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Old 12-30-2016, 04:55 PM
 
Location: New Mexico
5,098 posts, read 2,915,584 times
Reputation: 9418

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Recognizing that there are different forms and degrees of grief is important. As a participant in grief counselling it was very apparent that other participants were experiencing something different from what I was experiencing. Most thought they would be "through it" in about three months and most were wrong. I didn't join the group until almost a year had gone by and they all were very disappointed to see me. All sorts of factors weigh in -- guilt, brain chemistry, time, multiple losses, alone-ness, helplessness. I'm almost ten years out and grief is just a shadow on some days...not a constant presence...so time and refocusing seems to help in the long term. It'd the short term that seems so helpless.
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Old 01-02-2017, 03:28 PM
 
Location: SWFL
21,432 posts, read 18,144,759 times
Reputation: 18814
In 17 days it will be 5 years for me. The past 6 months have really been the turning point of my grief. It feels so good! I don't miss him any less but the raw pain is gone and I can live my life again. Like I keep telling people, your pain is your own, don't let anyone make you uncomfortable about the time. Struggle as long as you need to. It will come one day. You will never be the same but you will be able to go on.
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Old 01-03-2017, 10:18 AM
 
Location: Somewhere in northern Alabama
16,846 posts, read 51,301,408 times
Reputation: 27668
Quote:
Originally Posted by tamiznluv View Post
In 17 days it will be 5 years for me. The past 6 months have really been the turning point of my grief. It feels so good! I don't miss him any less but the raw pain is gone and I can live my life again. Like I keep telling people, your pain is your own, don't let anyone make you uncomfortable about the time. Struggle as long as you need to. It will come one day. You will never be the same but you will be able to go on.
Your 'nym has special meaning these days:
When the night is warm,
Soft and warm,
I long for his charms
I'd sing like a violin
If I were in his arms
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