U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Grief and Mourning
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
View Poll Results: Who would you spend that extra day with?
Friend 10 7.63%
Lover 16 12.21%
Family 105 80.15%
Voters: 131. You may not vote on this poll

Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 07-26-2016, 09:18 PM
 
1,321 posts, read 847,220 times
Reputation: 1989

Advertisements

Cigar smoke in a hospital, something you wouldn't smell normally.
Love your post, wasn't able to rep you again!

And yes, I so agree with you and the afterlife, it is very much alive. Soul/Spirit
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 07-26-2016, 09:42 PM
 
635 posts, read 398,836 times
Reputation: 1762
Quote:
Originally Posted by NCN View Post
I have never understood anyone wanting to hang on to someone enough to want them to have to come back to this world. Yes I miss them but they are hopefully in a better place and I hope to see them again some day. Live and let live.
If you've never lost your spouse no, you can't understand. I would do anything to have just one more minute with my husband. I don't care if he's in a better place, he belongs here on Earth with me and his two year old daughter.

My cat died this year too, I miss her sometimes. I don't just miss my husband I ache for him and unless you've experienced the loss of a spouse it's easy to have the nonchalant “live and let live" philosophy.

I don't wish this pain on anyone and I truly hope that you never have to go through what I have.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-26-2016, 10:33 PM
 
Location: Virginia
3,472 posts, read 1,671,571 times
Reputation: 9303
I would want one more day with my Dad, who died in the hospital before I could get there; and my Mom, who died in her sleep. Also, another day with my husband, even though I was holding his hand when he died. And finally, a man I loved (a long time before I met my husband), because he committed suicide. I'd like to have an extra day to try and talk with him about whatever was troubling him so very much.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-27-2016, 12:03 AM
 
Location: Alabama!
5,803 posts, read 15,532,399 times
Reputation: 4272
I said goodbye to my dad one Friday evening and he died on Sunday on a trip out of town. I miss him terribly.
But I'd choose my mom, even though we so often didn't get along. All those stories she told about growing up, and her family and our ancestors...that I thought I'd remember...I seem to now only remember bits and pieces.

And apologize to her for not insisting that someone come check her. She was in the hospital, having a hard time breathing, but she kept going to sleep. Only now I see it was congestive heart failure. Which is what I'll probably die of.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-27-2016, 01:09 AM
 
Location: Booth Texas
13,459 posts, read 4,316,648 times
Reputation: 1313
Quote:
Originally Posted by melovescookies View Post
If you've never lost your spouse no, you can't understand. I would do anything to have just one more minute with my husband. I don't care if he's in a better place, he belongs here on Earth with me and his two year old daughter.

My cat died this year too, I miss her sometimes. I don't just miss my husband I ache for him and unless you've experienced the loss of a spouse it's easy to have the nonchalant “live and let live" philosophy.

I don't wish this pain on anyone and I truly hope that you never have to go through what I have.
Sweet, this is some real stuff you begin a good book with. Talk from real people to real people.


Is there anything greater than misery?


I always held mine like a precious stone.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-27-2016, 01:13 AM
 
Location: Booth Texas
13,459 posts, read 4,316,648 times
Reputation: 1313
Quote:
Originally Posted by Southlander View Post
I said goodbye to my dad one Friday evening and he died on Sunday on a trip out of town. I miss him terribly.
But I'd choose my mom, even though we so often didn't get along. All those stories she told about growing up, and her family and our ancestors...that I thought I'd remember...I seem to now only remember bits and pieces.

And apologize to her for not insisting that someone come check her. She was in the hospital, having a hard time breathing, but she kept going to sleep. Only now I see it was congestive heart failure. Which is what I'll probably die of.

O No, I have seen your end, it aint heart failure.


