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Old 08-21-2009, 09:40 AM
 
Location: I think my user name clarifies that.
8,293 posts, read 22,457,074 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chromekitty View Post
I think that is incredible!
Good for you guys.
It is great - and thank you!

I cannot imagine not being married. It's wonderful.
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Old 08-21-2009, 11:35 AM
 
3,566 posts, read 4,490,175 times
Reputation: 1846
Quote:
Originally Posted by jungeon View Post
LOL, marriage must be terrible i'd imagine, its like being married to an annoying family member who is always asking you to do stuff for them until you become whiped and have no spine left, and then they accuse you of changing or having no passion left and go and cheat on you. Dam I feel sorry for married people. No wonder they always complain about how their lives suck

And I wonder what was going through your mind as you wrote this.

I wonder what made you think that this was great debate material.
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Old 08-21-2009, 11:56 AM
 
Location: Sango, TN
24,889 posts, read 20,307,565 times
Reputation: 8606
I've seen marriages that have lasted, and those that haven't.

My mother and father were divorced just before their first anniversary. She was 16, and he was 19. They were forced to marry because she was pregnant.

My Grandmother and Grandfather have been married since 1952. Now, I don't believe their marriage is good. My grandfather is a drunk, and he was abusive, and he fooled around, and he did what he wanted. She kept everything running, and my Grandmother is one hell of a woman indeed for putting up with the things she did for so long.

She views things differently than most Women today. She feels that both sexes are flawed, and that we balance each other out. Men are, by design, flaw, whatever, prone to cheat, drink, and be stupid. They need a "mother" at home to keep us straight. However, Women can't parent children as well on their own, and sometimes it just takes a man to straighten out children, and bring in the bacon, so to speak.

I don't necessarily agree with her. If you've been in a relationship, you know that everyone has issues. For me, marriage is overrated. I've seen very few that were worth saving, and most of the ones that are, are because the couple locks themselves away from society as a whole, and they live in their own little world.

I believe its become a time when the state shouldn't sponsor marriage anymore. It should be like any other business partnership, and thats the end of it. No religious overtones, none of that. If you want a religious ceremony, go to a church. However, the church shouldn't be able to legally marry you. This would end the gay marriage argument.

Its either doing things this way, or force people to stay with people that they don't want to be with. Life proves that people change, emotionally, physically, and mentally. The person you are with 10 years down the road will usually bare little resemblance to the one you were with 10 years earlier.
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Old 08-21-2009, 02:07 PM
 
Location: UK
296 posts, read 716,271 times
Reputation: 316
Considering what a miserable git you sound like Mr Jungeon, it is just as well that you are not married.
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Old 08-21-2009, 02:11 PM
 
Location: The Milky Way Galaxy
2,256 posts, read 5,902,937 times
Reputation: 1505
Lol...OP is getting owned in his thread
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Old 08-21-2009, 02:33 PM
 
Location: 125 Years Too Late...
10,336 posts, read 9,975,609 times
Reputation: 9086
Quote:
Originally Posted by jungeon View Post
LOL, marriage must be terrible i'd imagine, its like being married to an annoying family member who is always asking you to do stuff for them until you become whiped and have no spine left, and then they accuse you of changing or having no passion left and go and cheat on you. Dam I feel sorry for married people. No wonder they always complain about how their lives suck
Fortunately you are still afforded the right in this country to forego marriage... at least for the time being.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Memphis1979 View Post
I've seen marriages that have lasted, and those that haven't.

My mother and father were divorced just before their first anniversary. She was 16, and he was 19. They were forced to marry because she was pregnant.

My Grandmother and Grandfather have been married since 1952. Now, I don't believe their marriage is good. My grandfather is a drunk, and he was abusive, and he fooled around, and he did what he wanted. She kept everything running, and my Grandmother is one hell of a woman indeed for putting up with the things she did for so long.

She views things differently than most Women today. She feels that both sexes are flawed, and that we balance each other out. Men are, by design, flaw, whatever, prone to cheat, drink, and be stupid. They need a "mother" at home to keep us straight. However, Women can't parent children as well on their own, and sometimes it just takes a man to straighten out children, and bring in the bacon, so to speak.

