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Old 01-02-2019, 11:55 PM
 
222 posts, read 113,802 times
Reputation: 494

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After my late husband died, my two dogs and father died shortly thereafter. I was a emotional wreck and my Doctor ordered me to see a Counselor. During my husband's illness I saw three Counselors and two Psychologists and they were awful. They wanted to talk about their experiences with Alzheimer's or their children. I found a Counselor who was spiritual and my first visit with her I gave her the low down, that I did not want to hear about her family, her husband and children, I explained I need guidance and her help. She listened to me and nodded she would adhere to my demands. My appointments with her were twice a week for three months and thereafter twice a month. This woman worked on me with diligence. Three years later I walked out of her office for the last time, I felt strong, complete and whole. I kept in touch with her periodically. December 2nd I received a email from her addressed to all of her clients and she said she was closing her practice due to a sudden terminal illness. She started to get blood clots and a heart valve was replaced and when she started to recoup she was told she has terminal liver cancer, her blood clots were caused by the liver. She told me she loved me and that was really shocking to me because I did not know this. I once hugged her and told her I loved her and ran out of her office. I use to tell her she was the best Counselor in the world. She is 60 years old, she never smoked, never drank alcohol, never did anything that would damage her body. She hiked almost everyday. She is leaving behind a husband and three children. The Doctors told her she can't take chemo due to her recent heart operation. I feel so distraught over this. In her email she asked about my declining health and hoped I was doing okay. I cry most everyday. I wrote her a few emails but just to relate how much she meant to me during the three years and how much she helped me. I am having trouble comprehending this horrible news.
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Old 01-04-2019, 11:23 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
23,383 posts, read 22,388,425 times
Reputation: 28590
I'm so sorry. I've only had one good psyche counselor in my life and since he was seeing me outside of his day job, had to refer me to someone else. He had a gift and made me feel that there was hope, and that I would be OK.
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Old 01-04-2019, 11:56 AM
 
Location: Nantahala National Forest, NC
19,976 posts, read 4,226,452 times
Reputation: 25321
So sorry to hear this....I too have had only one counselor out of many
who was just wonderful at her job.

Receiving your notes must be very satisfying to her....and helps you too since you are able to say how grateful you are...

it's certainly hard when someone who has helped you through life's difficulties now has a terminal illness.

((Hugs))

gbh
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Old 01-04-2019, 03:07 PM
 
112 posts, read 24,494 times
Reputation: 191
I'm sure she is happy to have received your notes and to know that she made you better. I'm sorry that she is not well. Big hug to you.
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Old 01-04-2019, 07:00 PM
 
Location: Charleston, SC
1,031 posts, read 1,855,661 times
Reputation: 502
The pain is palpable just reading your words. I am so sorry you have suffered so much loss. Sometimes it's so hard to understand the "Why" such horrible things happen to such wonderful people. I wish I had the words to help you get through this. My brother in law died 3 years ago from stomach cancer. A horrible, wretched way to die. He was such a good man..kind, honorable and so giving. My sister still cries every day. I try to help her by letting her know she has many people that love her but her pain is just too deep. I'm not sure if you're a person of faith. Sometimes going through these difficult times makes you question your faith. Pray for comfort and peace in your heart for we will never know the why's until we pass. Life challenges us with some of the most horrendous things to endure, but try to take solace in knowing you were so important to your counselor that she actually came to love and care for you. Receiving love is an eternal gift. Not even death can take that away. You must be a very special person. I will lift up prayers for you in the hopes God comforts you in some way..
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Old 01-05-2019, 02:16 PM
 
30 posts, read 2,336 times
Reputation: 47
I will also pray for you Granite60..... Sounds like you have been thru alot!!!!

I am so sorry and wish I could do more than type to you!!!! (Well I can pray that God will help you)

God bless you
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Old 01-06-2019, 06:53 AM
 
Location: In the house we finally own!
415 posts, read 197,605 times
Reputation: 1780
I am so sorry Granite60. It is hard knowing someone you love and respect, who has a special place in your heart, is dying. I just went through this a few months ago, and it still hurts. I will always miss her.
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Old 01-06-2019, 09:51 PM
 
6,378 posts, read 2,165,240 times
Reputation: 4413
Quote:
Originally Posted by Granite60 View Post
After my late husband died, my two dogs and father died shortly thereafter. I was a emotional wreck and my Doctor ordered me to see a Counselor. During my husband's illness I saw three Counselors and two Psychologists and they were awful. They wanted to talk about their experiences with Alzheimer's or their children. I found a Counselor who was spiritual and my first visit with her I gave her the low down, that I did not want to hear about her family, her husband and children, I explained I need guidance and her help. She listened to me and nodded she would adhere to my demands. My appointments with her were twice a week for three months and thereafter twice a month. This woman worked on me with diligence. Three years later I walked out of her office for the last time, I felt strong, complete and whole. I kept in touch with her periodically. December 2nd I received a email from her addressed to all of her clients and she said she was closing her practice due to a sudden terminal illness. She started to get blood clots and a heart valve was replaced and when she started to recoup she was told she has terminal liver cancer, her blood clots were caused by the liver. She told me she loved me and that was really shocking to me because I did not know this. I once hugged her and told her I loved her and ran out of her office. I use to tell her she was the best Counselor in the world. She is 60 years old, she never smoked, never drank alcohol, never did anything that would damage her body. She hiked almost everyday. She is leaving behind a husband and three children. The Doctors told her she can't take chemo due to her recent heart operation. I feel so distraught over this. In her email she asked about my declining health and hoped I was doing okay. I cry most everyday. I wrote her a few emails but just to relate how much she meant to me during the three years and how much she helped me. I am having trouble comprehending this horrible news.
I am so sorry for you and your counselor. I had a very special counselor whom I loved as well. It's hard to lose someone who knows you as well or better than you know yourself, especially when they have helped you to become whole. Hugs to you.
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Old Today, 01:12 AM
 
4,049 posts, read 5,342,422 times
Reputation: 4675
I am very sorry about this. A counselor hears our innermost thoughts, sometimes things we were not even aware of. And if the counselor has restored you to life, I can understand how close you might feel to her. It is very sad that this is happening to her, and at such a young age. I'm sure it is also devastating to her family. I think it is a good idea that you have told her how much she meant to you. We all want to know that our lives have been meaningful and that we have helped others. It may also be helpful to you to know that you have not left anything unsaid, but thanked her and supported her when she needed it most.
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