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Acting on one's attraction towards a young teen--puberty or not--is wrong. Even if it's not "pedophile" there should be a word for "attraction to young naive virginal people" and it shouldn have a negative connotation. I think anyone who gets sexually excited because the person is young, naive, and virginal is a predator and therapy should exist to address this condition.
Because here's what's left out of the conversation about "what makes one a pedophile and how do we define it"...the innocent, still developing human being at the receiving end of this attraction. This entire notion of who "men" find sexually attractive just perpetuate the maddening condition of women solely existing for man's sexual pleasure.
So even a 15/16 year old, as gorgeous as they may be, should not be in any type of sexual relationship with a grown adult (Romeo and Juliette laws make a lot of since to me--allowing for a discrepancy around the late teen years i.e. an 18 year old and 15 year old is understandable, but a 16 year old and a 24 year old is too much of an age difference) They are more than just "hot bodies" or even giggly, energetic young people. They are individuals still in the throes of adolescence, still developing their minds and opinions and views on the world; and they should be left alone by predatory adults while they figure all that out.
This is absolutely correct. An adult has no business interfering in the life of a teen in that way. It is predatory.
Many people think if the teen looks mature or seems to like the attention then it's green light-go to give them attention but obviously the teen doesn't know the consequences, they are still learning and the adult knows that, therefore it is wrong and there is always a power imbalance.
I'm not sure it is even biologically normal for adults to be attracted to even older teens as their bodies are not fully developed yet, the growth to a fully adult body continues into the twenties and teen bodies have more complications with pregnancy than a fully developed adult body.
There's an elephant in the room. Through my years I've noticed a very particular group that LOVE to fuel this debate: obese, frumpy, older ladies and mothers that are not on the same plane as these teens that attract older men. There's definitely some jealousy here. There's one quintessential example I remember vividly:
I was at a crowded beach and nearby was what appeared to be a single mom, her teenage daughter (maybe 15 or 16) and her friend. They were both confident, tanned, and ripe as a peach. Strutted up and down the beach like they owned the place. They got quite a few smiles and seemed to be enjoying the attention. The mother, on the other hand was a little overweight, wrinkly, but not unattractive by any means..... you could just tell that her best years were well behind her. She would scowl at men that gawked at the girls as they tanned, wave hopped, or did somersaults. 2 athletic young men were wave hopping near them and seemed to be chatting a little bit. When they got out the mother told them that they were only 16. It was terribly awkward but their response was basically "so what?" I heard one of them call her jealous and I had to agree. There was nothing inappropriate taking place. The girls weren't in "danger" from what I could tell and the guys were doing the leaving anyway. Overprotectedness? Doubtful ....jealousy? Probably. I could just see the mother telling anybody who would listen about the "pedophiles" she encountered
There's an elephant in the room. Through my years I've noticed a very particular group that LOVE to fuel this debate: obese, frumpy, older ladies and mothers that are not on the same plane as these teens that attract older men. There's definitely some jealousy here. There's one quintessential example I remember vividly:
I was at a crowded beach and nearby was what appeared to be a single mom, her teenage daughter (maybe 15 or 16) and her friend. They were both confident, tanned, and ripe as a peach.
And there you have it. Coming out of the woodwork.
Hmm, suppose it is a fat, frumpy dad looking out for his teen daughter, is he also "jealous"? Moms cannot care about keeping the creepers away from their kids? The girls were not "confident" as much as youthfully naïve. They were having fun on the beach as you do when you are a kid. You bring forth all the points and justifications that pedophiles use, even if attraction to teens is not formally labeled pedophilia. It's a nasty ugly thing to accuse a mother of that and just a deflection to excuse inappropriately ogling young teens.
And there you have it. Coming out of the woodwork.
Hmm, suppose it is a fat, frumpy dad looking out for his teen daughter, is he also "jealous"? Moms cannot care about keeping the creepers away from their kids? The girls were not "confident" as much as youthfully naïve. They were having fun on the beach as you do when you are a kid. You bring forth all the points and justifications that pedophiles use, even if attraction to teens is not formally labeled pedophilia. It's a nasty ugly thing to accuse a mother of that and just a deflection to excuse inappropriately ogling young teens.
I agree with that statement I speak as a father of teenage daughters unfortunately I've caught some of these pervs occasionally oogling my daughters to be honest it brings out the warrior in me and once they catch my glance it's pretty obvious I mean business. I would warn these guys to watch yourselves you may cross paths with the wrong father one of these days and you may pay for it dearly.
