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Old 01-28-2018, 09:28 PM
 
Location: southern born and southern bred
12,480 posts, read 14,380,132 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Coldjensens View Post
I think it depends on the pet and the person. I am still grieving my bird who died in February of last year after 30 years. However when our cat dies, I will have a celebration. She has been dead for five years and just forgot to notice it.
Excuse my confusion but can you explain your comments about your cat to this dumb blonde??
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Old 01-28-2018, 10:15 PM
 
Location: SW Florida
2,298 posts, read 1,671,848 times
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I just seen this thread and wanted to post because I'm going through the same.. Lost our baby June 25th(it was his 5th bday..) he had been struggling with epilepsy for almost a year and got worse where meds weren't controlling it. Took him to ER and they couldn't get them to stop. It was awful letting him go. It's been about 7 months and I still grieve for him.. think about him almost daily still and cry now and then. Trying to 'move on' but we don't have kids and he truely was our world.. didn't realize it so much till we lost him. Never thought a pet would impact me so hard.

There is no normal.. my mom still misses a dog she had a long, long time ago. I'm expecting it will be the same for me.. he was just very special to us. So sorry for the loss.. time helps but doesn't mean it fully goes away.
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Old 01-29-2018, 06:32 AM
 
588 posts, read 122,340 times
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I wanna extend my love and say how sorry I am Icemodeled


Peace and love to you my friend... (Normal is just a made up word..... You are right... There is NO NORM for anything)
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Old 01-29-2018, 04:31 PM
Status: "I'm late because I don't want to be here." (set 5 days ago)
 
991 posts, read 541,671 times
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Everyone who is struggling with pet grief do get a book called "Goodbye, Friend".
I was skeptical about how a book would be able to help and I felt cheap and weird buying it but IT WORKED.
Written to our sub-conscious, it heals without our conscious mind even knows it's happening.
And we can then move on to give a new pet a good home and the LOVE keeps going. It will tell you when you are ready to adopt a new pet from a SHELTER or Humane Society.
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Old 01-29-2018, 07:54 PM
 
Location: Floyd Co, VA
3,305 posts, read 4,845,013 times
Reputation: 6913
I lost my heart dog extraordinaire in June 2006. I am so glad that there were 3 other dogs who needed me to get up out of bed and take care of their needs. He has been the inspiration for me to go on and adopt 10 senior black labs, some were with me less than a year, some I was fortunate to have for over 3 years.

Loosing them is never easy but I can say from experience that gradually the acute sharp pain changes to a dull ache. There will always be a bit of scar tissue on your heart from each loss. I can also say that in the long run the love, the goofiness and the joy always far outweigh the sorrow.

I'll go through it three more times with my current sweet old seniors but I will never regret my great fortune in sharing my life with so many wonderful dogs.
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Old 01-29-2018, 08:50 PM
 
10,436 posts, read 4,097,952 times
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I just ordered the book "Goodbye, Friend". It's been less than a year since my precious little Annie passed away and I still think about her all the time and wish she was still with me. She was a deaf little Boston Terrier with so much spunk and love for life. Nothing slowed her down until the last few weeks, then almost overnight she didn't know who she was or where she was anymore. It was so heartbreaking and I knew I had to let her go when she stopped eating. The vet said she had severe dementia.
Now my other dog was diagnosed with a liver tumor last summer. I took him to a specialty vet, one of the best in the country and nothing could be done. They gave him 3 to 6 months to live. He's still with me and I'm so grateful he doesn't have any idea anything is wrong with him. Even though he now has an occasional bad day, he's still a very happy boy, waking me up every morning and acting like nothing is wrong. I'm now spoiling him rotten and appreciating every moment he's with me, but I'm bracing myself for the inevitable as I will be totally devastated all over again when he passes.
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Old 02-01-2018, 01:51 AM
 
Location: Las Vegas
731 posts, read 522,463 times
Reputation: 1478
Grief is as long as it takes. Whether a pet or a human loved one. It is hard enough to lose someone without the pressure of sticking to a time line for your grief. There is no right or wrong answer to this. As long as it takes. For you.
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Old 02-01-2018, 09:52 AM
 
Location: SWFL
21,442 posts, read 18,163,061 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PippySkiddles View Post
Excuse my confusion but can you explain your comments about your cat to this dumb blonde??
Lol, Pip, I think she/he was making a joke and doesn't like the cat very much. I have had 2 such animals I ended up not caring about in my life, one a dog and one a cat. When I think about all the pets I have had and loved, these two never come to my mind. Coldjensens' and your posts brought them to mind finally!
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Old 02-01-2018, 07:52 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
22,733 posts, read 21,787,854 times
Reputation: 27797
Quote:
Originally Posted by tamiznluv View Post
Lol, Pip, I think she/he was making a joke and doesn't like the cat very much. I have had 2 such animals I ended up not caring about in my life, one a dog and one a cat. When I think about all the pets I have had and loved, these two never come to my mind. Coldjensens' and your posts brought them to mind finally!
My son left his whiny cat with me when moved out. I feed her, clean her litter box, and give her treats. She has toys and I try to play with her...but she knows that I really don't care. I'm not sure why, maybe I do know, but I don't love her. I'll always take care of her. We all need or want someone to take care of us. This hissy burr only likes the one who left her.
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Old 02-14-2018, 02:00 PM
 
10,436 posts, read 4,097,952 times
Reputation: 14674
Quote:
Originally Posted by marino760 View Post
I just ordered the book "Goodbye, Friend". It's been less than a year since my precious little Annie passed away and I still think about her all the time and wish she was still with me. She was a deaf little Boston Terrier with so much spunk and love for life. Nothing slowed her down until the last few weeks, then almost overnight she didn't know who she was or where she was anymore. It was so heartbreaking and I knew I had to let her go when she stopped eating. The vet said she had severe dementia.
Now my other dog was diagnosed with a liver tumor last summer. I took him to a specialty vet, one of the best in the country and nothing could be done. They gave him 3 to 6 months to live. He's still with me and I'm so grateful he doesn't have any idea anything is wrong with him. Even though he now has an occasional bad day, he's still a very happy boy, waking me up every morning and acting like nothing is wrong. I'm now spoiling him rotten and appreciating every moment he's with me, but I'm bracing myself for the inevitable as I will be totally devastated all over again when he passes.
How ironic, two days after the book arrived I lost my precious boy. It became too obvious that he wasn't going to have another good day and stopped eating and I could see he was ready. I couldn't bear to see him hurting any more and took him to the vet one last final time.
Now I no longer hurry to come home from work to be with him. I'm no longer greeted by his kisses and happy face every day and the house is so empty. I've been slowly picking up his things and putting them away. His favorite ball will be saved as I'm certain he would have liked.
Although I keep thinking of the positive, about what a good life he had with me and where he may have ended up if I hadn't adopted him it's still hard, very hard.
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