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Old 03-11-2017, 12:39 AM
Location: Florida Gulf Coast
4,089 posts, read 5,504,645 times
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When my Mom died, someone sent me $275 cash anonymously. I still have no idea who it was, although I thought I recognized the handwriting of an ex-boyfriend. Although he would have had no idea whether I needed the money (which I did). Anyway, it was wrapped up in white paper and I sure appreciated it.

Usually if I think someone could use the money, I send them a check (even if they ask for donations to charity). In the card, I tell them to use the money however it's needed. Some people list charities because it's considered kind of tacky to ask for donations to yourself.
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Old 03-11-2017, 01:36 AM
3,964 posts, read 5,252,569 times
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I received $50 cash from one person when my husband died. It may sound funny, but I had never even heard of sending cash to people after a loss. Since it came from someone at church, I even talked to my pastor about it, as it totally confused me. (It was right after my loss, and I was pretty confused about most everything.) I ended up donating it to the organization that I had designated and sending a thank you note saying that I had done that. I never would have kept it, as it seemed creepy to me to benefit financially from my husband's death. I now recognize that some people do need this, and this forum has actually educated me on this. I don't know why I didn't know about this (and I'm not young.) Perhaps it is partly because my church tradition is that memorial services don't cost anything unless you buy flowers for the church. In my case, the service was right before Christmas and the sanctuary was decorated with poinsettias, and I chose not to add anything to that. The memorial committee always provides the meal after, at no cost to me. I gave a voluntary donation to the church, but there was not "charge" to me for the service or lunch after. I know some people spend a lot of money on the service.
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