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I don't care about studies or what people say, whether couples are happier with or without children depends on the couple and many are not going to answer honestly...It also depends, which has been pointed out: why are these couples childless and how will they feel with they are in thier senior years. Will they regret not having children? We have 3 children, one chosse not to have children of her own; for she and her husband it was the best choice. She is a loving daughter, wonderful wife and her husband is caring and kind. They are also very opinionated, only see black and white, don't have any pets either, can't stand to see even a dish out of place and love their freedom. They have the funds to travel when they want and where they want, they own a business and for the most part are totally happy or appear to be. Children would not have fit into their lifestyle. Our older daughter would have been miserable without her 2 daughthers. Our son falls in the middle. He has 2 children from a prvious marriage, that he supports financually even more than the courts ordered but he isn't there for either of them emotionally. He doesn't have much time for his younger son either as his job takes him all over the country 70% of the time. Even though he does love his kids, I almost think he would have been better off without kids, though he really wanted to be a father.
For us, not having kids would have been the end for us. We wanted them, we had our first daughter, had 2 premies that didn't live and eventually adopted our 2 younger children. I can't imagine not having them, any of them.
Honestly, I'd probably be less happy if I DID have children.
I have goals in life, places to go, things to learn, etc. A child has no place in my foreseeable future.
For what it's worth, if I did want children, I would adopt. The world is already overpopulated. To me, there is no point to bringing more children into the world when millions are out there starving now. It's pointless unless you're dead set on keeping your bloodline going (which to me, screams "inflated sense of self-worth" way more than a couple deciding that having children won't fit into their lifestyle).
My wife and I don't have children.
We don't hate them but we knew we would be far better off financially without the burden of them.
I'm stating this as a matter of fact that we have far more money and look much younger than our mid forties counterparts with children.
I'm very sure we are much much happier then those that constantly worry about money and about the welfare of a child or children.
In life you need to know what you want and then stay with your decision.
Yeah, I agree that kids would be about the worst thing possible if you didn't want 'em.
I have various thoughts on the subject. AFA my own children, they turned out great. Independent, happy, master degrees, some with children. Very considerate of us as parents. BUT looking back, not sure if I would have done it again.
A friend has 3 children, they live within a mile of parents, they are happy to have grandchildren visit. A lot of their life revolves around them.
Another friend has 4 children, 1 biological that lives on the other side of the US, 3 who belong to her deceased husband, who chose to be a Bank. Now husband is deceased these 50 yo plus "children" are in debt and still looking for handouts from his widow. She is not at all happy with the situation.
Still another friend had no children. They are a bit lonely in their senior years and although they don't seem to regret not having children, there seems to be something missing from their lives. They have several dogs and cats and they love them like children.
I think raising children is one of the most difficult jobs in the world. It's expensive, time-consuming, emotionally and physically exhausting, and the rewards, though few, make it worthwhile. I guess it's like a throw of dice, you just never know.
Hehe, I just came from the abortion debate thread where there were some childless and happy posters.
Of course it depends on the couple. Some people enjoy living a spontaneous life of being able to pack up and go anywhere and do anything without having to worry about a kid. Or not having to pay thousands to raise it. Spending that money on other things which make them happy.
Some people really want a biological child but can't have one because they're infertile.
At the end of the day, it's the couple's choice. There is one thing which shouldn't be a choice though: do NOT have a child just because you think it's the "normal" thing to do or just because you feel pressured to.
Me, well. It's hard for me to make a decision yet.
I generally find kids very annoying and have uttered that I "hate" them more than once (or twenty...or probably fifty) times in my life. But sometimes I come across a very cute child or a well behaved one and it makes me change my mind! I want to travel as much as I can and live a spontaneous life, and spend money on things for myself and my future boyfriend/husband, and not be tied down with kids. But, at the same time, I want to raise a mini-me and see it develop into a successful, happy adult. I'm scared of realizing I want one one day but being far too old for one. Or feeling regretful for not having one.
Maybe it's because I'm still so damn young that I feel this way...
Any of you ever felt like you don't want kids or like they'll take away your freedom, but one you got older changed your mind?
People can only experience from one side or the other (child free or parent). Anyone who thinks they "know" the correct answer for everyone based on their own limited experience is wrong. One's personal opinion/view is correct for that person ONLY. People who advocate strongly for either lifestyle are attempting to validate their choices and belittle others who made different ones.
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