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Old 08-08-2017, 11:56 AM
 
Location: North Carolina
815 posts, read 409,257 times
Reputation: 1140

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By "violent" I mean torture, murder, extremely painful death/accident, prolonged agony, etc. (We're not talking about old people succumbing to cancer or a car wreck where someone was killed instantly. there are plenty of these here already) Please share your stories if you have any. I'd like to hear how you dealt with it. How you went on.

A friend of mine was mangled and pinned inside a car following a tractor trailer running a red light. It's believed that the truck driver fell asleep at the wheel. My friend and his dad (who was killed instantly) were going fishing and got up extra early that morning. Good samaritans tried to free him before first responders arrived but had to flee as the front of the car caught fire engulfing the engine in flames and thick smoke. Witnesses recall that he was screaming in pain and agony. By the time fire trucks arrived it was too late. This event really haunts me. What he must've been thinking and feeling as his crushed body was being roasted. There's nothing I can do to change what happened but I feel sick to my stomach when I ponder on what it must've been like for him. What it must've been like for his mom to bury her husband and only child. I want to cry when I think about it... this was 20 years ago and I can't honestly say I've gotten over it. Time just sort of buries it until it's back on the surface.
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Old 08-08-2017, 05:18 PM
 
Location: Somewhere in northern Alabama
16,836 posts, read 51,286,023 times
Reputation: 27639
One of the benefits of reading the Bible and about the lives of saints, and history in general, is the exposure to the horrible deaths that many have had, which make deaths of those who were close to you, but not involving that protracted level of suffering, a little more tolerable. In your friend's case, the pain was for minutes and not hours or days. That is scant consolation, but when you compare the healthy days he had to that short time period, it can help some.

I had a cousin who was apprenticing as a linesman and was electrocuted, falling from the power pole with massive burns. He lingered for about three days. The entire extended family just kept wondering and repeating "why?"

For whatever reason, I've found that embracing the full impact of a death at the time and working though the hardest parts right then can reduce the intensity of the later recollections. They are still there, but not as wrenching. That said, it may not work for other people.

Be aware that your reaction may more be to the extreme pain than to the death and loss itself. If so, there may be elements of PTSD involved.
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Old 08-08-2017, 07:55 PM
 
Location: North Carolina
815 posts, read 409,257 times
Reputation: 1140
Quote:
Originally Posted by harry chickpea View Post
For whatever reason, I've found that embracing the full impact of a death at the time and working though the hardest parts right then can reduce the intensity of the later recollections. They are still there, but not as wrenching. That said, it may not work for other people.
.
I may have to try this
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Old 08-09-2017, 02:49 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
22,690 posts, read 21,741,083 times
Reputation: 27742
Not good, but perhaps he was screaming out of fear. Maybe.

I've had, been in, several serious accidents. I've been lucky, because they didn't really hurt. Shock is a wonderful thing. Sometimes a paper cut hurts more than the thing that might kill you.
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Old 08-13-2017, 03:58 PM
 
Location: Columbia SC
7,944 posts, read 6,706,083 times
Reputation: 10701
An uncle whose car hit a tree and he died. Closed casket funeral.
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Old 08-13-2017, 03:59 PM
 
Location: Columbia SC
7,944 posts, read 6,706,083 times
Reputation: 10701
An uncle whose car hit a tree and he died.
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Old 08-17-2017, 10:42 AM
 
Location: St Augustine
233 posts, read 285,278 times
Reputation: 371
Aunt, car jacked...drove out to the woods and one of the car jackers pointed a sawed off shotgun to her face and pulled the trigger, blew her head off. they found her body a month later. It actually made national news and was in The Readers Digest. Her and her husband had a one year old son and she had stopped off at the grocery store to pick up diapers when it happened. Of course Uncle M. blamed himself because he didn't go to the store. this was in the mid 90's.
Aunt J. was thrown into the trunk and she thought she was going to be robbed and took all her jewelry off and stuffed them in her sock, that is where they found her necklace, bracelet and rings.

We didn't know anything for a month other than her gas card was being used going south on I95 from NC to FL. Long story , they caught the two guys and both are serving life in prison.
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