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Old 12-03-2018, 10:19 AM
 
13,285 posts, read 8,442,400 times
Reputation: 31512

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Tomorrow will be the 6th anniversary of my mom's passing. Approximately 4 days ago my swirling grief commenced. It's been particularly different ( as it should) due to other stressors. I took it upon myself to travel to see my dear aunt...my mom's sister. In hopes of a quiet few days...of emotional support . Lo and behold I arrive only to realize she is going thru some eminent challenges. My uncle is weeks away from meeting the maker. They have chosen to make these last week's comfortable and quiet. My heart was torn..filled with sorrow for my aunts ' upcoming loss...and for an uncle who I admire so. It's just been a swirl of grief as I go thru these days. I dreaded leaving her. As strong as she is in pushing thru...this man has been her rock..her cheerleader. I don't know if she'll come thru this ...it was two years ago she lost her only son. This may be the straw....
Anyways...it's cathartic to share this here..and while it doesn't change the facts..it does validate that for us who's lives are impacted. .we are not alone in this journey...our swirls of emotions continue...
On a tribute note....Dear Mom...I love you..miss you ..and cherish all you bestowed.
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Old 12-03-2018, 11:20 AM
 
Location: Southern MN
12,038 posts, read 8,403,014 times
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Lovely thoughts, Nov3. Perhaps you are right where you need to be right now both physically and emotionally. One never knows at the time. It's only in retrospect that we get the full meaning of our experiences.

Swirling grief is an apt phrase. I think of mine as coming in waves. It certainly is fluid and amorphous like water.

I hope this time helps you with some of your grief and also helps your aunt and uncle.
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Old 12-03-2018, 12:23 PM
 
13,285 posts, read 8,442,400 times
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Thank you Lodestar. What irony in your post....I recall the first days of losing my mom..my son called my home. He was worried about my well being...and I said to him in such a mellow tone....this is where I'm meant to be. So thank you ,for that reminder that we are where we are meant to be.
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Old 12-05-2018, 04:47 PM
 
Location: Tulare County, Ca
1,570 posts, read 1,378,480 times
Reputation: 3225
Swirling grief......I like it. So poetic and appropriate. These are the seasons where it swirls around us, sometimes like a soft wind...sometimes like a hurricane.


Christmas day will be the fourth anniversary of my husbands passing. I don't know if I'm where I need to be, but I am where I am and I've learned to live with it.


May the upcoming holidays find you, if not happy, at least content. Hang in there. It will get better.
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Old 12-13-2018, 10:43 AM
 
Location: Minnesota
561 posts, read 323,993 times
Reputation: 1732
Quote:
Originally Posted by janellen View Post
I don't know if I'm where I need to be, but I am where I am and I've learned to live with it.

Well that pretty much sums it up. My heart goes out to you all. My father died 5 years ago tomorrow, 2 days short of their 57th anniversary. I spent that day with my mother choosing flowers for his casket and we laid him to rest the next day. She is "fine" most days as well but this obviously isn't the part of the future you ever envision.
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Old 12-17-2018, 12:11 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
32,922 posts, read 36,316,341 times
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Though many years ago, my brother died on December 13th. That was also my late husband's birthday.

That doesn't quite put me in the mood to bake cookies.
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Old 12-18-2018, 10:57 AM
 
Location: Not where I want to be
24,509 posts, read 24,184,303 times
Reputation: 24282
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gerania View Post
Though many years ago, my brother died on December 13th. That was also my late husband's birthday.

That doesn't quite put me in the mood to bake cookies.
Didn't see this 'til just now, G, hugs for you belatedly. ((()))
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