I myself understand exaclty how a loss can affect your life.
I found out I was pregnant 2/9/2011; I was thrilled because I never thought I would be able to have kids. I had irregular menstral cycles and me & my bf @ that time tried for 7months.
with no success. Everytime I went to get an ultrasound, it just reminded me that something was living inside of me and I now had someone else to live for and love me, despite my faults and previous messups in life. I was gonna be a MOMMY!!!
But then the fretful day, April 27th 2011 came, my waterbroke the night before, unknown to me and in the morning when i went to the bathroom, i saw blood. We immediately got dressed and headed for the hospital. Thats when the doctor's told me that the baby had passed
and if that wasnt enough, they told me I was too far long and that I would have to go thru labor and give birth to the baby. For anyone who has never went thru something like this, it is thee most scary, usual, uncomfortable experience.
To make a long story short, I gave birth to the stillborn baby we named Jace Karryl, we even had him baptized. It was the one thing that we wanted to do offically as "parents". We also found out that the reason why the baby passed was because he was very active and the cord was wrapped around his neck twice. They couldnt see that on the ultrasound.
All in all, when April 27th comes around, I dedicate it to my guardian angel, Jace Karryl. I go to the movies, pull out ultrasound pictures, go to dinner. For me, that day is a celebration of my son, and I try to make it the happiest day of my life during the year.