I don't necessarily agree with her. If you've been in a relationship, you know that everyone has issues. For me, marriage is overrated. I've seen very few that were worth saving, and most of the ones that are, are because the couple locks themselves away from society as a whole, and they live in their own little world.

I believe its become a time when the state shouldn't sponsor marriage anymore. It should be like any other business partnership, and thats the end of it. No religious overtones, none of that. If you want a religious ceremony, go to a church. However, the church shouldn't be able to legally marry you. This would end the gay marriage argument.

Its either doing things this way, or force people to stay with people that they don't want to be with. Life proves that people change, emotionally, physically, and mentally. The person you are with 10 years down the road will usually bare little resemblance to the one you were with 10 years earlier.
Interesting perspective. I've thought about the sorts of ideas you touch on here. How about the polar opposite: there is no such thing as marriage as far as the state is concerned? There are no incentives or disincentives offered for 'marriage,' which in this scenario would exist only as a religious gesture--nothing more. Legally, you are always on your own. This also would end any controversy about gay marriage or any other kind of marriage; it wouldn't exist as far as the state is concerned. You live with someone, that's fine. If it's entered into as a 'marriage' religiously, that's fine, but it really means nothing as far as the state is concerned. The state completely stays out of any cohabitation arrangement and offers nothing monetarily either way.

NOTE: no flames please. Don't worry, it isn't going to happen and it's just a 'what if.'
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Old 08-23-2009, 06:06 AM
 
4,529 posts, read 4,738,758 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jungeon View Post
LOL, marriage must be terrible i'd imagine, its like being married to an annoying family member who is always asking you to do stuff for them until you become whiped and have no spine left, and then they accuse you of changing or having no passion left and go and cheat on you. Dam I feel sorry for married people. No wonder they always complain about how their lives suck
My parents celebrated their 50th this year, my grandparents made it into the 70's, and I'm married for just over twenty.

It's all about finding the right partner, and working through the trouble spots.

Advice, don't get married too young or too quickly.
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Old 08-23-2009, 06:26 AM
 
8,649 posts, read 14,870,155 times
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My wife and I have been married 38 years and we are doing just great... Or so she tells me....LOL

I wouldn't know what to do without Her.. So she tells me...LOL
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Old 08-23-2009, 07:16 AM
 
Location: :~)
1,483 posts, read 2,823,516 times
Reputation: 1519
Default Marriage

Since I am married I see and understand both views.

Monday, she is the best thing since sliced bread then on Wednesday I say forget this I am out of here. That's marriage! Marriage is full of challenges. When we agree to become mates or teammates we agree to fight all challengers togethor, like a baseball team. My wife and I fight like cats and dogs but when we are challenged by outside sources we stand behind one another. To me, marriage means fighting togethor against the day's events, working through problems and agreeing to the best answer, because no one knows all the answers, not even a counselor or a book.

My wife and I certainly have had our bad times and after 20 years I would still marry her. 20 years ago she was "stop traffic" beautiful, but today she's lost a little of that steam, 3 kids and life will do that. But to me, she is way better looking than before;(I still love watching her sleep). There's something about fighting togethor and picking each other up and brushing the dust off to fight the next challenge. Winning and losing togethor bonds you for life.

So, when your about to get married. Ask yourself the following: Will I love her when she is fat, pimply, rude and overbearing; you know, during the ugly times. During courtship, we only see the good so the morning bad breath and the bad attitude are not seen. Will I love him or her when they spent $200 for picture frame??? That's the challenge during the bad times.

Marriage is not peaches and cream. I've seen a seemingly perfect marriage crumble on the first major event. I said to myself, we've been through that 5 times. Being a yes man or yes women will not cut the mustard, you will end up like the above couple.

Quite honestly, I did not ask myself those questions but luckily we are being the odds. There is not a perfect answer, marriage sucks and is great all at once. Good luck!
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Old 08-23-2009, 08:43 AM
 
1,310 posts, read 2,640,118 times
Reputation: 581
Quote:
Originally Posted by AxisMundi View Post
My parents celebrated their 50th this year, my grandparents made it into the 70's, and I'm married for just over twenty.

It's all about finding the right partner, and working through the trouble spots.

Advice, don't get married too young or too quickly.

And....go for a formal course in Pre Marital BEFORE you get engaged so you dont feel any pressure to proceed if you shouldnt.
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