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Old 07-08-2013, 05:28 AM
 
8,440 posts, read 10,730,757 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bluff_Dweller View Post
Yes, you and Jude could have a barbeque, possibly without a fire even. LOL

Just because we don't post much CA, doesn't mean we are uncaring, I moniter your progress as many other are.

Here in Missouri the temp is in the mid 80's and my AC quit last night. I will wait for Monday to call and get on the repair list as I don't wish to pay holiday prices. Next week is predicted in the mid 90's so I am anxious to get it repaired. Always something.

My daughter called a friend of hers and cleaned my wifes clothes from the main closet. After my daughter returned to her home in the BVI I found two more closeta with her more dress up clothes. It has only been 5 1/2 years so there shouldn't be any rush on my part to get some boxes and box them up, is there?

Usual (((HUGS))) to you and the other posters!
Bluff
No hurry, Bluff. If they are your closets you will know. Sometimes when we have items such as clothing we sometimes find unexpected treasurese in pockets etc. For many, those items have great significance.

Don't stress about the clothes. There is one or more reason it hasn't been the right time yet.

Good luck with the AC situation. We've just had two weeks of 13-18 degrees above normal temps.

MSR
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Old 07-08-2013, 05:37 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jude1948 View Post
More rain coming today through Wednesday. I was going to use the grill last night for salmon, but the downpour kept it from happening. Watched and old Jack Lemon move last night "How to Murder Your Wife". He was quite a character. I need to get out to do something today.

Yesterday I went shopping and on the way out, I saw an older beagle at the end of the street just standing there. When I returned about two hours later, she was still there, and I know it had poured during that time. Had nice clothes on but I hoisted up 20 pounds of her (big girl) and got her home with me. No tags, so I drove around a couple of neighborhoods but no one was looking for her. I hated to call the humane society, but it had to be done. She kept me company for about an hour. I hope her owners track her down. What made me the saddest is the fact that she was out there roaming for a couple of hours, and no other person stopped to get her. That street is well traveled and she was lucky she was not hit. I guess we had something in common...old gal ignored by passersby....LOL.
Maybe she was sent to check on you, if you believe in those kinds of " events" happening.

MSR
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Old 07-08-2013, 10:13 PM
 
Location: Southwest Desert
4,166 posts, read 5,182,546 times
Reputation: 3514
Mtn. States...Thanks for sharing...I hope you can go back to the place that made you the happiest. (Soon!)...I'm glad you have good friends who have become your family...My cousin and I have the same first name with one letter variation...She grew-up in the country and I grew-up in cities but we have so much in common...Our Dads were a lot alike and taught us the same things. (To have common sense!)...They also taught us to "balance" work with time out for fun and play too!.. Even though we grew-up miles and miles apart we feel like sisters!
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Old 07-09-2013, 03:08 AM
 
Location: Table Rock Lake
971 posts, read 1,135,782 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mtn. States Resident View Post
No hurry, Bluff. If they are your closets you will know. Sometimes when we have items such as clothing we sometimes find unexpected treasurese in pockets etc. For many, those items have great significance.

Don't stress about the clothes. There is one or more reason it hasn't been the right time yet.

Good luck with the AC situation. We've just had two weeks of 13-18 degrees above normal temps.

MSR
Good point MSR, I will be sure and check the pockets. When my daughter emptied the main closet, it was my wifes casual clothes and they were taken to a town 50 miles away. I live in a rural area and wouldn't want to see my wifes clothes on someone else. So I will eventially take them to the city to donate.

We had a week of good weather (in the 70's) now it is in the 90's. Isn't that when the AC always goes out? LOL Repairman is to be here tomorrow at 1 p.m. Thanks for the good wishes.

Stay cool.
Bluff

Last edited by Bluff_Dweller; 07-09-2013 at 03:09 AM.. Reason: Typo
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Old 07-09-2013, 06:03 AM
 
Location: Southwest Desert
4,166 posts, read 5,182,546 times
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Bluff...Glad you're having cooler weather. It would be weird to see local women wearing your wife's clothes...What is the population of your town?.. Are you having your A/C repaired or replaced? Good luck.
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Old 07-09-2013, 04:41 PM
 
8,440 posts, read 10,730,757 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CArizona View Post
Mtn. States...Thanks for sharing...I hope you can go back to the place that made you the happiest. (Soon!)...I'm glad you have good friends who have become your family...My cousin and I have the same first name with one letter variation...She grew-up in the country and I grew-up in cities but we have so much in common...Our Dads were a lot alike and taught us the same things. (To have common sense!)...They also taught us to "balance" work with time out for fun and play too!.. Even though we grew-up miles and miles apart we feel like sisters!
Thanks CA for your post. Kinda of cool about your cousin's first name and yours being so close. If you had lived in the same area as kids, do you think you would have been best buddies at younger ages?

Yes, I've been blessed with having such good friends that one I worked with for years, and I bought a house together. There was nothing romantic in the relationship, just two people born thousands of miles apart who met due to work, or higher powers, if one believes in higher powers, which I do.

Try explaining to families beyond the economical sense of not having two kitchens, laundry areas and being able to buy a house in a better neighborhood, why two non-romantically connected adults would buy a house together and make decisions " because they felt right."

