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Old 02-06-2016, 10:15 AM
 
632 posts, read 629,732 times
Reputation: 694

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Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnieA View Post
What an interesting and lovely idea.


I am sorry for your loss and I understand. May God keep you in his love.


My beautiful, profoundly retarded daughter died when she was 4 1/2 years old. She suffered terribly in her young life but we always felt blessed to have known her. That being said, it was a relief knowing that she would no longer be in pain, ill and suffering. She is with the angels.

Could you please explain what you mean by your profoundly retarded daughter? What is beautiful about such a daughter if she was suffering as much as you describe?
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Old 02-06-2016, 06:15 PM
 
Location: Cochise county, AZ
4,544 posts, read 3,010,212 times
Reputation: 9433
Quote:
Originally Posted by meo92953 View Post
I just wanted to report that one of my brothers wants to pay 1/2 of my expenses for the cremation. I told him it wasn't necessary but he insisted. His way of saying I love you to my son.

I love my family.
A beautiful card from my brother and, yes, a check. Got me crying again, although that is a constant anyway.

Have still not picked up the ashes as the weather has not cooperated. That are 200 miles away & either it's nice their & lousy here, or the exact opposite. Now we're being hit by more dangerous weather.

I just want him safely in my care again. I know he is ashes now, but he's still my baby boy.
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Old 02-06-2016, 06:30 PM
 
Location: Cochise county, AZ
4,544 posts, read 3,010,212 times
Reputation: 9433
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aleister Crowley View Post
Could you please explain what you mean by your profoundly retarded daughter? What is beautiful about such a daughter if she was suffering as much as you describe?
A child can be so beautiful inside that she changes lives around her. The heart grows bigger and love and compassion becomes so much more.
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Old 02-06-2016, 11:03 PM
 
Location: Cochise county, AZ
4,544 posts, read 3,010,212 times
Reputation: 9433
Darn it. Just having a real bad day/night. A lot of "I wish I'd....." & of course, it's too late. It's going to be a rough night, I can already tell.
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Old 02-15-2016, 07:49 PM
 
Location: Cochise county, AZ
4,544 posts, read 3,010,212 times
Reputation: 9433
Didn't want to keep this going but, my brother made me cry tonight. He said it wasn't my fault my son was as he was at the end.

I understand that. He had a mental illness. I know that. He threatened my family & we all had to stop communications, I know that too. But I grieve for the beautiful boy I knew & I have that right. But they act like I shouldn't cry. And I can't hold it inside just so they are not uncomfortable.
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Old 02-15-2016, 08:35 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles
3,410 posts, read 1,963,566 times
Reputation: 10037
I am so sad for your loss. Our children are our greatest gift and we will always cherish them as the innocent souls that they were. Life is unpredictable and it can be cruel. Your son was a victim of something that he had no control over and that includes his threatening behavior. Keep the "little boy" in your heart and take the time to mourn his passing. If it helps you at all, I would be absolutely inconsolable if I were you. God Bless.
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Old 02-15-2016, 08:37 PM
Status: "be kind." (set 25 days ago)
 
2,682 posts, read 3,885,118 times
Reputation: 6252
Quote:
Originally Posted by meo92953 View Post
Didn't want to keep this going but, my brother made me cry tonight. He said it wasn't my fault my son was as he was at the end.

I understand that. He had a mental illness. I know that. He threatened my family & we all had to stop communications, I know that too. But I grieve for the beautiful boy I knew & I have that right. But they act like I shouldn't cry. And I can't hold it inside just so they are not uncomfortable.
You absolutely have the right to grieve for your son. I think a parents loss of a child is the hardest loss of all. I hope you will eventually remember the good times with your son and that memories of the bad times will fade. Be kind to yourself, give yourself time to grieve (and cry) and take care of yourself. Sending hugs your way.
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Old 02-15-2016, 08:49 PM
 
Location: Cochise county, AZ
4,544 posts, read 3,010,212 times
Reputation: 9433
Thank you. I just talked to my oldest brother and he said the same thing. It is going to be a crying night tonight. He was such a special person, it was his illness that changed him.
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Old 02-20-2016, 11:50 PM
 
Location: Florida Gulf Coast
4,089 posts, read 5,502,748 times
Reputation: 6412
I am so so sorry, Meo. My son is a "lost soul" and I have been dealing with his issues for 20+ years. Every time I get a phone call from an area code "back home", I am afraid of the news that it will bring. One time last year, I hadn't heard from him in so long that I called the coroner's office to see if they had any unidentified bodies of young males. The heartache of a mother with this type of child is unending, and it's so difficult not being able to talk to anyone who understands....so I just keep it all inside. I hope you can find some solace in knowing that his soul is at peace now.
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Old 02-24-2016, 03:13 PM
 
Location: Cochise county, AZ
4,544 posts, read 3,010,212 times
Reputation: 9433
Avalon, If there is a Family to Family group near you, this really helped me. It's been a long time since I went to it but it was a 6 week course & I learned a lot. I also had the opportunity to be with other people who had the same problems with their kids. What a relief that was, to be able to be open finally.

I also went to a group meeting when my son was in the phych ward at the hospital.

Yes, I am glad he is at peace. My heart still hurts & probably always will, but I am glad his pain is over.

NAMI, National Association for Mental Illness. They're the ones that held the classes.

Last edited by meo92953; 02-24-2016 at 03:17 PM.. Reason: Addition
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