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Old 12-21-2012, 10:06 AM
 
Location: SWFL
21,433 posts, read 18,150,188 times
Reputation: 18814

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Quote:
Originally Posted by DanBev View Post
I have repeated this over and over,nothing will change as long as there is no way to deal with the mentally ill.It is an almost impossible situation to deal with legally.It takes lawyers,two doctors and judge and possibly a baker hold to get started etc.
What's a "baker hold", Dan? I've never heard that expression before.

Yes, dealing with the mental issues in this country need to be addressed asap as well as banning the assault/semi-assault weapons.
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Old 12-21-2012, 01:37 PM
 
Location: The Great State of Arkansas
5,981 posts, read 15,900,945 times
Reputation: 7531
Folks, there are a ton of other threads running on C-D about this; this is a Grief forum. While we all feel grief over what happened in Sandy Hook, let's please get the topic back on track. Grieving is what we do here. Mental health issues, gun control, etc. are best left to another area.....I identify with what everyone is saying and this is grief on a national level, but this is also a safe place for those who are having a hard time with whatever tragedy is in their lives or in the world. Let's keep it safe, okay? Thank you.
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Old 12-21-2012, 02:12 PM
 
2,382 posts, read 6,077,446 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tamiznluv View Post
What's a "baker hold", Dan? I've never heard that expression before.

Yes, dealing with the mental issues in this country need to be addressed asap as well as banning the assault/semi-assault weapons.
The Baker Hold is and I am glad to have you ask because this is the only way the police can hold a party who might be deemed mentally dangerous.it is for only 72 hours so a judge can evaluate subject.The name Baker is the name of person who got this law.
I have posted elsewhere on this subject.You cannot commit or arrest a party on hersay.
I believe they used this on the Gabby Gifford killer at some point.
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Old 12-21-2012, 02:30 PM
 
Location: SWFL
21,433 posts, read 18,150,188 times
Reputation: 18814
Quote:
Originally Posted by DanBev View Post
The Baker Hold is and I am glad to have you ask because this is the only way the police can hold a party who might be deemed mentally dangerous.it is for only 72 hours so a judge can evaluate subject.The name Baker is the name of person who got this law.
I have posted elsewhere on this subject.You cannot commit or arrest a party on hersay.
I believe they used this on the Gabby Gifford killer at some point.
Oh, I see! I always hear the "cops" on SVU or whatever say they can only hold a person for 72 hours initially. Thanks! Now I know why.

*Sigh*, time to go turn the tv on and get my daily dose of sadness. I think the funerals should be pretty well over by Monday or Tuesday. Can you imagine the back to back funerals day after day?

I heard the father of little Jesse give his condolences to Adam's family last night. I think he is the only one I have heard say that. That they were "victims" too. The dad was in rough shape last night but was kind in his interview anyways.

Vicki Soto's baby brother could almost not get a word in edgewise with his mother and two sisters on Anderson Cooper's 360 last night. The sisters got her jewelry so he took the badge Vicki was wearing in school last Friday and wears it. Chilling.
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Old 12-22-2012, 08:03 AM
 
Location: SWFL
21,433 posts, read 18,150,188 times
Reputation: 18814
When I did turn the tv on I watched 360 and Anderson reported that when the kids start back to school at Chalk Hill in Monroe, Ct., the first grade classes will be combined...............because only ONE little soul survived the masacre of one first grade class. OMG. Those words hit me like a Mack truck. I gasped and I just burst out crying. OMG.

I'm going to go over to the political side so I can rave and rant about the NRA and the JERK who was on Piers Morgan last night.

Nope, went there and read a little of just one thread and my tummy just started boiling. Guess I really do need to stay away from there!

Last edited by tamiznluv; 12-22-2012 at 08:23 AM..
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Old 12-22-2012, 08:30 PM
 
549 posts, read 819,590 times
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This whole tragedy has restarted my grief again. I can't understand how 20 little innocent lives had to be taken. It makes no sense.