A few hears back, at the HS in the small town I was raised in, there were three girls, two 17 and one within a month of it, were all three having sexual relations with a 24 yo male teacher. Of course it got out, one of the girls told a couple other girls, who then told others and so on. My some was a junior at the time, and he knew about it. Needless to say the four involved were outed, in the end.
I was quite the flap and shedding of feathers. Being as the oldest of the three girls was the daughter of a rather prominent "pillar of the community", the explosive charge was instantly made nuclear, and the explosion spread fallout all over the whole.valley, and the town was a smoking crater. All three girls proudly and adamantly insisted everything that happened was entirely consensual, and that they were the instigators, and had planned and implemented the initial encounter, involving all three of them, at once, seducing the guy. The oldest girl was only a month or so from beings 18, , and all three of them were quite insistent that the whole thing was their idea. They never recanted a bit of that.
The teacher, being only barely being out of being just a kid himself, at least from the take of an old guy like me, was quite unable to control such a bold and massively ...insistent.., and totally willing and able advance by three very aggressive girls. Girls who were developed far beyond their years. Another fantasy encounter, dragged into a stark reality. Even though the girls insisted, to the end, that they were in no manner coerced, and that the teacher was clueless as to their intentions until he was suddenly being ...physically ..handled by very insistent and more than physically attractive and developed young women.
He was doomed. At only 24, himself, his will and self control were just steamrolled. The power in the community that formed against him, via the oldest girls father, was also a steamroller. More of a mobile artillery division. He didn't ha e a prayer of coming out of this intact, regardless. This had went on for a while. The girls both individually, and as a group, visiting him many times for ...good times, and wanting nothing more than to do so. Was this guy a pedophile? I hardly think so. However, he was certainly scorified as one, and his career
I had met the guy a few times. He was my sons physical science teacher. He was , ineed, a very good looking young man, quite professional, and , from the interactions I had with him, seemed a fine asset to the school. Alas, not near old enough to even be able to hold a trip on the situation he was faced with, and clueless, being new to town, the cliquish power he was vetting on the foul end of. No charges were filed, there was no legal precedence, since everything that happened took place off school grounds, but he was fired, and his teaching career was pretty much history, and, of course, forced to leave town. To the girls credit, they never claimed victimhood, and stood by their ascertion that they instigated the whole thing.
Just a few months further, and there would have been no involvement with the school and the teachers job. That doesn't mean that the power the girls fathers wielded in the community wouldn't have made the teachers life a living Hell, though. There was no crime here, just three young, fully aware and completely willing women ( yes... women, despite their age, of which all were within legal consent) engaging in consensual sex. Unconventional, though each also visited the guy individually as well, but there was no crime in any of it.
This guy was certainly no pedophile. Pretty much just a normal enough young, male human. I knew these girls, from school functions they were in my son with a and the oldest girls father and I often did business together as we both owned and operated contracting businesses, in the same field, and operated to mutual benefit, though his was a much larger operation, and he carried a bit more clout in the community. Unfortunately, for the young teacher, enough to call down a highly placed favor or two.
Was this teacher a pedophile? Hardly. But he was blatantly, and admittedly seduced by the wrong girls. Made a mess of things for him.
This topic has absolutely no relevance to me. As a married man, I'm not supposed to be attracted to anyone, no matter their age. Heck, depending on her mood sometimes I'm not even supposed to be attracted to my wife! (But other times, I'd better be. )
Some of the legal definitions come into play as well. When a man goes after a girl who LOOKS like she's 14 to 17, really 18 to 24 because she dressed and did makeup to look much younger, there doesn't seem to be as much disdain for that.
Is that why Harujuku girls and barely-legal porn is so popular and it is common place to see actors in their 20's play roles in high school?
A few hears back, at the HS in the small town I was raised in, there were three girls, two 17 and one within a month of it, were all three having sexual relations with a 24 yo male teacher. Of course it got out, one of the girls told a couple other girls, who then told others and so on. My some was a junior at the time, and he knew about it. Needless to say the four involved were outed, in the end.
I was quite the flap and shedding of feathers. Being as the oldest of the three girls was the daughter of a rather prominent "pillar of the community", the explosive charge was instantly made nuclear, and the explosion spread fallout all over the whole.valley, and the town was a smoking crater. All three girls proudly and adamantly insisted everything that happened was entirely consensual, and that they were the instigators, and had planned and implemented the initial encounter, involving all three of them, at once, seducing the guy. The oldest girl was only a month or so from beings 18, , and all three of them were quite insistent that the whole thing was their idea. They never recanted a bit of that.
