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Old 04-26-2017, 03:40 PM
 
Location: Richmond
1,408 posts, read 699,750 times
Reputation: 1527

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Sorry for your Loss.


I do understand what you are going through, I lost my wife 9 years ago on the 11th of this month. I was 40 at that time, my wife was 48.


I went to work and my wife was alive and well, I came home from work and found her on the couch dead. I called 911, tried to revive her, and the fire department said there was nothing they could do for her. It was months before I could get rid of things. I could not sit on the end of the couch where my wife head was for months and months.


My first wife did not have the best of relationships with her daughter. I called her at 1 in the morning to advise that her mother had gone.


By August of 2008, only 4 months after her mother had died, the Daughter had called up, and wanted the furniture that had belonged to her grandmother. Since if was already my wife's parents furniture that we had taken when they died, I had little objection to giving the daughter the family's furniture.


My best friend of 27 years died almost a month ago. I had always been good friends with the family. I had gone over to his house to help the family in cleaning up. My friend still has a fair amount of items that he and I had been investing in together. In this case reloading ammo. so there is brass, powder, primers, and the bullets it's self. For me even though I have paid for almost off of those components, I am not about to start any kind of fight over it. The family is still really cool, told me I can take as long as I want to get the components, I could even leave it their and come out and reload if I want too. But in that case I think I would feel kind of of funny to go to their house to reload. Going out to say hello is one thing, but going to reload ammo would be another.


All I wanted back, and I was in no hurry about that was some knick knack's that I had given my friend, and a Dragon Stein that I had made for him years ago. But even that was not worth causing a problem over.


Again sorry for you loss.
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Old 04-26-2017, 04:39 PM
 
Location: South Carolina
13,104 posts, read 17,640,353 times
Reputation: 22444
I;m so sorry for your loss . Boy ya know it just never amazes how the cockroaches come out of the woodwork when someone dies . It happened when my aunt Edina died , she had a lovely white piano and everyone was calling and wanting her white piano . Well we had finally had enough and started asking folks calling for it what piece do you want I'm cutting it up now . I am team don't give her anything considering the relationship she had with your late wife . Most of all take care of yourself , get plenty of rest and eat . When my first husband died I lost 87 lbs and everyone was worried about me . Rest assured you will move on but don't do anything drastic for a year .You will have a life again and please know that it is okay to live again . God bless you and comfort you in your time of loss and grief.
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Old 04-26-2017, 06:32 PM
 
567 posts, read 212,672 times
Reputation: 1427
I'm so very sorry for your loss. You have excellent advice here. The fact that the sister didn't even attend the funeral shows she is only out for anything of monetary value, so do NOT let her in your house to snoop around. Do get the advice of an attorney too. Again, I'm so sorry for your loss. 44 is way too young to die.
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Old 04-26-2017, 06:53 PM
 
3,263 posts, read 2,839,361 times
Reputation: 4655
I am sorry for your loss.

I was in a very similar situation nearly 10 months ago. As far as MI law, YOU are the heir of your wife's things. Her sister should MHOB.

IMHO, people who can't find it within themselves to see the deceased prior to death had no business sticking in their nose where it doesn't belong. I'm frustrated that those type of people will never "get" how ridiculous they are.

Stepping down off my soapbox, I highly recommend you get an estate attorney. I did just that so that no one could later try to find fault with the outcome, since an attorney has to go by the law & he/she is objective.
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Old 04-26-2017, 07:18 PM
 
Location: Saint John, IN
10,638 posts, read 3,314,105 times
Reputation: 12748
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ellwood View Post
Recently had two friends pass without Wills. Not sure why people neglect this important document. Without a Will the lawyer gets rich. Definitely go and see an attorney. Since you are her spouse in most states everything passes to you. I would not let the sister enter your home. If your wife was not close with her, there was a reason. I would give things away before I gave her anything. Don't let her play on your emotional state.
Sorry OP for you loss!


Yes in most states you are the heir and everything will pass to you; however, if the home was only in her name the attorney will need to take care of that so the deed is transferred to your name. If your wife was not close to her sister then I would definitely not allow her into your home. IF you want to give her anything then meet her somewhere like a restaurant and give it to her there. Otherwise ignore her!
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Old 04-26-2017, 07:29 PM
 
4,108 posts, read 3,447,161 times
Reputation: 8179
Quote:
Originally Posted by CGab View Post
Sorry OP for you loss!


Yes in most states you are the heir and everything will pass to you; however, if the home was only in her name the attorney will need to take care of that so the deed is transferred to your name. If your wife was not close to her sister then I would definitely not allow her into your home. IF you want to give her anything then meet her somewhere like a restaurant and give it to her there. Otherwise ignore her!
Good advice about the off site meet. But wait until after the estate is completely settled.
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Old 04-26-2017, 07:41 PM
 
Location: Somewhere in America
12,305 posts, read 10,048,458 times
Reputation: 20460
I'm sorry for your loss. I would stop all communication with the sister. The estate will need to go through court since there's no will. I would speak to an estate attorney ASAP to see what your legal rights are. They vary dramatically in every state.

As far as the sister, I would tell her that the estate is being handled by an attorney and she will need to contact the court. Don't speak to her anymore.
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Old 04-26-2017, 07:49 PM
 
Location: Somewhere in America
12,305 posts, read 10,048,458 times
Reputation: 20460
I also would not that sister in the house for ANY reason! You owe her nothing. In a few months - if you're up for it - ask her if there's anything specific she would like. And YOU decide if you want to part with those items. She does NOT dictate anything!

Sadly, it always amazes me the losers that come climbing out from under their rocks when someone dies. The one's who come out within days of someone's passing really are cockroaches!
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Old 04-26-2017, 07:49 PM
 
Location: Georgia, USA
21,485 posts, read 26,089,700 times
Reputation: 26440
Quote:
Originally Posted by ss20ts View Post
I'm sorry for your loss. I would stop all communication with the sister. The estate will need to go through court since there's no will. I would speak to an estate attorney ASAP to see what your legal rights are. They vary dramatically in every state.

As far as the sister, I would tell her that the estate is being handled by an attorney and she will need to contact the court. Don't speak to her anymore.
The sister would have no standing to "contact the court" unless she could prove that OP's wife had something that belonged to the sister.
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Old 04-26-2017, 08:10 PM
 
Location: home state of Myrtle Beach!
6,233 posts, read 18,123,468 times
Reputation: 3419
Sorry for your loss. My Dad died without a will almost 5 years ago. Everything reverted to his wife and his children in equal shares. Go to Probate Court in your county of residence. They will help you fill out the forms and help you decide if the sister is an heir or not.
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