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Old 06-10-2018, 04:30 PM
Location: Tyler, Texas
133 posts, read 50,193 times
Reputation: 801


I am so sorry. Please be patient with yourself. You are going to be in mourning for 2 years until the grief will pass and become easier to handle.

I remember when my mom died, a year later if I started to talk about her I would burst out crying. Time does heal, but takes forever to pass into easier times when you grieve.

If it is any help, I have had visits from several deceased people over my life. Each visit is different and completely unexpected. Speak out to your mother and pray when you wish to let her know how you feel. She will hear you and know. She will be there one day when you are hopefully elderly after you have lead a very full life that you know nothing about yet. You will see your mother again when it is your time. And she will be just fine and so will you.

God bless you, this is one of the worst losses you face as you live your life.
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Old 06-10-2018, 05:52 PM
Location: East of the Mississippi and South of Bluegrass
4,099 posts, read 3,390,521 times
Reputation: 8651
kittycat40, so deeply sorry for your loss, sincerely. For those of us who have already been down that road ourselves we understand how profound this passing is and how painful as well.

As others have said, take care of yourself. Do whatever you are able to honor and cherish your memories of her, in time they may give you some comfort.

Prayers for you and your family.
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Old 06-11-2018, 05:32 AM
Location: NC
1,779 posts, read 860,836 times
Reputation: 4145
I am so sorry!

I lost my mom 5 years ago to a heart attack. One minute she was there, then she wasn't. It took me a good year to admit to myself that she was actually gone. I think it was another year before I started having dreams with her in them. I still miss her, but the pain has eased a lot.

Allow yourself to grieve on your own timeline. Don't let anyone tell you how or when you should get over your sadness.
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Old 06-14-2018, 09:38 AM
329 posts, read 448,100 times
Reputation: 399
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my mother recently as well (in April) and after the arrangements are made and the "busy" time is over, the loss just keeps sinking in.

I personally find that when I'm sad, I'll think of a happy memory or think of something that I'm grateful for in regards to my parents. I started doing this after I lost my father suddenly 2 years ago. It has really helped me to use my sadness to focus on the great memories that I have, but I know everybody is different. It was hard for me at first, but I've found this time with losing my mother, it is a little easier.

I've also committed to taking the best traits of both of my parents and incorporating them into my life. My father was very fun-loving whereas I'm very uptight. I've made a conscious effort to book more fun trips with my kids so we can really enjoy our time. I know I'll never be as fun as my father was, but by doing more fun things, it puts me in a better mindset. My mother was incredibly strong and kind when she was dying. I am forever inspired by her strength. And her ability to keep her sense of humor right up to the very end. I take that with me every day as well--if she can handle death with that kind of grace, I can navigate through my daily life with a little bit of that!
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Old 06-18-2018, 03:17 PM
311 posts, read 356,002 times
Reputation: 499
So very sorry for your loss. Give yourself time and cry when you need to. I too lost my mom, 2 years ago. Reading all these posts make me feel better. I have felt all the emotions in these posts. I agree with them all. It's very hard to let yourself have quite time. Because all emotions come rolling in. Sometimes I still can't believe that I can't pick up the phone and call her. I do think of her every day. Prayers to you.
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Old 06-18-2018, 05:22 PM
Location: Wilmington, NC
1,316 posts, read 227,605 times
Reputation: 2096

I am so sorry.
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Old 06-20-2018, 11:11 AM
74 posts, read 9,147 times
Reputation: 31
Originally Posted by kittycat40
Im so sorry kittycat......

I know how much ya loved her
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Old 06-20-2018, 12:13 PM
Location: Tulare County, Ca
1,031 posts, read 608,067 times
Reputation: 1767
I can't say anymore that hasn't been said here already, but know that I truly, truly feel your pain. I hope, if your father is still living, that you and he can take comfort with each other. We'll be here for you too if you need us.
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