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Old 02-05-2009, 12:32 PM
 
Location: Under a bridge.
3,196 posts, read 5,379,192 times
Reputation: 982

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Quote:
Originally Posted by OhioUberAlles View Post
There's always pressure that you can apply. Such as, "become a stripper and you're disowned, we never want to see you again, that's the end of it."

If you raise your kids right, assuming something crazy doesn't happen such as they wind up brainwashed into some whacko cult, they ought to turn out fine. If they go off on some whacko tangent, then cut them off, be glad you have other kids to focus on, and that's that.
"disown" the kids....what kind of person does that make you? Not one that is a loving parent...not one that would be able to lead a child in making moral choices...only one that kids would rebel against....only one that kids SHOULD rebel against. Disgusting attitude that is.
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Old 02-05-2009, 12:56 PM
 
Location: Ocean Shores, WA
5,092 posts, read 14,781,223 times
Reputation: 10865
Default Prostitution! How bad is it really?

When it's good it's very, very good.
But when it's bad, it's horrid.
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Old 02-05-2009, 01:02 PM
 
Location: Ohio
1,008 posts, read 869,055 times
Reputation: 250
Quote:
Originally Posted by dcashley View Post
"disown" the kids....what kind of person does that make you? Not one that is a loving parent...not one that would be able to lead a child in making moral choices...only one that kids would rebel against....only one that kids SHOULD rebel against. Disgusting attitude that is.

There's something called tough love. If your kid winds up dealing drugs at age 16, or strangling cats and dogs, starting fires, molesting girls, etc (acting like Ted Bundy), you don't hug them and tell them how great they are.

Classic example, when Cain killed Abel, if Adam had been willing to rise to the occasion he would have smote Cain for the crime of fratricide.

Love is always conditional, based upon deserving it and being worthy of it. The idea that you love somebody no matter how awful they are, is trashy hollywood nonsense. People are the sum of their experiences, thoughts, and actions, if the sum of their experiences, thoughts, and actions makes them a vile and disgusting crud, then you don't treat them like they're an angel, because they're not.

If I had a daughter and she decided to become a crack *****, well first of all I'd probably have massively failed in raising her (but that aside, I digress), I would disown her on the spot. Assuming you raise your kids right, if they become total losers, you have every right to disown them, indeed you have an obligation to disown them, or else it sends a message to your normal kids, and your normal grandchildren, "hey you can become a total loser, shrug off your responsibilities, and you'll still be accepted, there won't be any consequences!"

I want the message to be, "okay, you make a few mistakes, fine, work through it... If you become a total loser and a screw-up, some dope fiend, or a drug-dealer, a pedophile, or the next Ted Bundy, you can go rot in the ditch alongside the road for all I care..."

I'm not talking about the basically good kid who wrecks the car driving fast to impress his friends, I'm talking about the kid who has "working girls" turning tricks on the corner while he pushes dope and fences stolen property.
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Old 02-05-2009, 03:23 PM
 
472 posts, read 737,400 times
Reputation: 201
Well, a breaking story is unfolding right now that might be applicable to this thread.

I report.

You decide.




We support Obama's Stimulus Package!!!
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Old 02-05-2009, 04:36 PM
 
Location: Virginia Beach
8,346 posts, read 7,017,547 times
Reputation: 2874
Quote:
Originally Posted by OhioUberAlles View Post

I'm not talking about the basically good kid who wrecks the car driving fast to impress his friends, I'm talking about the kid who has "working girls" turning tricks on the corner while he pushes dope and fences stolen property.
Even if my child became a mass murderer, I would not disown her. I'd back their punishment, but I would still love her. I love her unconditionally, no matter what she would do. She is my daughter until the end of time, end of story.
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Old 02-05-2009, 05:11 PM
 
Location: Under a bridge.
3,196 posts, read 5,379,192 times
Reputation: 982
Quote:
Originally Posted by OhioUberAlles View Post
There's something called tough love..
Tough love is still love...it ISN"T disowning your kids.
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Old 02-05-2009, 08:21 PM
 
Location: Ohio
1,008 posts, read 869,055 times
Reputation: 250
Quote:
Originally Posted by Langlen View Post
Even if my child became a mass murderer, I would not disown her. I'd back their punishment, but I would still love her. I love her unconditionally, no matter what she would do. She is my daughter until the end of time, end of story.

