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Old 11-12-2017, 08:55 AM
 
Location: Long Neck , DE
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As a person who has just received news it may be too late for treatment how do I get my adult son to accept this??
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Old 11-12-2017, 11:55 AM
 
Location: Somewhere in northern Alabama
16,852 posts, read 51,350,636 times
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Treatment for you? Your son? Your mate?

There are a few intertwined issues:

Treatment options and protocols (the mechanistic part of acceptance)
The positivity of holding out hope (which can improve odds even in extreme situations)
The inevitability of death, and acceptance of it as natural
Interpersonal relations which may not be complete to a state of balance that can transcend death

It pays to get second opinions, and going for one with your son might help with the first issue of acceptance.

Positivity has few downsides as long as reality is also attended to.

Inevitability might be better understood with relating of experiences with older relatives - grandparents, great-aunts and uncles, etc.

Interpersonal relations can be the most difficult, and compassion is key no matter how the subject is approached. There is some thought that a small amount of distancing prior to death can ease some of the initial pain of grief. The intent is to untangle interdependence and gently guide some threads of it to sources that will last beyond death.
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Old 11-18-2017, 09:27 AM
 
Location: southern born and southern bred
12,480 posts, read 14,377,470 times
Reputation: 19530
Quote:
Originally Posted by longneckone View Post
As a person who has just received news it may be too late for treatment how do I get my adult son to accept this??
you longneckone??? WTH???
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Old 11-18-2017, 10:45 AM
 
Location: Canada
5,139 posts, read 3,644,743 times
Reputation: 13545
So sorry if it is you or your son (hugs) There really isn't anything you can do. Sadly, it will just take time to sink in.
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Old 11-18-2017, 11:00 AM
 
Location: El paso,tx
1,500 posts, read 575,482 times
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I'm so sorry for the news. How old is your son? Who is the one with the diagnosis...You or him?
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Old 11-18-2017, 02:21 PM
 
Location: Canada
5,139 posts, read 3,644,743 times
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So sorry if it is you or your son who is sick. (hugs) There really isn't anything you can do sadly, other than just take time to let it sink in.
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Old 11-18-2017, 09:12 PM
 
Location: Tulare County, Ca
1,031 posts, read 608,957 times
Reputation: 1767
He posted this a few days ago:

Quote:
I am entering Cancer treatment today. !st Kemo in 1.5 hours
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Old 11-24-2017, 12:59 PM
 
Location: SWFL
21,439 posts, read 18,159,189 times
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I figured it was you, ln1. I am so sorry. IDK how to get your son to accept it. No child wants to loose their parents. I imagine time may be the only answer. Time and if YOU are able to bear up under the news. Talk to him about the cycle of life. We ALL must accept it no matter how much we don't want to. YOU had to accept it for your own parents. If your son or you, are men of Faith, fall on that.

God Bless you and yours. Peace be with you.
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Old 11-24-2017, 05:54 PM
 
4,857 posts, read 2,152,571 times
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I sincerely mean no disrespect for such a prognosis as this. I find that "acceptance" comes LONG after the shock, angst and trials of this terminal disease. Pushing the person to "accept" it is rarely works. The best is to allow them to go thru the stages when such news as this is placed upon their hearts and mind. Guide them and let them comfort you. Take each moment...embrace it.

There wasn't a person in the world that could move me to "accept" the inevitable. I had to go thru each stage before coming to terms with the pending loss. ANd even THEN, it hit me full steam.

I'm so sorry that this has been placed upon the family...its truly everyones burden...
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Old 11-30-2017, 01:11 PM
 
Location: PA
839 posts, read 959,231 times
Reputation: 1753
Acceptance unfortunately takes time...
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