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I am just pointing out the hypocrisy that we take time out of our day to talk about this one kid when in the grand scheme of things we really do not care. But please, go ahead and talk about this 'tragedy'...
... people really need to gain some perspective
And, you know that part, that I picked apart, is exactly what I agree with. The comparison is apples and oranges, not even close, not in the same ball park etc. So, I had to.
As my heart goes out to the boy and his family, I think there was more to this than what's on the surface. Perhaps there were other factors that led to his suicide that went undiagnosed? The bullying may have been just one of several issues in his life.
I question this school's outstanding anti-bullying program. If it was so great than the bullying would have stopped long ago. I think Camping!'s example of her daughter's school is a good example of an effective program. One that actually drags the parents in with the kid and follows through with the promise of suspension and expulsion. Part of the problem is that bullies tend to have a weak parent figure at home that doesn't discipline their children, or in some cases abuse their children and those kids take it out on other kids.
I think a zero tolerance policy needs to be established for all forms of bullying and discrimination in schools everywhere. If a school would not tolerate someone calling a black kid the N-word, show the same degree of intolerance towards those that taunt kids with gay slurs.
Ok, this is not dircted towards you, it just fits my mood for the day. I just happen to be over it, today. You just got lucky. I am just blowing off steam.
It must be the parents fault. Sometimes it is. This frigging isn't. This is not ok. Go to a paper that allows someone to comment on an article. Go to the fashion, parenting or relationship forum. We spend a good portion of our time picking each other to pieces, shredding each other, degrading each other, telling each other how we should live. And then 17 thousand ways to say whose responsibility it is. So busy pin-pointing whose fault it is so that you get to escape the consequences. It is you and you and you and you and you. Do not get confused. It is not .......who is to blame? It is recognize your contribution to the overall picture.
The kids responsible should be lined up and beaten to a pulp in front of their parents.
The administrators if guilty should be fired.
Incredibly tragic. The kid looks just like one of my nephews. Some people wonder why parents want their kids in private schools. All kids should be able to learn in school without distractions and bullying should not be tolerated. If I had been this boy's father, I would've known exactly what he was going through at school the first time it happened, and I would've pulled him out of there and put him in a better environment. Maybe the parents couldn't afford to do this. Damn shame. Seems odd though that such a young kid would hang themselves like that though. One wonders what else was going on. I wish I could've helped that kid. I love kids.
When my daughter was seven, we pulled her out of the Catholic school and put her in the public school right around the corner from our house. Million dollars homes so one would expect the school to reflect good values right? She didn't want to go there but she trusted our judgment and tried to make it work. She tried to connect with her teacher, even though her "teacher" was switched five times in 2 weeks. I picked her up everyday and monitored the situation closely. Every day I asked her about her day and her experiences at recess. She told me that a boy had thrown dirt on her and another tried to throw juice on her. Didn't take me but a minute to realize that she was encountering some problem kids in this school. A few days later, I went to pick her up and she was crying. The teacher was holding her hand and told me that she lost her lunch box. I knew differently however. I knew that the reason that she was crying was because she was unhappy with the school. The teachers didn't seem to give a damn. Immigrant parents wouldn't let their kids bond with other kids outside their ethnic group. Parents avoided contact with one another. Bad kids went unchecked during recess. The school failed her and therefore failed us. We pulled her out of there that week. Big mistake that will never happen again.
We put her in another Catholic school near our home. There, the teachers embraced her and the kids in her class made her feel welcome. She's happy and thriving. No distractions and no kids whose parents have for whatever reason failed them.
Where oh where pray tell did I blame the victim? I merely said he was incapable of coping with the situation and that his parents didn't come to his aid.
Where did I say he was asking for it? WHERE? Quote me, I challenge you. Truth is, you can't, because I didn't say that. All I said was that bullying is a normal albeit unhappy part of growing up. It ties in to kids learning how to socialize and how to find where they rank in the pack that is the human race. Everyone has to deal with it at one time or another. Some kids learn how to avoid it or deflect it, others don't. There's no blame on the victim there at all, just a statement of plain fact.
So before you go putting words in my mouth again (so to speak) READ what I posted and grok that nowhere in there did I say the kid deserved it or that he asked for it. Please. I'm outspoken enough that if that's what I meant, I would have said it outright and damn the torpedoes.
You are right, you didn't say that. I did infer that from the tone of your post, but inferring and tone really don't mean squat. So for that, I do apologize.
Nonetheless, if I am reading you right you are saying that since everyone gets bullied at one time or another and since most people are able to overcome it/deal with it, then this kids suicide reflects more on his inability to cope then bullying itself.
