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Old 06-24-2012, 06:41 PM
 
Location: In bed with Madonna
475 posts, read 379,895 times
Reputation: 408

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I lost my mom on June 12 of this year (couple of weeks ago) and i dont know how to continue with my life.
We are from Argentina (im the only one living here in the US). My mom used to come every year to see for a whole month. She did it 7 years in a row. I think about that i gave everything to her, how much i love her, that i made her happy and proud but i still cant get rid off this horrible feeling i have in my heart and in my soul.
I couldnt go to her funeral because everything was so fast. She wasnt sick or anything. The night she die she started to have pain on her chest and after few minutes she was gone.
Im reading a book about "How to cope with your mother's dead" and i think its kinda helping me but still. Some day i feel like i want to kill myself and just go with her. Im so sad.
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Old 06-24-2012, 06:53 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
16,481 posts, read 15,923,785 times
Reputation: 38756
I am so sorry about your mother's death. I know that it must be very difficult for you. My mother died 20 years ago and it is still hard at times.

Please find a good friend or support group in your area so that you will have someone to talk to.

Hang in there. God Bless You.
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Old 06-24-2012, 06:55 PM
 
4,111 posts, read 12,832,144 times
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I'm very sorry for the unexpected loss of your mom. Would just focus on the good memories - that's what she would have wanted. Maybe going to Compassionate Friends would help - they have chapters in most cities, you can google their meetings with your zip code - they really can help. Again, Im very sorry.
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Old 06-24-2012, 06:56 PM
 
Location: The Great State of Arkansas
5,981 posts, read 15,900,945 times
Reputation: 7531
Marce, first of all - your loss is very recent, but it is the right time for you to call your local mental health provider and get some help regarding your feelings of extreme loss and hopelessness. Please find a qualified grief therapist immediately, or there are hotlines you can call at any hour.

I lost my mother as a teen. I assure you, you will never stop missing your mom - or loving her and wishing she were still here. But you will come through it and eventually the pain will be replaced with warm, wonderful, loving memories of her.

I know your mom loved you and was so proud of you and enjoyed every minute you could spend together. I'm so very sorry for your loss. I know it is painful, and those of us who were so very attached to our mothers need someone we can talk to about our feelings who can not only be sorry with us, but actually help us get back on our feet again. Please make that call as soon as possible - you don't have to go through your grief alone, and a counselor is a great comfort.

Peace to you.
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Old 06-24-2012, 07:26 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles area
14,022 posts, read 16,947,806 times
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To the OP (Marce 30): Your mom would not want you to take your own life in order to be with her. She gave birth to you and raised you so that you would have your own life. While you will always miss her, your grief will gradually subside with time. No one can say how much time, but the burden will become easier to bear. Therefore, your suicide would be a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
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Old 06-24-2012, 11:44 PM
 
Location: The heart of Cascadia
1,328 posts, read 2,539,536 times
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If it's only been two weeks, I'd say these feelings are very normal. Please don't hurt yourself though, my only suggestion would be to try to keep busy, maybe do some things that you love, and cry as much as you need to.
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Old 06-25-2012, 09:20 AM
 
Location: Prescott AZ
5,843 posts, read 8,429,491 times
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Hi Marce: Grief is a very normal part of life. The passing of a loved one, especially your mother, is a temporary situation that we all must go through. The good thing is that you will go through it. You won't stop in the middle of your grief and dwell there forever. I am sure your Mom would not want that for you. So take this time to be good to yourself. Give yourself time. Give your self some extra love and things you don't ordinarily do. Time is your friend. You will be okay.
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Old 06-25-2012, 05:59 PM
 
Location: West Michigan
12,220 posts, read 7,346,038 times
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So sorry for your loss. It hurts like hell in these early weeks of grief but know in time it does get better. When you're really down, try to focus on what your mom would want for you and I'll bet that would be for you to eventually move past the grieving stage and go on to live a happy, full life again.

You might want to seek out a local grief support group. If you attend church, they might be able to recommend one or even a near-by funeral home or a social worker at your local hospital would have resources if you can't find a listing for your area.
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Old 06-25-2012, 06:24 PM
 
13,496 posts, read 13,975,028 times
Reputation: 11119
you have just started to grieve please do not put pressure on yourself to fell like you can get back to a normal life so soon after the loss of your mom. sudden death is a hard one to come to terms with. it hits like you like a truck going full speed down the road. my mom also died suddenly and there was no funeral.

I always felt because there was no funeral that we never really said a proper goodbye to her. I would surly take the time to talk to your family and friends about your mom. I would also go somewhere special that you and your mom visited together and take the time to reflect and say what you want to her. not many people are lucky enough to feel like they said it all they need to. bring out her pictures, put them in a nice frame so you can see her often has helped me.

give yourself time, you will one day feel like life is worth living. your mom would want you happy, do things for yourself with her in mind when you feel up to it. sending you a huge hug
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Old 06-25-2012, 06:54 PM
 
Location: Boca Raton, FL
4,851 posts, read 8,321,656 times
Reputation: 5483
Smile Losing your mom - so sorry

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marce30 View Post
I lost my mom on June 12 of this year (couple of weeks ago) and i dont know how to continue with my life.
We are from Argentina (im the only one living here in the US). My mom used to come every year to see for a whole month. She did it 7 years in a row. I think about that i gave everything to her, how much i love her, that i made her happy and proud but i still cant get rid off this horrible feeling i have in my heart and in my soul.
I couldnt go to her funeral because everything was so fast. She wasnt sick or anything. The night she die she started to have pain on her chest and after few minutes she was gone.
Im reading a book about "How to cope with your mother's dead" and i think its kinda helping me but still. Some day i feel like i want to kill myself and just go with her. Im so sad.
Think about her, talk to her. We had a service about 3-4 weeks after our mother passed away and it is just remembering the good times. So, go somewhere quiet and talk to her. She will know. I feel my mom often and it's funny b/c I was closer to my dad. Please hold on to the fact that you did make your mom happy - I'm a mom and that's all we want!!

Think of all those that really suffer for years and your mom went easily. She was needed somewhere else (Heaven? if you believe - I do).
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