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Old 05-07-2018, 07:38 AM
 
Location: SWFL
21,062 posts, read 17,917,378 times
Reputation: 18375

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Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlearts View Post
My sister had the same for the last few weeks of her life. She was comfortable in her own home, and the nurses helped her husband and children through this hard time also.

Iím not sure if anyone has mentioned yet, that the hospice nurse can sign the death certificate for a person who dies at home, relieving the family of having the coroner or police involved.
Good information, gentlearts.
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Old 05-07-2018, 04:21 PM
 
Location: Maryland
415 posts, read 877,556 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by charlygal View Post
No offense, but unfortunately your husband was terminal. What could the hospice have done wrong with a patient in their last few days of life.

I know this is touchy but hospices have their place. The patients are there to die.
My wife is a hospice RN. Unfortunately the average stay in hospice is three days. The primary reasons are the patient doesn't want to admit they are dying, or the family is hoping for a miracle.
Hospice nurses provide pain relief and there are also hospice doctors that prescribe pain meds so the patients are not in any discomfort during their final days.

I hear too many stories that the families of hospice patients override the doctor's orders for morphine because they don't want their loved ones to become addicted. When you have weeks or a few months to live that is simply crazy. Going into hospice and dying a few days later is unfortunate, as the patient could have been hospice much earlier and had a much better experience.
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Old 05-07-2018, 06:22 PM
 
9,414 posts, read 14,839,525 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlearts View Post
My sister had the same for the last few weeks of her life. She was comfortable in her own home, and the nurses helped her husband and children through this hard time also.

Iím not sure if anyone has mentioned yet, that the hospice nurse can sign the death certificate for a person who dies at home, relieving the family of having the coroner or police involved.
This is all good to know! My experiences in hospitals have all been so lousey, I would much rather pass away at home....
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Old 05-07-2018, 07:54 PM
 
3,914 posts, read 5,194,120 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlearts View Post

Iím not sure if anyone has mentioned yet, that the hospice nurse can sign the death certificate for a person who dies at home, relieving the family of having the coroner or police involved.
I think this may vary some by state. My husband died in Texas. I believe if the person is known to by dying, there is no need for a coroner. The physician in charge can apparently sign, but it makes it easier if hospice is involved. Our hospice nurse, when we called her after my husband died, just sat at the dining room table and did all the paperwork, which made it much easier for us.
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Old 05-07-2018, 09:32 PM
 
Location: Somewhere in northern Alabama
16,702 posts, read 50,755,476 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by G Grasshopper View Post
I think this may vary some by state. My husband died in Texas. I believe if the person is known to by dying, there is no need for a coroner. The physician in charge can apparently sign, but it makes it easier if hospice is involved. Our hospice nurse, when we called her after my husband died, just sat at the dining room table and did all the paperwork, which made it much easier for us.
This is something that was upsetting to me. I knew exactly when my wife died and I knew that it was NOT of what was listed on the death certificate. Frankly, that "certificate" was an insult. A doctor who had never seen my wife, certified that the nurse who showed up long after her death was the arbitrator of when she died - because she had a stethoscope and a notebook, and the supposed cause of death was a matter of convenience to him that could have been easily corrected with a single call to her primary physician. May his gravestone be pillaged by groundhogs and fire ants and his legacy thwarted by incompetent librarians with alcohol problems.
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Old 05-07-2018, 10:32 PM
 
1,453 posts, read 1,376,972 times
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Not even a few minutes? That's horrible. They allowed us hours, and we needed every second of it.
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Old 05-08-2018, 09:02 AM
 
Location: SWFL
21,062 posts, read 17,917,378 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by harry chickpea View Post
This is something that was upsetting to me. I knew exactly when my wife died and I knew that it was NOT of what was listed on the death certificate. Frankly, that "certificate" was an insult. A doctor who had never seen my wife, certified that the nurse who showed up long after her death was the arbitrator of when she died - because she had a stethoscope and a notebook, and the supposed cause of death was a matter of convenience to him that could have been easily corrected with a single call to her primary physician. May his gravestone be pillaged by groundhogs and fire ants and his legacy thwarted by incompetent librarians with alcohol problems.
Quote:
Originally Posted by picardlx View Post
Not even a few minutes? That's horrible. They allowed us hours, and we needed every second of it.
Why are you so angry about that, Harry? Did it change anything about your wife's passing?

Nope, not even 60 seconds, pic.

To the husband of the hospice nurse, I didn't want any more or less meds for my hubby. I wanted a little dignity for him. Get him out of bed to use the bathroom to poop. Not have to go in a diaper and sit in it for who knows how long? I don't think he would have died that night if they had allowed him that one thing. I said I KNEW he was going to die that night just from his body language.
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Old 05-08-2018, 09:48 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
22,364 posts, read 21,386,967 times
Reputation: 27319
Quote:
Originally Posted by tamiznluv View Post
He died at 3:30 a.m. Well before any shift changes.
My mother died after 4 AM. I'm not sure of the exact time. My nephew and I got to the hospice first at 4:30. My brother and sister showed up shortly after. I could see that they'd tidied her up, combed her hair, and it looked like she was wearing a fresh gown. The sheets had been smoothed, and her hands placed just so. They didn't rush us out.

Thankfully, her doctor told us to choose a funeral home so that we wouldn't have to think about it, choose, when she died. Except for the fact that my mother died, it was a very positive experience.
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Old 05-09-2018, 10:17 AM
 
Location: SWFL
21,062 posts, read 17,917,378 times
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I am very glad many of you had positive experiences with Hospice. Wish mine had been but it wasn't. Actually my hubby's whole death was a FUBG experience. He laid on ice for 7 months because the VA Director of Cape Cod would not approve my husband for burial. Why?? Haven't a clue. Even the funeral director was royally upset. So I attended his funeral alone because after 7 months, nobody cared.
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Old 05-11-2018, 09:40 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
22,364 posts, read 21,386,967 times
Reputation: 27319
Quote:
Originally Posted by tamiznluv View Post
I am very glad many of you had positive experiences with Hospice. Wish mine had been but it wasn't. Actually my hubby's whole death was a FUBG experience. He laid on ice for 7 months because the VA Director of Cape Cod would not approve my husband for burial. Why?? Haven't a clue. Even the funeral director was royally upset. So I attended his funeral alone because after 7 months, nobody cared.
Seven months? That's inexcusable. I knew my husband wouldn't go to his final resting place for a few months because he went to a military cemetery. There's a lot of paperwork and scheduling.
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