Aint nothing like mom, I was like the only person who chose a friend, but who knows, I might had chose mom but she is still alive. I can't even imagine.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-27-2016, 01:28 AM
 
Location: Booth Texas
13,459 posts, read 4,316,648 times
Reputation: 1313
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyndarn View Post
Hands Down!! Family ( Mother)..as it happened..I was scheduled to visit on a Sunday..but was sick as a Dog..So called her ( had arranged for a phone direct to her)..Other than her getting a mask..she said nothing other than..Love YOU and see you later)..She died about 8 hours after.. I did NOT got because I did NOT want to expose her to whatever I had...BUT when My brother called to tell me I( he was the primary contact person)..I about fell apart..cried all my way to meet up with my brother and his son ( my nephew)..

SO YES..I would have loved to have had that one extra day..BUT in truth..my mother and I had always had a very open and honest relationship...She made things so clear to me..over my lifetime..supported most everything..tho did push back occasionally..BUT Geesh..I don't think I would have been the person I am today IF it wasn't for her~~

She died over 21 years ago...and I still have dreams that include this tiny, but powerful women..have missed her everyday..BUT she knows that..as I'm sure her sprit is watching over me..But that's just because I happen to believe in the Soul/Spirit survives..I've felt it.sensed it..especially when stressed, I so happen to be someone believes and has faith that WE will meet up again..But again..another topic

As for the other choices...Lover ( never really had one such labeled) Nope and friends .. I've been blessed with healthy friends..SO can't say at this point~~

Boy I feel good expressing these thoughts..TY for asking OP





I have been meaning to post a thread on heaven, It aint what people think it is. When you die, you go into a warm glow of love and you remember.


I think.


I believe we are just here to gain a new perspective and that we are to learn and grow love.


WHY do I regret the last moments of people's lives? It's like I am so vain to think I could have changed fate but I have been around a lot of dying people.




My greatest regrets, things I can't seem to let go is the last meeting I had with my father and my grandmother, his mother.


I just got my dad in the emergency room and then and went to park the car and I took a couple min to smoke before I walked back in and he was in cardiac arrest when I walked up on him and although there were doctors and nurses all around, nobody even noticed and I started screaming.


Almost went to jail and it seems I will never excuse that stupid couple of min that I relaxed to smoke because when I walked in, I knew more than the doctors and if I had not taken those couple min, who knows.


Then it is vain and stupid for me to consider that anyone could have changed fate, maybe they learned what they needed to learn and so they go back.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-27-2016, 02:34 AM
 
Location: Booth Texas
13,459 posts, read 4,316,648 times
Reputation: 1313
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChrisTK View Post
I actually say my great-grandmother on my moms side.

She might not be happy with me now, as she was very religious and catholic, but she held them together and made us get along, talk, and keep in contact. Since she died, we fell apart. I'd like one day but use that day to get her to tell us to grow together again.

That and just talk. Get information about my family and roots. Learn from her. I love knowing my background and ancestry. It's one thing to see it on a family tree. Another to hear it from a relative.
Seems like everything fell apart after my grandparents died.


We always went there for Christmas and Easter, my dad would carry us in asleep after a long road trip and we would wake up in feather beds with several hand made quilts about us cause it was freezing in east Texas, the smell of bacon waking you up and the warmth of walking in the main room with a fire going and a tree from the back 40.


It was magic, my grandfather called me,'' O'll sister Joel.''
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-27-2016, 07:46 AM
 
433 posts, read 213,845 times
Reputation: 897
My dear husband. He died at age 45 of a massive heart attack. I found him dead when I went to bed that evening. He was my husband, lover, and best friend and the father of my three children. He died 22 years ago. I have remarried but I still have him in my heart. I would love to see him for a day to thank him for being such a wonderful husband and father and to give him a chance to see the grandchildren he would have adored. I will never stop loving him.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-27-2016, 11:27 AM
 
1,321 posts, read 847,220 times
Reputation: 1989
I don't usually come to the grief and mourning thread, as it is just too much sadness for me. But, I am glad I did respond this time. I've enjoyed reading everyone's replies, and I'm sure we all have more we like to say. But just knowing that you have these 'special' memories of your loved ones that no one else has access too...well that makes them even more special and real, and they're all mine.

And no one can ever take them away from me...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Grief and Mourning
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top