I also understand how mental illness needs to be addressed in this country. I have a 22 year old son who is mentally ill. When he was a teenager we slept with our 4 yearl old in our room with the door baricaded. My husband is a huge gun enthusiast and even he removed all of the guns from our house. We already had them locked in a safe and all had trigger locks. We felt VERY unsafe. I tried for years to get him help. Doctor after doctor meds after meds. There were 4 things that happened that helped me get him help. 1. He accused his dad of stabbing him and the police visited him at work. Ended up they gave our son a ticket for false reporting. 2. He worked at a fast food place and threatened to kill everyone. They called me and asked me what they should do. I told them to call the police. DUH!!! 3. He ran away from home and when the police brought him home I told them to take him somewhere else. They refused and told me to deal with it. That wasn't the first time the police were at our house but it was the last. 4. He threatened to harm his entire math class. That finally did the trick and I was able to get him the help he needed. He was a teen then and I had just a little bit of control. Now he is an adult and lives on his own 500 miles away from us. He has his own family. I pray everyday they are all safe. I don't know how he acts now. I know I wasn't impressed at my sister's funeral. He wasn't horrible but not quite right either. He refuses to take his medications and there is not a darn thing anyone can do about it unless he commits a crime. Thank God he has no access to guns.

Thanks for reading that. It has been on my mind alot. I feel just as sorry for the family of the person who commits these terrible acts. We don't know what happened in their lives, we don't know how hard they fought to make things "normal". We can never imagine how much guilt they feel over their son/brother doing such a horrible thing to change so many peoples lives.
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Old 12-23-2012, 09:39 AM
 
Location: New York State, USA
142 posts, read 202,902 times
Reputation: 173
The day after the shootings, I went to a Christmas/housewarming party for a friend. I was numb. Three ladies held the door for me as I entered. The hostess said privately that one of those three women was a close friend of the shooter's family. I know nothing else. But I'm glad I smiled at all three and said some cheery greeting. At least comforting somewhat.

For me, I've been numb. Taking it all in, sorting it all out. It didn't hit me until last Sunday night, when I watched Anderson Cooper, and then I couldn't stop sobbing. All those children. And the teachers who tried to save them. And the little girl who was the sole survivor because she played dead. That was the breaking point for me. She was covered in her friends' blood. Then, I read online the comments of a Marine who said he knew men who couldn't do what she did to survive. I cried so hard that I made myself sick. Vommited. Choking.

I went through two days trying to do normal activities. I was invited to two Christmas parties, but couldn't go. Then, my body shut down. Got a cold or the flu, not sure which. Good thing I had medicine at home and food. So, coughing, and sick, I watched the news and read online.

I can't imagine how these survivors are going to make it through. Crisis workers and trauma experts will have to be there for them. And the children who survived, that one little girl, she will have PTSD for rest of her life. I can see how many parts of life will be terrifying for her, and for her parents, and for all those who survived. Flashbacks, sounds, visuals, this nightmare is just beginning for them.

From the standpoint of being unable to cry due to having this cold or flu, I took a break from the standard cable news. For a while last night, I watched PBS. Very good calmer coverage and reflection. Something has to change in this country. We have a lot to work on, all of it. It's not just one thing, it's our whole culture that contributed to this slaughter. And, before I read someone's post on here that Adam Lanza went off because he didn't want to be commited, I thought about a similar senario as a possibility. He should have been evaluated by a school psychologist long ago, with an Individual Education Plan, working with special education teachers and his parents. And if his mother was that afraid, why didn't she call the police? And what about the body armor? How did he get that? This family had money. It's not as if they couldn't afford help and not a case of insurance not covering mental health or neurological tests. And allowing any child, teen, to play these violent video games. And then keeping guns --- not locked ???? --- in the house? Perhaps Nancy Lanza was in some kind of denial herself?

I wish I could cry. Being sick has left me numb.
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Old 12-24-2012, 02:56 AM
 
Location: The Great State of Arkansas
5,981 posts, read 15,900,945 times
Reputation: 7531
Folks, again - please - hold this to any grief reactions you may have had or are currently having. This is not the forum for the discussion on mental health issues and/or treatment, general violence, etc. I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound abrupt or cold, but we sort of have to keep things in the appropriate forums. Thanks for your participation and help.
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Old 12-24-2012, 05:45 AM
 
Location: SWFL
21,433 posts, read 18,150,188 times
Reputation: 18814
I heard another something yesterday about the one little girl who survived the masacre at Shady Brook, she played dead. How amazing is that that a 6 or 7 year old knew enough to play possum?? I heard that and started to cry again.

TG the funerals are all over. May they all RIP.
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Old 12-24-2012, 06:42 AM
 
27,993 posts, read 19,652,644 times
Reputation: 16471
lenora and tami, thank you. I appreciate your kind words.
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