Sure, everything there is factual. But then so is saying most people have driven drunk at one time or another, and most people don't get into accidents and those that do are pretty rare in the grand scheme of things. Therefore there is nothing wrong with drunk driving?
Basically ;Bullying is a growing problem in schools as to the number of cases. Just as violence is growing in schools and its not just at grade school levels;college campus have a problem.IMO its just a reflection of more general problems that are in our society as seen in the common places of our society.
Incredibly tragic. The kid looks just like one of my nephews. Some people wonder why parents want their kids in private schools. All kids should be able to learn in school without distractions and bullying should not be tolerated. If I had been this boy's father, I would've known exactly what he was going through at school the first time it happened, and I would've pulled him out of there and put him in a better environment. Maybe the parents couldn't afford to do this. Damn shame. Seems odd though that such a young kid would hang themselves like that though. One wonders what else was going on. I wish I could've helped that kid. I love kids.
When my daughter was seven, we pulled her out of the Catholic school and put her in the public school right around the corner from our house. Million dollars homes so one would expect the school to reflect good values right? She didn't want to go there but she trusted our judgment and tried to make it work. She tried to connect with her teacher, even though her "teacher" was switched five times in 2 weeks. I picked her up everyday and monitored the situation closely. Every day I asked her about her day and her experiences at recess. She told me that a boy had thrown dirt on her and another tried to throw juice on her. Didn't take me but a minute to realize that she was encountering some problem kids in this school. A few days later, I went to pick her up and she was crying. The teacher was holding her hand and told me that she lost her lunch box. I knew differently however. I knew that the reason that she was crying was because she was unhappy with the school. The teachers didn't seem to give a damn. Immigrant parents wouldn't let their kids bond with other kids outside their ethnic group. Parents avoided contact with one another. Bad kids went unchecked during recess. The school failed her and therefore failed us. We pulled her out of there that week. Big mistake that will never happen again.
We put her in another Catholic school near our home. There, the teachers embraced her and the kids in her class made her feel welcome. She's happy and thriving. No distractions and no kids whose parents have for whatever reason failed them.
I'm glad your school is working for you.
I had the exact opposite experience. One of my daughters was bullied unmercifully in a catholic school from kindergarten thru fourth grade. We talked, we met with the teachers, I talked with the girls parents. The only advice I was given was that my dd needed to stand up for herself and besides, the bully had a 'bad homelife'.
Now all of my children go to public schools and they actually take bullying very seriously. But then, they had a spate of suicides and connection with a mass murderer to propel them into it.
I am just pointing out the hypocrisy that we take time out of our day to talk about this one kid when in the grand scheme of things we really do not care. Whats the bigger tragedy, that one kid in Illinois had everything (as far as necessities like drinking water, medication etc) and decided to take his life, or that 25,000 (as in an entire sold out arena's worth or kids) children die from causes that are EASILY TREATABLE, those kids do not get a choice, they just have the misfortune of being born into the third world. But please, go ahead and talk about this 'tragedy'...
... people really need to gain some perspective
Uh-huh.
We cannot stop the deaths of starving children, children killed in wars or tribal conflicts, the lack of clean drinking water. Not because we don't care, but because these children live in countries/areas that are controlled by despots that really don't want to change the status quo. Do you know how many times aid organizations attempted to get food to starving children in North Korea only to have the food stolen and given to the army instead?
But this case, this kid and all of the others like him -- this could be stopped. This is within our ability to change.
You are right, some people need to gain perspective, but also an understanding of what is in our control and what is not.
I am just pointing out the hypocrisy that we take time out of our day to talk about this one kid when in the grand scheme of things we really do not care. Whats the bigger tragedy, that one kid in Illinois had everything (as far as necessities like drinking water, medication etc) and decided to take his life, or that 25,000 (as in an entire sold out arena's worth or kids) children die from causes that are EASILY TREATABLE, those kids do not get a choice, they just have the misfortune of being born into the third world. But please, go ahead and talk about this 'tragedy'...
... people really need to gain some perspective
What in God's name are you talking about? Yes there are kids around the world who die under atrocious circumstances. This doesn't mean however that one kid, ANY KID, here in this country who dies for whatever reason, should be ignored because their personal circumstances were not as dire. Unbelievable the rationale you use here.
Any kid who dies prematurely for whatever reason is a tragic occurrence.
Get real.
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I'm outspoken enough that if that's what I meant, I would have said it outright and damn the torpedoes.
