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Old 06-14-2009, 03:26 PM
 
1,779 posts, read 2,037,221 times
Reputation: 616

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Quote:
Originally Posted by melinuxfool View Post
He had his say in it before conception. He could have chosen to keep his fly zipped up.
That is a really closed minded thought...The girl obviously unzipped her pants too. Why does everyone deem the responsibility all on the man...It is a two way deal from the moment the pants drop...it should be a two way deal until the child is 18 years old.

So that man should have to endure 18 years supporting a child even if he didnt want it. But a woman can get an abortion and forget about it. (not all women do this, but it is becoming more popular)

So a woman can escape responsibility but a man can't. Maybe we need to have a mens equal rights movement. It seem the world puts responsibility on all men to act and be great, but when it comes to women...we dont expect much. This is messed up.
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Old 06-14-2009, 04:10 PM
 
6,455 posts, read 9,501,570 times
Reputation: 10764
Quote:
Originally Posted by fracturedman View Post
That is a really closed minded thought...The girl obviously unzipped her pants too. Why does everyone deem the responsibility all on the man...It is a two way deal from the moment the pants drop...it should be a two way deal until the child is 18 years old.

So that man should have to endure 18 years supporting a child even if he didnt want it. But a woman can get an abortion and forget about it. (not all women do this, but it is becoming more popular)

So a woman can escape responsibility but a man can't. Maybe we need to have a mens equal rights movement. It seem the world puts responsibility on all men to act and be great, but when it comes to women...we dont expect much. This is messed up.
Oh, please. How in hell does the woman dodge responsibility just because he was dumb enough to put his wallet at stake? If she's collecting the check, she's also dealing with the ACTUAL kid and day-to-day care and stress. The man actually gets off easy.

Cry me a river.
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Old 06-14-2009, 04:43 PM
 
Location: Chicago- Lawrence and Kedzie/Maywood
2,242 posts, read 5,433,679 times
Reputation: 735
Quote:
Originally Posted by steelstress View Post
Oh, please. How in hell does the woman dodge responsibility just because he was dumb enough to put his wallet at stake? If she's collecting the check, she's also dealing with the ACTUAL kid and day-to-day care and stress. The man actually gets off easy.

Cry me a river.
That's because the man doesn't want the child.
If the women doesn't want it, she can abort instead of paying for 18 years of her life.

She gets off easy.
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Old 06-14-2009, 04:44 PM
 
1,779 posts, read 2,037,221 times
Reputation: 616
Quote:
Originally Posted by steelstress View Post
Oh, please. How in hell does the woman dodge responsibility just because he was dumb enough to put his wallet at stake? If she's collecting the check, she's also dealing with the ACTUAL kid and day-to-day care and stress. The man actually gets off easy.

Cry me a river.
Yes, but a woman can easily at any moment give up the child...from conseption to 18years of age. A man has no choice unless the woman chooses the same outcome. Plus alot of women dont want to be in a relationship with the guy that got her pregnant, but they sure as hell want his money. One of my friends got his GF pregnant and they lived together for a bit, one day he grandma sends her a plane ticket to CA to "visit" she has been down there for 5 years now and he has no way to see his kid, unless he takes time off from work and goes down. He took her to court to get custody or atleast split custody, but her lawyer made him look like an unfit parent becasue he works two jobs and has little free time...the mom has no job and is living with her grandma who has alot of money. Im sorry but this is wrong...

Men really do get the short end of the stick when it comes to the outcome of his child. It seems his only choice is to keep it zipped up, but a woman can unzip when ever she wants and its okay with society.

Men are supposed to be the "responsible ones", If I ever saw a woman take responsability for all her actions I would be suprised. These days well allow women to have freedome from all responsability, but a man has to be responsible or he is seen as a bad guy.
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Old 06-14-2009, 05:07 PM
 
1,704 posts, read 2,950,296 times
Reputation: 592
Quote:
Originally Posted by fracturedman View Post
Yes, but a woman can easily at any moment give up the child...from conseption to 18years of age. A man has no choice unless the woman chooses the same outcome. Plus alot of women dont want to be in a relationship with the guy that got her pregnant, but they sure as hell want his money. One of my friends got his GF pregnant and they lived together for a bit, one day he grandma sends her a plane ticket to CA to "visit" she has been down there for 5 years now and he has no way to see his kid, unless he takes time off from work and goes down. He took her to court to get custody or atleast split custody, but her lawyer made him look like an unfit parent becasue he works two jobs and has little free time...the mom has no job and is living with her grandma who has alot of money. Im sorry but this is wrong...