If my kid was a serial rapist/killer who raped and murdered women, and it was definitively proven/established they were really guilty, I would tell him to burn in hell and then shoot him myself, before apologizing to the next-of-kin of his victims, for the fact that somebody I helped bring into the world did such horrible things.

Justice doesn't get turned off just because family is involved. The same justice that is applied in regards to a stranger should be applied to anybody, regardless of their relation to me or their relation to anybody else for that matter.

I am a firm believer in the bible, and the bible is very clear about what a father is expected to do to a worthless renegade/rogue son, or a worthless harlot daughter. I only regret that our present government has usurped the father's role in dispensing justice. It is not the government's job or mandate to police society, is the job of every household head to police his own family. When the head of the household fails, or if he is unwilling to police his family, then the community/congregation picks up the slack.

And no, this isn't a trolling post meant to get a rise out of people, my beliefs come straight out of Deuteronomy. If my son was a worthless killer/rapist/degenerate I would want him publicly executed [or at least the authority/approval/option to have him executed at my discretion] (preferrably by being stoned to death although hanging would also be acceptable). The same goes for any daughter of mine who becomes a harlot.
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Old 02-05-2009, 08:25 PM
 
Location: southern california
61,289 posts, read 87,129,640 times
Reputation: 55550
many are married to prostitutes and dont know it.
many date them and dont know it.
the prostitute is not just the girl on the corner.
as to forced prostitution i think that slavery has never left us and that
those that cry the loudest about it, their own communities are the main
practitioners of it.
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Old 02-05-2009, 09:24 PM
 
Location: Pinal County, Arizona
25,100 posts, read 39,145,609 times
Reputation: 4937
Quote:
Originally Posted by OhioUberAlles View Post
There's always pressure that you can apply. Such as, "become a stripper and you're disowned, we never want to see you again, that's the end of it."
I would not, and could not, do that to my children.

I would have a "heart to heart" - but the ultimate decision is with my child.

Regardless of their choice, I would continue to love them with all my heart and always be there for them.

No questions asked
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Old 02-05-2009, 09:32 PM
 
Location: Ohio
1,008 posts, read 869,055 times
Reputation: 250
Quote:
Originally Posted by Greatday View Post
I would not, and could not, do that to my children.

I would have a "heart to heart" - but the ultimate decision is with my child.

Regardless of their choice, I would continue to love them with all my heart and always be there for them.

No questions asked
Then when your other kids, or your grandchildren with the good kids, see that there are zero consequences for disgusting and horribly wrong choices, that acceptance is unconditional and not attached to behavior, what then?

If somebody is going down a path I cannot follow, I won't follow them.

If I had kids who started using heroin, they wouldn't be welcome in my house until they were either totally clean or serious about getting clean.

I'm not going to rubber stamp somebody's behavior just because they're related to me. That's called enabling, and I refuse to be an enabler. I refuse to help somebody destroy themselves, particularly if I care about them. If you help prop up a loser, you just keep them from hitting rock bottom and you help keep them in that rotten lifestyle all the longer. Most people making crappy or disgusting choices need to be allowed to fall on their face, so they can re-evaluate their situation and decide what they want to do. Those who want help, will seek it out or ask for it, it's enough you be there for them when they are finally ready to accept help. While they're actively self-imploding, it is best you let them know they are persona non-grata, lest a horrid example be set for any other kids/grandkids who might be observing the situation.


Part of the problem in today's society is that parents don't police their kids. Not only do they fail to police them or hold them accountible, they don't raise them properly to begin with. The idea of "no matter what you do, how awful you become, I'm still your dad" sickens me.


The message that sends to all the other kids, "daddy is such a great big doormat that you can walk all over him, do whatever you want, ruin your lives, ruin the lives of your kids, and daddy will still accept you and thus stamp his seal of approval on your conduct by continuing to accept you!"
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