The teacher, being only barely being out of being just a kid himself, at least from the take of an old guy like me, was quite unable to control such a bold and massively ...insistent.., and totally willing and able advance by three very aggressive girls. Girls who were developed far beyond their years. Another fantasy encounter, dragged into a stark reality. Even though the girls insisted, to the end, that they were in no manner coerced, and that the teacher was clueless as to their intentions until he was suddenly being ...physically ..handled by very insistent and more than physically attractive and developed young women.
He was doomed. At only 24, himself, his will and self control were just steamrolled. The power in the community that formed against him, via the oldest girls father, was also a steamroller. More of a mobile artillery division. He didn't ha e a prayer of coming out of this intact, regardless. This had went on for a while. The girls both individually, and as a group, visiting him many times for ...good times, and wanting nothing more than to do so. Was this guy a pedophile? I hardly think so. However, he was certainly scorified as one, and his career
I had met the guy a few times. He was my sons physical science teacher. He was , ineed, a very good looking young man, quite professional, and , from the interactions I had with him, seemed a fine asset to the school. Alas, not near old enough to even be able to hold a trip on the situation he was faced with, and clueless, being new to town, the cliquish power he was vetting on the foul end of. No charges were filed, there was no legal precedence, since everything that happened took place off school grounds, but he was fired, and his teaching career was pretty much history, and, of course, forced to leave town. To the girls credit, they never claimed victimhood, and stood by their ascertion that they instigated the whole thing.
Just a few months further, and there would have been no involvement with the school and the teachers job. That doesn't mean that the power the girls fathers wielded in the community wouldn't have made the teachers life a living Hell, though. There was no crime here, just three young, fully aware and completely willing women ( yes... women, despite their age, of which all were within legal consent) engaging in consensual sex. Unconventional, though each also visited the guy individually as well, but there was no crime in any of it.
This guy was certainly no pedophile. Pretty much just a normal enough young, male human. I knew these girls, from school functions they were in my son with a and the oldest girls father and I often did business together as we both owned and operated contracting businesses, in the same field, and operated to mutual benefit, though his was a much larger operation, and he carried a bit more clout in the community. Unfortunately, for the young teacher, enough to call down a highly placed favor or two.
Was this teacher a pedophile? Hardly. But he was blatantly, and admittedly seduced by the wrong girls. Made a mess of things for him.
If this happened in NJ he would have been charged even if the girls were over 18 because he, "was in a position of authority over them." In my area recently there were two women teachers that have been charged over this. If convicted they have to register as sex offenders, can never teach again or have anything to do with children.
I understand it...but I don't. The attraction, I get, I'm attracted to a few types of women, I don't get why, however, nothing about a child seems sexually suitable at all. There's usually nothing there, and I'm not found of skinny women, and a littke girl usually has less than that. I really don't want to sit here and describe an 8yr olds body, you get the point. People are attracted to whatever they're attracted to, it's the premise behind the age, and the generally being a child ai don't get. I tried to get it, Input myself in the situation, the mindset, and it doesn't work. This is just one of those things I think is morally wrong. My mind won't let me thinK about a child sexually, I immediatly wanted to kill myself.
That's because there's nothing sexual to a child. That's why attraction to children is categorized as perverse.
A few hears back, at the HS in the small town I was raised in, there were three girls, two 17 and one within a month of it, were all three having sexual relations with a 24 yo male teacher. Of course it got out, one of the girls told a couple other girls, who then told others and so on. My some was a junior at the time, and he knew about it. Needless to say the four involved were outed, in the end.
I was quite the flap and shedding of feathers. Being as the oldest of the three girls was the daughter of a rather prominent "pillar of the community", the explosive charge was instantly made nuclear, and the explosion spread fallout all over the whole.valley, and the town was a smoking crater. All three girls proudly and adamantly insisted everything that happened was entirely consensual, and that they were the instigators, and had planned and implemented the initial encounter, involving all three of them, at once, seducing the guy. The oldest girl was only a month or so from beings 18, , and all three of them were quite insistent that the whole thing was their idea. They never recanted a bit of that.
How proud their parents must have been, to hear that! (sarcasm) Who raised these girls? How involved in his daughter's upbringing had the "pillar of the community" been? What did the parents do about it, in the end?
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Coming out of the woodwork.
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