In today's economy that decision may not be a big deal, but we broke a mold for many. Our respective families didn't know how to treat us. I guess some really were incapable ( or hurt) that we had met and worked together enough to have trusted each other enough we'd each pay our part of the mortgage and expenses for a home/yard. We decided to buy a house together as we each needed to move for entirely different reasons. But clearly we felt connected in a way neither of us had with exes, current love interests etc.

That is the friend I recently lost. Now it's trying to fit in with my family who honestly are trying, but they don't have a fraction of understanding of what I'm dealing with. My family has been great compared to my friend's family. I'll simply say it has been earth shattering to me that the surviving family told me the day my friend died, all additional arrangements were "private, and family only."

Fortunately, I do have other good, close friends but not living where I am presently. And while I'd be happy to move in for a while if one were sick, to do what I could for that friend, I don't think I would ever buy a house with another friend, but one can never say for sure. I just know what it took for two true friends, not romantically involved, to put the effort into a co-purchased home with a lot of jealousy and more from my friend's family. That isn't just my opinion either and unfortunately my friend knew the limits of that family.

Absolutely, I agree when relatives or friends grow to view the world in a similar manner, it makes the opportunity of talking with or seeing that person exciting and comfortable. The conversation never ends when the right two people are speaking

I'm happy your cousin is in your life, CA

MSR
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Old 07-09-2013, 08:54 PM
 
Location: Southwest Desert
4,166 posts, read 5,182,546 times
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Mtn. States...I'm so sorry you lost your close, close friend. Sorry for the way her family treated you...Great that you and your friend had the guts and courage to be true to yourselves...I need to get past my "day-by-day" and heavy-duty grief before I think about moving near my cousin and other relatives. And sometimes I feel a little nervous about stepping into other peoples' ongoing lives.. But I sure feel close to my cousin...I spent 2 glorious weeks with her (and her husband) a few years back and I seemed to "click" with everyone. I wanted to stay there forever but I missed my husband and son. I was anxious to come home to see them!
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Old 07-09-2013, 10:19 PM
 
8,440 posts, read 10,730,757 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CArizona View Post
Mtn. States...I'm so sorry you lost your close, close friend. Sorry for the way her family treated you...Great that you and your friend had the guts and courage to be true to yourselves...I need to get past my "day-by-day" and heavy-duty grief before I think about moving near my cousin and other relatives. And sometimes I feel a little nervous about stepping into other peoples' ongoing lives.. But I sure feel close to my cousin...I spent 2 glorious weeks with her (and her husband) a few years back and I seemed to "click" with everyone. I wanted to stay there forever but I missed my husband and son. I was anxious to come home to see them!
Thank you, CA, for your caring post. I've survived deaths in my family and they were hard, but nothing like this. Knowing how my friend was treated or not appropriately treated by the family was hard enough life. Knowing how this family has attempted to devalue my close, close, close friend has almost been more than I can handle. No public announcement and I'm guessing no service of any type where the family is gnaws at my basic sense of humanity in a way I've never encountered before. People need to grieve and part of public notification of a person's death is so grieving and good-byes can occur.

As you think about your "One Day At a Time," I'm not you and you are the only one who knows how your day today was compared to 6/9/13. Yes it's one day and making it through the day. However, to me, you seem able to address more things in a day. Does it feel that way for you?
Perhaps as we start to heal, the one day includes more subjects, more interaction with others and comforting as well as needing comfort.

You always make excellent common sense points. What would you think of a vacation to visit your cousin? It would allow the two of you to talk more, let you feel the area and see if you might want to pursue more frequent contact and/or you moving later? Worst case it would be a vacation for you to see someone who seems to think a lot like you. It would be something positive to plan.

Thanks again for your post. I sincerely appreciate your kind words

MSR
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Old 07-10-2013, 08:22 AM
 
Location: Southwest Desert
4,166 posts, read 5,182,546 times
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Mtn. States..Thanks for all your wrote...Well normally I do okay but I can get "overwhelmed" pretty fast. My "nerves" and my concentration skills probably aren't "up to par" quite yet...Even though my cousin lives in the country her life can be pretty "fast-paced." For starters she runs her own sewing business...Then she pitches-in and helps her big family with everything. (Farming, running a cattle auction, and you name it!)...Plus she attends all of her grandkids' games and events. (Even if it means driving across the state or to a neighboring state.)...She's a "dynamo" and she's in her 70's. (Older than me.)...I'd love to pitch-in and help "my family" too but I'm not quite up to it yet...One of the highlights of my trip was riding in a modern combine and harvesting corn with my cousin's SIL...Wow! We had a "heartfelt talk" during our ride together. And got along great!...On top of everything else my cousin delivers food to people in her town through "Meals on Wheels." She visits people in local nursing homes and bakes bread and rolls and "cans" apple butter for neighbors and friends and family members...She has "unlimited energy!" And always takes time to "be there" for the people she loves...Anyway I'd love to be part of everything but I'm still in a "recovery phase" right now.
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Old 07-10-2013, 08:34 AM
 
Location: Southwest Desert
4,166 posts, read 5,182,546 times
Reputation: 3514
Mtn. States...A little more: I'm so sorry you were "cut-out" of things when your friend died...Some families can be pretty "small-minded" and petty. It's sad!...I had a few people like this in my family. But all in all I was taught that love isn't suppose to be "hoarded." (To create "enough to go around" for everyone.)...This is how my cousin feels too. So we have this "in-common."
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