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Old 07-26-2017, 10:22 AM
 
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So my friend has had some devastating losses in the past several months, including the loss of a child and a parent. Her birthday is today, and I want to send her birthday wishes, but "Happy Birthday" seems so flippant as she prepares for another funeral. Any ideas how to acknowledge the day for her?
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Old 07-26-2017, 12:29 PM
 
Location: Midvale, Idaho
1,428 posts, read 2,252,516 times
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Just send her a Thinking about you kind of card.

My hubby died 4 days before my birthday last year. Since I can not eat cake or anything like that and really no plans for celebrating my friend bought me a Rib Eye Steak and a candle. Note to self. Candles will melt in a hot steak. Of course I am sure your friends situation is much different than mine. But it totally meant the world to me my friend was so thoughtful of my feelings and dietary needs. And I would never buy a rib eye for myself and she knows this.

I am not sure flowers for her would be good now either because she might be a little overwhelmed by them because of the funeral she is preparing for. Maybe in your card tell her when she is ready it is a pass for a nice day out. Maybe a massage for her.

Hard times I only wanted to just be left alone. I unplugged the phone and locked my doors. Not that any one was going to come by. Except my friend and she came the day before.
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Old 07-26-2017, 01:54 PM
 
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I would send a subdued birthday card (nothing funny or light). If appropriate maybe something with a religious feel. Your friend has suffered many loses. It would be a shame to not acknowledge HER day. Maybe as a gift- volunteer to cook dinner or clean/ do laundry. Maybe breakfast out and offer to help send out Thank You cards afterwards. You are with her and knows what she needs. Play it "by ear."
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Old 07-26-2017, 03:20 PM
 
13,007 posts, read 12,434,284 times
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I'm going to visit the spa where I get my eyebrows done tomorrow. I'll get her a gift certificate there for a massage. It will be a day late, but I think she'll find it useful.

Thanks for the ideas!
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Old 07-26-2017, 04:00 PM
 
Location: Midvale, Idaho
1,428 posts, read 2,252,516 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector View Post
I'm going to visit the spa where I get my eyebrows done tomorrow. I'll get her a gift certificate there for a massage. It will be a day late, but I think she'll find it useful.

Thanks for the ideas!
Yes and give her a chance to choose when she feels she is ready for this.I had the same friend that brought me the steak gift me a facial massage. I held onto it for several months but when I finally felt up to it It was really so nice and relaxing. Body massage would be nice too. Just make it so she can decide when she feels up to doing it.
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Old 07-26-2017, 05:24 PM
 
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Such kind souls you are.
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