Loss of a spouse and your wedding rings

[tngirl205]

Originally Posted by tonmar4749

My husband passed 4 months ago we started dating when I was 14 he was 17 and were married 44 years. He was a soldier for 24 years then goverment work so I was used to him being away a lot I have not moved any of his clothes far less giving them away, his book is still on the bed side table his glasses are on the coffee table I know I've not accepted that he is never coming home but I honestly can't see me ever taking my ring off, I've never taken it off since I was 18 and I'm now 63. I love him too much to take my rings off and yes I know I said love him instead of loved but if you have loved someone for 48 years you can't just stop loving them because they are not sitting across from you and our rings are a symbol of that love.I personaly can not see me ever takeing my wedding ring off but that is how I feel it is up to the individual.

Dear tonmar, please accept my sincere condolences on the loss of your husband. My husband and I had been married 32 years when he passed away 4-1-12; I can't believe it is coming up on a year already.

So much in my life has changed since his death, but one thing that has never changed has been my love for him. I miss him terribly. I too continue to wear my ring as a symbol of my love. We had matching gold bands, wide with a filigree design. I have had many compliments on the ring over the years.

tngirl

[smilinpretty]

Dear Tonmar, I am so sorry for your deep loss of your husband and I send to you my sincere sympathy.
I don't believe there is any set rules on when or if to take off your rings. I think it is up to the individual. I am in love with my husband and as long as I feel married to him, the rings will be on my finger.
All of my best to you.

[gentlearts]

I have not lived through this particular sorrow yet, but I feel that I would not take my rings off until such time, after years not months, that I might want to look for another relationship. Maybe I would never want to. Hard to say.

[Marcy1210]

Tonmar, my husband passed away three years ago. I still wear my rings because even though he's gone, my love for him isn't. I may not be legally married to him anymore, or married in the eyes of the church, but in my heart, I will always be married to him until my death I do part this world to be reunited with him in eternity. I was 57 when he died, he was 59. We'd been married for 36 years, and I have no intention of ever marrying again. I can guarantee I won't date romantically again and I'm not interested in ever having another romantic relationship, so I will die still wearing my rings.

I still have his bathrobe hanging on the hook in the bathroom and his slippers in the closet. I kept many of his t-shirts and sweatshirts and I wear them all the time. I have his wallet in an oak box, along with his Rx sunglasses, his watch and reading glasses. His keys are on the hook they were always on in Colorado~~it's just hanging here in Tucson, now. There are touches of him all around the house, and as long as I can, they will stay here with me. Do what makes you feel good. Don't listen to anyone but what's in your heart, and follow its lead. Be true to yourself and do what feels right for you.

[Rubi3]

My mother stopped wearing her rings about 30 years into her marriage, because it bothered her for them to be on her finger, so, eventually, she gave them to me, long before she was widowed. I doubt dad even noticed. They were married 73 years. I know several widows and some still wear their rings and some don't.

[lmw36]

My father stopped wearing his band after my stepmothers funeral. Their bands now sit side by side on her urn which is kept on my fathers bedside table. She left me her engagement ring and I wear it every day.

Without saying, I feel my father felt his ring "belonged" next to hers. I never asked, but perhaps she told him to remove it after her funeral. She was terminally ill and made lots of plans as to what she wanted to happen to the home/her belongings after her death. I feel this may have been one of them.

[CouponGal]

I have never married, but I know that if I found myself widowed, I would continue to wear my ring. It is a great way to honor your loved one, especially if you don't intend on marrying again. If I found someone I loved enough to marry, then there is no one else I'd want.

I guess this was instilled in me from my wonderful grandmother. She was suddenly widowed at 64, and passed away wearing her wedding ring- it never even came off during the 30 years, 2 months, and 1 day that she was a widow. What a great woman! <3

[Bette]

Originally Posted by CouponGal

I have never married, but I know that if I found myself widowed, I would continue to wear my ring. It is a great way to honor your loved one, especially if you don't intend on marrying again. If I found someone I loved enough to marry, then there is no one else I'd want.

I guess this was instilled in me from my wonderful grandmother. She was suddenly widowed at 64, and passed away wearing her wedding ring- it never even came off during the 30 years, 2 months, and 1 day that she was a widow. What a great woman! <3

I love this and I would do this also but I hope I will never have to be a widow.

[Marcy1210]

Originally Posted by CouponGal

I have never married, but I know that if I found myself widowed, I would continue to wear my ring. It is a great way to honor your loved one, especially if you don't intend on marrying again. If I found someone I loved enough to marry, then there is no one else I'd want.

I guess this was instilled in me from my wonderful grandmother. She was suddenly widowed at 64, and passed away wearing her wedding ring- it never even came off during the 30 years, 2 months, and 1 day that she was a widow. What a great woman! <3

I am a widow (1337 days) and I am still wearing my wedding rings with love and pride as a way to honor my marriage and the vows I took. I may not be legally married anymore, but I am still married in my heart and soul. I will always be deeply in love with my husband, and will go to my grave emotionally and spiritually as one with him just as I was 40 years ago when we first exchanged vows.

[tamiznluv]

Wow, Marcy, you still count the days??? I noticed when I talked to my daughter two days ago she said it was 837 days and I thought to myself, "I don't count days anymore. I count in year or months." Just wow!