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Old 03-26-2016, 05:20 AM
 
Location: Pennsylvania
42 posts, read 15,947 times
Reputation: 56

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In 1982 my brother was struck and killed by a drunk driver. He was 23 years old and had a baby on the way.
It took me a long time to forgive but forgetting is not an option.
I think the strangeness of siblibg death is that somewhere inside it forces us to take mortality seriously.
Because of that when the same thing happened to me,being stuck by a drunk driver in a sedan, I had a few seconds of terrible fear followed by anger, then a few months of crutches .
John's death put my injuries in perspective and gave me something powerful to hold onto and to be thankful for.
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Old 05-18-2016, 11:37 AM
 
1 posts, read 562 times
Reputation: 19
It's been 1 year this month since I've lost my sister. She had cancer. I was there when she took her last breath.
People are telling me how I should act, and it make me so mad, because like you said, no one can understand, except those who have lost a sibling too. I wish i had someone who lost their sister to talk to. I need to express all of this pain everyday. I miss her so much.
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Old 05-18-2016, 12:02 PM
 
Location: Dallas, TX and Las Vegas, NV
5,075 posts, read 3,772,849 times
Reputation: 10047
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pollen1201 View Post
It's been 1 year this month since I've lost my sister. She had cancer. I was there when she took her last breath.
People are telling me how I should act, and it make me so mad, because like you said, no one can understand, except those who have lost a sibling too. I wish i had someone who lost their sister to talk to. I need to express all of this pain everyday. I miss her so much.
There are Support groups for those who have lost loved ones
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Old 05-19-2016, 03:45 PM
 
3,962 posts, read 5,248,587 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pollen1201 View Post
It's been 1 year this month since I've lost my sister. She had cancer. I was there when she took her last breath.
People are telling me how I should act, and it make me so mad, because like you said, no one can understand, except those who have lost a sibling too. I wish i had someone who lost their sister to talk to. I need to express all of this pain everyday. I miss her so much.
I have not lost a sibling. I have lost my parents and my husband and others I loved, but not one of my sisters. So I know I cannot completely identify with your loss. But I can say that no one should tell you how to act. Your grief is individual to you. Perhaps these folks have had few losses (so far) and don't realize that there is no universal time table or standards for grieving. People who are your friends should listen and commiserate if they can, and they can even make suggestions, but no one should presume to know that your grieving is right or wrong for you. Yes, it would be good to talk to others who have lost siblings, but bear in mind that no two relationships are the same, so no one can really know what your sister's loss feels like except you. Let me say here that a sensitive, caring friend can be of great help even if their loss has not been the same. I had a close friend who was extremely helpful to me when my husband was ill and after he died. She had never lost a spouse, but had gone through care giving and the loss of two brothers. She never said "I know what you are feeling" because she knew she didn't. But her loving care of me in my loss was such a gift.
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Old 05-20-2016, 10:11 AM
 
Location: Maryland
421 posts, read 884,867 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hautemomma View Post
I'd be interested in hearing the experiences of those who've lost siblings. Yes, grief is universal, but the grief of surviving siblings seems overshadowed by those who've lost children, spouses and parents. I think sibling grief is somewhat unique phenomenon and process unto itself, and it's hard to connect with a community of individuals who've experienced this, even within grief support groups. I lost my brother who was only 2 1/2 years older than me very recently, and I'd like to be in touch with some people who know what this type of loss is like, even as an adult. I'd also like to gather a sense of what my future may look like, in terms of this process, my changed identity and so on.

I don't know about your religion or philosophy, but I did lose my sister to murder and my 13 year old son was killed by a driver on drugs. For me the only relief I got was to see a medium, which helped me more than any book could or getting awful advice from people.


I suggest going to the website of George Anderson, www.georgeanderson.com He is the most tested medium in the world and has helped me so much. I did hear from my son, numerous times from another medium, and went to where is now, in the spirit world, through a past life regression with Brian Weiss, www.brianweiss.com


Take care,
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Old 05-21-2016, 04:31 PM
 
Location: Southern California
748 posts, read 983,851 times
Reputation: 1071
My brother took his own life. He shot himself in his truck. Our mom was already gone and I am thankful that she did not have to experience the loss of a child in such a way. I still miss him. It is hard to understand. When a person takes their own life, it leaves open wounds that can not completely heal as there are so many unanswered questions.
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Old 05-22-2016, 09:23 AM
 
Location: Maryland
421 posts, read 884,867 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WorldKlas View Post
There are Support groups for those who have lost loved ones

a good support site is www.grieving.com. It was known originally as Beyond Indigo. The site covers most issues relating to loss.
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Old 05-22-2016, 11:27 AM
 
5,811 posts, read 3,298,927 times
Reputation: 13548
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pollen1201 View Post
It's been 1 year this month since I've lost my sister. She had cancer. I was there when she took her last breath.
People are telling me how I should act, and it make me so mad, because like you said, no one can understand, except those who have lost a sibling too. I wish i had someone who lost their sister to talk to. I need to express all of this pain everyday. I miss her so much.

I too lost my sister to cancer. It's been over 10 years now, and the feeling of loss is no less. She was the only person remaining who had been in my life since birth. We knew each other's thoughts, body language, just all of it to a degree not possible with others. I can still cry about it and still can't talk about her to other people. It has been much harder than loosing my parents, because you always expect to loose them someday. My dad had a hard time with the fact that he outlived her. My mom died young, well before my sweet sister.
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Old 05-23-2016, 08:01 PM
Status: "Even better than okay" (set 8 days ago)
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
51,204 posts, read 50,499,962 times
Reputation: 60095
Yesterday my late brother's daughter got married. It was bittersweet. He should have been there.

He liked AC/DC so my niece had one of their songs played first at the reception. Then her uncle danced with her to "Little Red Balloon" and she had red balloons floating around. Tears...
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Old 05-24-2016, 06:54 AM
 
994 posts, read 1,108,609 times
Reputation: 1225
Quote:
Originally Posted by seethelight View Post
I don't know about your religion or philosophy, but I did lose my sister to murder and my 13 year old son was killed by a driver on drugs. For me the only relief I got was to see a medium, which helped me more than any book could or getting awful advice from people.


I suggest going to the website of George Anderson, www.georgeanderson.com He is the most tested medium in the world and has helped me so much. I did hear from my son, numerous times from another medium, and went to where is now, in the spirit world, through a past life regression with Brian Weiss, www.brianweiss.com


Take care,
Thanks for your response and suggestions. The idea of consulting a medium has actually popped into my mind a few times, as I do believe that some experiences we deem "paranormal" or "supernatural" are true, actual facets and possibilities of our existences. However, I do wonder about finding a good one and not being taken advantage of. Did you actually have a reading with George Anderson?
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