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Old 05-18-2016, 11:58 AM
 
Location: Arizona
5,577 posts, read 4,780,727 times
Reputation: 16482

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Quote:
Originally Posted by seain dublin View Post
Well let me explain it to you. A card is something you can hold onto, and it can bring you comfort later on. It also shows some effort by the person who sent it. Most people take the time to pick out an appropriate card and write something it in as well. That certainly beats an email with a sad face.

I got a card from two doctor's offices after my dad passed, I was moved. I also got a card from a woman I grew up with(hadn't seen or spoke with her in decades but she found my dad passed), she wrote a few paragraphs in her card about our childhood. She is also a teacher and was using some stories about my dad in her classroom, again very moving.

That's the purpose of sympathy cards.
Some people will never get it. Maybe they were never raised that way.

I sent a card and note this morning.
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Old 05-23-2016, 08:34 PM
Status: "Even better than okay" (set 7 days ago)
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
51,191 posts, read 50,480,930 times
Reputation: 60076
It meant a great deal to me to get sympathy cards when my father and my brother died. Even from people that didn't know them. Yes, someone saying they are sorry does mean something.
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Old 05-23-2016, 10:51 PM
 
26,163 posts, read 14,453,442 times
Reputation: 17235
Ya it does...... IT SHOWS YOU THERE ARE PPL IN THE WORLD WHO STILL CARE!!

Im so sorry about your brother and father
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Old 05-23-2016, 11:01 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles>Little Rock>Houston>Little Rock
6,488 posts, read 6,596,921 times
Reputation: 17327
I think so. I got one card when my husband died last month. Oddly enough, it was from my previous husband's ex-wife. I did not get a card from her when our mutual husband passed on.
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Old 05-24-2016, 03:10 AM
 
26,163 posts, read 14,453,442 times
Reputation: 17235
Im so sorry Maggie for your loss
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Old 05-25-2016, 10:35 AM
 
994 posts, read 1,108,328 times
Reputation: 1225
Sympathy cards do still matter. Unfortunately, it appears that all too few people realize this. Social media messages and verbal words of condolence are appreciated, but as someone earlier posted, having something to hold on to - something tangible - is significant.
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Old 05-25-2016, 01:30 PM
 
2,031 posts, read 1,505,539 times
Reputation: 4408
Receiving an email or a "like" on Facebook is too impersonal and in poor taste. IMHO.

I sent a card to my neighbor. His wife recently passed away. I went to her funeral and paid my respects to the entire family, but still sent a card. He sent me a pre-printed acknowledgment card and replied with a personal note.
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Old 05-25-2016, 02:05 PM
 
2,563 posts, read 3,083,225 times
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Just last week, my lifelong friend's father passed away. He/they live three time zones away. I contacted my friend and his wife and offered to help in any way I could, including financially. My GF immediately purchased a Sympathy card. Before asking me to write something on the card, she asked if it was even a good idea to send one. Knowing my friend as well as I do, I thanked her for the intention and told her it would be best to not send a card.


Sending a card to my friend would be akin to reaffirming the painful passing of his beloved father. In this case, a call and text offering any and all possible help is better than a card. Sending a card may place the receiver in the awkward position of feeling obligated to respond to the sender which may resurface the pain of the passing.
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Old 05-25-2016, 02:34 PM
 
Location: Alexandria, VA
10,712 posts, read 19,040,812 times
Reputation: 14653
Receiving a card doesn't "reaffirm the passing" - he KNOWS his father passed - a card is something you should send, along w/any nice/funny stories/thoughts about his father.
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Old 05-25-2016, 06:30 PM
 
Location: Arizona
5,577 posts, read 4,780,727 times
Reputation: 16482
Quote:
Originally Posted by chacho_keva View Post
Just last week, my lifelong friend's father passed away. He/they live three time zones away. I contacted my friend and his wife and offered to help in any way I could, including financially. My GF immediately purchased a Sympathy card. Before asking me to write something on the card, she asked if it was even a good idea to send one. Knowing my friend as well as I do, I thanked her for the intention and told her it would be best to not send a card.


Sending a card to my friend would be akin to reaffirming the painful passing of his beloved father. In this case, a call and text offering any and all possible help is better than a card. Sending a card may place the receiver in the awkward position of feeling obligated to respond to the sender which may resurface the pain of the passing.
A call yes, a text no. A card still should be sent. "reaffirming the painful passing" is probably the worst excuse I have ever heard of.

So when a person sends thank you notes for the people that sent gifts, memorial contributions, or whatever they may have done it would be " feeling obligated to respond to the sender". I can't believe this.
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