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Old 01-20-2018, 01:36 PM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
14 posts, read 25,970 times
Reputation: 22

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OP, my input has a different, less rosy perspective, but I believe it too important to keep to myself: things will never be the same and may never get "better". The pain you feel may never go away, though it may diminish. This means you must build a coping strategy that enables you to continue life until you can flourish again.

I was not an only child. I was the youngest of 5 ... and at age 34 I had outlived my parents and siblings (who were no more than 10 years older than me). That was 10 years ago in September.

I was homeless for awhile after; realized I had no true friends at the time and decided to rebuild my life alone, to start new.

I moved to another country two three years ago, but still suffer loneliness (perhaps more now that I am in a different culture), but I embrace that loneliness and pain, because it reminds me how much love I had for my family and how much love remains for me to give when I meet friends and a significant other worthy of my love.

See, I believe because if experience that some "friends" really don't want a "sad sack" around and they do make in known by the way they treat you every other day of the year. I think it is detrimental to keep these types of connections just to avoid feeling lonely.

So where I live now, I have no close friends because I often seen as a "gringo" only valued for money or a visa. I choose not to invite that shallow behavior into my life, even though sometimes I really don't want to be alone.

And on those days I just go to the store and chat up the clerk. Or I go to the movies. I take a long walk. I text one of maybe 3 friends I still have.

No platitudes here from me: it may not get "easier", it may in fact, get harder. But you can and will become stronger if you focus on what is best for you and act accordingly.

If you do that, I believe you will start to experience more good days than bad, though the bad won't vanish completely. They'll hopefully just come less each week, less monthly, and then less yearly.
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