightly more psychological, alcohol, and deliberate self-harming behavior problems than men without such experiences, but they were not as distressed as those who experienced forced sexual encounters (King et al., 2003).
^^^
This may be repetitious, if so I apologize. Many states have laws that make exceptions for people close in age, say 2-4 years, if one is over the age of consent and one isn't.
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Misinformed
