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Old 04-24-2017, 08:43 AM
2,031 posts, read 1,505,539 times
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Originally Posted by gentlearts View Post
OP, if you have a lot of equity in your house, you might look into a reverse mortgage.
Check his first post. He's not a home owner.
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Old 04-24-2017, 11:13 PM
3,962 posts, read 5,247,246 times
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Originally Posted by RosemaryT View Post
My husband died 12 months ago. I'm a 57-year-old widow. I wish people wouldn't say "I'd be lost if my husband/wife died." Or the other one, "I'd just lay down and die if my spouse died. I couldn't live without him/her."

Several people said that to me at the funeral. It just twists the knife a little more.

I wish I could just "lay down and die" but that's not an option. I am the living dead right now, walking around and acting relatively normal, but dead inside. I knew that I'd outlive him, and I cherished every day, but I didn't think it'd end this soon.

The best response I've received is when people just hug me and cry with me.
Rosemary, I really do get your feelings. I thought so many times that I would prefer just to "go with" my husband. I was never suicidal, but I just wanted God to take me because living without my husband seemed more than I could take. I also knew I would outlive him. But he died at 65, and I didn't expect that. I never had anyone make the comments you listed. But it's obvious those people have not lived through something like this. But I had other insensitive remarks made. Its just part of what you have to live through. I am now 2.5 years out from losing my husband, and I no longer wish to die. I am beginning to live again. I have not figured it out completely, but I know that he would be happy with my progress. Whenever I see some joy coming into my life, I sort of feel him smiling. I hope things start going that way for you, too.
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Old 04-26-2017, 03:18 PM
Location: Richmond
1,408 posts, read 699,315 times
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Sorry for your Loss.

I lost my first wife 9 years ago on the 11 of this month.

My best friend died on March 29th 2017 as well. He and I had been friends for 27 years.

I do know what you are going through. All I can say is it gets little easier with the passage of time.
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