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This belongs in the relationship forum. All the tragic mother in law stories end up there.
This story is actually so far out its preety funny. The mother in law is trying to get you out of the house so she can do whatever it is she does when she's there by herself. Maybe she fantasizes she is the queen of the mansion when you're gone, or something. Whatever it is, she wants you out of the house. Be it that you are working or hanging out at a soup kitchen volunteering all day, I think she is just happy you are gone. She is the type of person that you give her a little and then she asks for a little bit more, and you never notice just how much she is taking until she has taken it all. I think its time you set the rules out for her, and get your bedroom back and lock your door, because this woman doesn't sound trustworthy. Beleive me, this woman is probably going through your wallet and taking out change once in a while. She probably uses your perfume and other stuff she sees lieing around or in your closet. Things you probably dont even notice. She's so broke that she wants you to leave the house so she can rummage through your stuff and see what else new you have that she hasn't used yet. She probably envies your huge bed and goes and sleeps in it while you and your husband are at work. Lol. This is the kind of person your MIL sounds like.
Kick her out. And don't give her the key to the new apartment.
Friend of mine had a MIL who didn't live with them but tried to rule everything. Always managed to show up at supper time! He got fed up with this, so, the next time she came to eat he told her he had something for her. Went in the next room and came out with a plate of Alpo! They didn't hear from her for a while!
Also, I assume that you're pulling that "90%" number out of the air.
Even so, my wife is absolutely nothing but good to our daughter-in-law. It's not that hard, really.
no its not hard to be nice to your daughterr in law, problem is some MOTHERS in law are just terrible people. and are that way regardless of how the son/daughter in law acts
no its not hard to be nice to your daughterr in law, problem is some MOTHERS in law are just terrible people. and are that way regardless of how the son/daughter in law acts
some people, you just can't please
You've pleased me greatly with your correct spelling.
Oh yeah, and I purposely, yeah, that's it, that's the ticket, PURPOSELY put my quotations marks INSIDE the period in my sentence on one of my posts to see if anyone would catch it and someone did.
This belongs in the relationship forum. All the tragic mother in law stories end up there.
This story is actually so far out its preety funny. The mother in law is trying to get you out of the house so she can do whatever it is she does when she's there by herself. Maybe she fantasizes she is the queen of the mansion when you're gone, or something. Whatever it is, she wants you out of the house. Be it that you are working or hanging out at a soup kitchen volunteering all day, I think she is just happy you are gone. She is the type of person that you give her a little and then she asks for a little bit more, and you never notice just how much she is taking until she has taken it all. I think its time you set the rules out for her, and get your bedroom back and lock your door, because this woman doesn't sound trustworthy. Beleive me, this woman is probably going through your wallet and taking out change once in a while. She probably uses your perfume and other stuff she sees lieing around or in your closet. Things you probably dont even notice. She's so broke that she wants you to leave the house so she can rummage through your stuff and see what else new you have that she hasn't used yet. She probably envies your huge bed and goes and sleeps in it while you and your husband are at work. Lol. This is the kind of person your MIL sounds like.
Kick her out. And don't give her the key to the new apartment.
*sigh* actually, she does use my perfume, wear my clothes to work and gets them very dirty where the stains don't come out, smokes my cigarettes, and I have gone in circles using every piece of advice I can think of. I guess I just really stink at making my point across.
If I listed everything I've tried to do to fix this situation aside from walking out the door with my bags packed, I would run out of word count space.
For two years I've decided my love the DH is worth all of this misery...I was just thinking maybe I missed the bigger picture here...sometimes you're so knee deep in crap you can't smell anything else.
Friend of mine had a MIL who didn't live with them but tried to rule everything. Always managed to show up at supper time! He got fed up with this, so, the next time she came to eat he told her he had something for her. Went in the next room and came out with a plate of Alpo! They didn't hear from her for a while!
The situation is mostly your fault. You allowed your mother in law to walk all over you, and you also voluntarily quit your job. Pull up your big-girl panties, give her the boot, go get yourself a job for god's sake, and take responsibility. You have nobody to blame here but yourself.
O.k., I can take it raw, I appreciate your honest open opinion here.
I did allow my MIL to rule this roost. No doubts about that. She claimed Alpha from day one and I did not have a plan of attack. Not naturally a born leader, so I do have to work at taking what is mine. I agree here.
I did quit my job. I didn't have to, but I did. I went into work for 13 months and came out sick as a dog. I was going to be fired from serious mood swings and mouthing off to a customer during one of my fun days of nervous breakdowns, but totally preventable if I had managed to see a doctor and paid my fees, and got this problem corrected. It took me 4 months to get it all under control with medications and biopsies, but hey, we learn the hard way sometimes. I'll be smarter the next time around
All my fault, thanks! I guess your solution here is.....what again? you made your bed now lie in it sort of thing? Ah I getcha.
Honestly, I think your mother-in-law is only part of your problem. And I do think you have several issues that must be worked through.
First and foremost, your husband needs to decide whether he is going to be a husband FIRST or a boy FIRST. In this case, if he must remain a boy FIRST, your marriage is not going to survive.
When a husband allows his mother to crap all over his wife, he is choosing to be a boy instead of a man. And no woman wants to be married to a boy.
I thought about your post a few nights ago when DH decided to reactive his world of warcraft account we canceled a few years ago. I wonder if living with said MIL puts him back in "little boy mode" where responsibility is null and void. She washes his laundry and cooks his meals for him. Basically I am not needed in this house anymore it seems.
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