U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Grief and Mourning
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
Old 05-26-2018, 07:40 AM
1 posts, read 783 times
Reputation: 15


I have only been to 3 , two of my grandparents and my uncle
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

Old 05-26-2018, 11:00 AM
Location: SWFL
21,433 posts, read 18,150,188 times
Reputation: 18814
Too many.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 05-26-2018, 11:10 AM
4,940 posts, read 2,563,814 times
Reputation: 21941
Have no idea--plenty. As a child we went to a lot of them. The older generation was dying off.
I am a particular European descent (a small, strong Country), we have an entire community of people.
There is always a Wake. In many ways it is a good time--people gathering together and sharing good memories.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 05-26-2018, 11:50 AM
Location: Wisconsin
2,600 posts, read 1,489,444 times
Reputation: 7651
Not that many for my age (64): only 5 that I can remember.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 05-26-2018, 11:52 AM
Location: Nantahala National Forest, NC
17,402 posts, read 3,537,755 times
Reputation: 22615
No idea...but can be expecting more soon due to age grp...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 05-26-2018, 11:55 AM
3,964 posts, read 5,249,971 times
Reputation: 4549
Just wondering why the OP would ask this question.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 05-26-2018, 12:18 PM
Location: California
29,597 posts, read 31,914,576 times
Reputation: 24731
4 or 5. I'm gearing up for a lot more since my parents and inlaws are all entering their 90's now.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 05-26-2018, 12:36 PM
Location: Tyler, Texas
133 posts, read 50,077 times
Reputation: 801
My family is not one for elaborate funerals or mourning.
My mother's small service and cremation was the only
service I had attended and I was over the age of 30.
It was only our small immediate family and we played
a video of photos of her life to remember her by.
Very small and sedate.

Flash forward to age 40. I am starting to notice that
a very nice but somewhat obnoxious elderly man who
visited a family I lived with. He would always try to
kiss or hug me as he left and I felt like he was coming
onto me so I discouraged his advances. He was married
and I knew his wife. Anyway, the last time I saw him
alive he was literally puckering his lips thru the screen
door to kiss me while I was closing it on him. His
wife found him dead two days later, he suffered a
heart attack while out walking around his yard.

His service was huge. I never saw so many
people at a service. When we walked in, his
body lay in an open casket. I thought he was
a seashell, as if his body was not real because he
lay so still and was not physically present at all.
I had never seen an open casket before and I
found it strange and disturbing.

Anyway, during the service I became overwhelmed
with sadness. I didn't really know him, but I felt
so sad that I missed out getting to know such a
apparently great guy because I was leery of him.
I was also very depressed about other things going
on at the time, and I was just bursting into tears
very easily.

I turned to his friend who had brought me to the
service and wailed that I would have let him kiss
me if I would have known he was about to die.
His friend burst out laughing and so did I. Very
funny and sad at the same time.

Flash forward again, March of this year. I am at
my neighbors house, dropping off a meal that I
had made for them. They invited me in to sit and
chat. This woman is 3 years older than me and
she is in awful health. I excuse myself to leave and
she kind of follows me out, I sensed that she
wanted to talk to me about something but I
hurried out and sort of ignored her. Next morning
her partner calls me crying and says that the
woman I mention has died in her sleep. I got
there before the paramedics and helped comfort
my neighbor during the ensuing pick up and
removal of the body.

I spend the next few days taking her back and
forth to the funeral home and arranging the
service. She elected to have the service right
there in the living room. It was a lovely service
and the family did a wonderful job in an intimate
setting that we all were comfortable in. It was
strange for me to be sitting there in the same
spot I was just days before, looking at and
speaking to the woman who was now dead.

The weirdest thing of all is that early that
morning, I was walking my dog past their
house. Unbeknownst to me and the surviving
partner, the woman was already deceased in
her bed. ( when discovered, she was already
in full rigor mortis). Anyway, walking my dog
I have no idea this woman is dead. My dog
stops and starts walking toward their carport
and is sniffing around their ajoining backyard.
I can't understand why my dog is lingering
there, she had never been anywhere near
the house and I just assumed she somehow
smelled me there as I had went in and
dropped the food off to them the early
evening prior.

I think my dog sensed her spirit and that her
spirit was trying to gain my attention somehow
as her body had not yet been discovered.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 05-26-2018, 01:02 PM
Location: Wisconsin
16,481 posts, read 15,923,785 times
Reputation: 38761
That is a strange question. If you are 25 the number would probably be a lot lower than if you were 45 or 65. If you come from a large family the number would be higher than if you were from a small family.

Even where you work makes a difference. If it is a very small office or you work remotely you would attend a lot less funerals than a close knit larger company where you, and your co-workers, have worked for decades. I have probably attended 20 or more funerals over the years of co-workers, co-workers spouses, co-workers children and co-workers parents (funeral held at night or on the weekend).

Also, your employer's attitude towards people attending funerals varies. My former employer did not allow people to take off of work for funerals except for immediate family (parents, spouse, children, siblings). Your grandma died? Tough. Your best friend died? Tough. Your favorite aunt died? Tough. You could not attend the funeral unless you lied and said that you were sick. When my first cousin, who was like a sister to me, died I could not just call in sick because there was a mandatory meeting scheduled for that day. To take off one day (the funeral was round trip 450 miles away) I needed to clear it with my immediate boss, my bosses boss AND the head of the company. Obviously, I would not have risked my job if I did not feel quite strongly that I should attend the funeral.

Now, I have several friends who work for companies with flextime or PTO or are self-employed and it is very easy to take off of work to attend a local funeral.

To answer your question. I really do not recall how many funerals that I attended. Probably, 45 or 50 (maybe even more) over my life time (I'm 66). I come from a large family, with many aunts & uncles, and cousins, so that is where most of the number comes from.

Last edited by germaine2626; 05-26-2018 at 01:21 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 05-26-2018, 01:39 PM
Location: SWFL
21,433 posts, read 18,150,188 times
Reputation: 18814
Originally Posted by G Grasshopper View Post
Just wondering why the OP would ask this question.
That was my first thought too, GG. I looked to see joined this month and has 3 posts. I was not going to answer but decided others would so I went ahead. Maybe lonely? Maybe a troll? Whatever, we shall see.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.

Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Grief and Mourning
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top