Men really do get the short end of the stick when it comes to the outcome of his child. It seems his only choice is to keep it zipped up, but a woman can unzip when ever she wants and its okay with society.

Men are supposed to be the "responsible ones", If I ever saw a woman take responsability for all her actions I would be suprised. These days well allow women to have freedome from all responsability, but a man has to be responsible or he is seen as a bad guy.

You ever hear the term "dead beat MOM" in the media? NEVER
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Old 06-14-2009, 07:22 PM
 
Location: Chicago- Lawrence and Kedzie/Maywood
2,242 posts, read 5,433,679 times
Reputation: 735
Wth does that mean?
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Old 06-14-2009, 07:25 PM
 
1,704 posts, read 2,950,296 times
Reputation: 592
It references the idea that men are looked down on when shirking responsibility when the view towards a women when doing the same is decidedly different. That's wth it means.
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Old 06-14-2009, 07:28 PM
 
6,455 posts, read 9,501,570 times
Reputation: 10764
Then you guys have to know, and accept, that the reality is that all the "advantage" is on the woman's side. If you are dumbass enough to risk that, then I'd say you asked for it. Once you guys start dealing with the reality of the situation, the better off you guys will be. But I know, you'd rather risk it than skipping that roll in the hay. Kind of makes you rethink the whole sex without marriage thing, even if just for a moment.

If you guys just read what you guys wrote, you'll see that you actually expect and are entitled to not have to pay after you play. Just how old are you all? 12?

You guys are a reflection of the poor excuses for men we have in this country today. Not that these women are different. Glad I'm not like either one of you.
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Old 06-14-2009, 07:37 PM
 
Location: Bay Area
111 posts, read 280,766 times
Reputation: 142
Regardless of the discussion between the two, ultimately the lady will make the final decision b/c there is no way the man can stop her from doing what she chooses to do........what is most important to me are the reasons for her to keep the baby....if she is keeping it in the hope that he will hang around, then by all mean that is the wrong decision
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Old 06-14-2009, 07:41 PM
 
Location: El Paso, TX
3,302 posts, read 3,754,492 times
Reputation: 2524
Quote:
Originally Posted by indie05 View Post
I keep thinking of this question in my head.

If a girl gets pregnant she has the option to keep the baby or not. The man however does not seem to have any say.... I mean he can't tell her she should keep the baby if she doesn't want it , because it is her body and on the flip side, if he doesn't want to have the baby and she does...her decision trumps...the man is then called a poor father if he is not involved or doesn't support financially... I think that it's not fair to the men.(I am a woman btw)

I don't think saying he fathered the baby and hence is responsible holds any water because as everyone knows ..it takes two to tango....

So it seems to me that men get the shorter end of the stick on this one.
What are your opinions on this?
It is not fair, I agree. BUT...it is not the child's fault. Both took a pregnancy chance when they decide to have sex. Even though she may even have tricked him into it, he IS the father and he created was part of creating that baby.

If I had to make a decision and I make a mistake in making that decision, I would rather err on the child side because that is an inocent life. I do not agree that society has to pick up the tab for the father and the mother. They decided to have sex, they are both responsible for that life.

What I think is somewhat fair is for the law to change and site both parents to give them a chance to claim the child for them and decide who is the one more qualified to keep the child. If the father does not want to have the child, he has no choice, he is the father and he is responsible. If both want the child, there should be equal responsibility for the child and equal parenting thus they both should be able to have the child for court mandated arrangement. The moment one parent starts to put obstacles for the other parent to see the child, he or she looses that right. Also, both parents support the child equally. In other words when the child lives with the father, the mother provides support and the same the other way around.

It is sad to see it this way but in "modern" lifestyles children are paying the price due to so much irresponsible sex out there.

You have a great day.
El Amigo
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